Lazarus 0 Posted June 18, 2006 Author Share Posted June 18, 2006 The relationship between a woman and her toilet is based on trust, understanding and the promise of not laughing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 That bog looks fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 Wooa, Im seeing the Womans mind working here and it psychadelic man.... Ok, lets see.... The loo in the house you have bought becomes "your" loo. Aye, but surely you dont really know it yet? When you first move in you must know it as much as you know the bog in a pub? Granted, you might not have the need to "float" in your new house, but is there no courting period with the new bog or do you do the blokey thing and christen it on the first day? (or better yet when viewing the house, after alll its one of the most important times and it has to feel right). Next... Whatever that is tells me and my sister we can poo when we are at Mam & Dads house, when either of us visit there we always seem to need a dump. Often my Mam has asked if we only go there to use her loo. Ok, so what you are saying is, you and your sis have a collective thought that tells you when to crap? worse yet, it always seems to be in te same house? Hmmm, Ive heard stories about houses that talk to people, never like this like, maybe it has a fetish about seeing lasses crap. Or maybe it likes the feeling of the crap sliding down its pipe. 150479[/snapback] I am unable to explain womens logic to a man, I give up, you win. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ted Maul 0 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 So is pooing on a strange loo for women the equivilant of stage fright when pissing for a man? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
indigo 0 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 If you think that's bad have a look at what they've put in Piccadilly Gardens in Manchester: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasepud 59 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 Wooa, Im seeing the Womans mind working here and it psychadelic man.... Ok, lets see.... The loo in the house you have bought becomes "your" loo. Aye, but surely you dont really know it yet? When you first move in you must know it as much as you know the bog in a pub? Granted, you might not have the need to "float" in your new house, but is there no courting period with the new bog or do you do the blokey thing and christen it on the first day? (or better yet when viewing the house, after alll its one of the most important times and it has to feel right). Next... Whatever that is tells me and my sister we can poo when we are at Mam & Dads house, when either of us visit there we always seem to need a dump. Often my Mam has asked if we only go there to use her loo. Ok, so what you are saying is, you and your sis have a collective thought that tells you when to crap? worse yet, it always seems to be in te same house? Hmmm, Ive heard stories about houses that talk to people, never like this like, maybe it has a fetish about seeing lasses crap. Or maybe it likes the feeling of the crap sliding down its pipe. 150479[/snapback] Look, you and your fancy left wing toilet dan ideas, coming round here spouting (or not) shite fed to you by fancy toilet lecturers, you dont know me, you dont know what experience I have of female toilet habits. Who are you to tell me? you sandal wearing poo-gooder you. JAWD - Ive got two toilets so I know how to shite better than most Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 "poo-gooder" geez we do have some strange conversations on here at times. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 6308 Posted June 18, 2006 Share Posted June 18, 2006 Women are fucking weird - FACT! When you need to shit, you need to shit - who gives a fuck where the bog is? Fact of the matter is, you all (should) shower every day anyway so your arses should be clean anyway.... You'll do yourself an internal injury keeping a turd at bay just because it's not your own crapper. And what's so special about your own? Filled with Evian or something? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 31 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 <snip> JAWD - Ive got two toilets so I know how to shite better than most 150493[/snapback] [ colour=mirkybrownwithbitsofyellow] Hey, we can all change colours, just a shame the database doesnt seem to recognise shite after a curry colour. Anyway, so which one is your fave? No, one of them is and you know it. Likely the one that you read at. While the other with be more of an emergency bog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 <snip> JAWD - Ive got two toilets so I know how to shite better than most 150493[/snapback] [ colour=mirkybrownwithbitsofyellow] Hey, we can all change colours, just a shame the database doesnt seem to recognise shite after a curry colour. Anyway, so which one is your fave? No, one of them is and you know it. Likely the one that you read at. While the other with be more of an emergency bog. 150515[/snapback] Just to add further confusion to mans understanding of womens logic... Of the 3 loos Id poo on ive no fave, and although this will be hard for the male mind to comprehend, I NEVER read on the loo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasepud 59 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Just to add further confusion to mans understanding of womens logic... Of the 3 loos Id poo on ive no fave, and although this will be hard for the male mind to comprehend, I NEVER read on the loo. 150516[/snapback] eh? how does that work like? is it possible to open your rectum unless theres a copy of the Sun/ Times/ Computer Weekly/ Caravanners world/ gerbil felchers monthly in your hand? I have to read something, Ive seen me grab the first book to hand and open it at a random page. Ive taken take-away menus, computer manuals even the yellow pages once Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 133 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Reading on the shitter is essential, I've got a pile of old FHM's next to mine, but my current toilet book is Lord of the Rings (insert ring piece gag). But I've always said, the benchmark of a good book is when you read it on the lav you've sat there so long the colour has begun seeping out of your log ! Although I can happily take a dump almost anywhere, there's nothing quite as comforting as nipping one off on your own lav. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Reading on the shitter is essential, I've got a pile of old FHM's next to mine, but my current toilet book is Lord of the Rings (insert ring piece gag). But I've always said, the benchmark of a good book is when you read it on the lav you've sat there so long the colour has begun seeping out of your log ! Although I can happily take a dump almost anywhere, there's nothing quite as comforting as nipping one off on your own lav. 150556[/snapback] That's a lifetime's worth of shits tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 31 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Sign of a good bog read is when you start getting pins n needles in your legs It is a must like, Ive seen me sit there and search for something to read end up grabbing one of wor lasses shampoo bottles and reading the back of it ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 133 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 I've often been tempted to buy this: Reviews Synopsis This massive compendium of knowledge consists of over 120 two-page summaries of books ranging from "Macbeth" to "Don Quixote del la Mancha" to "The City of Joy" to "The Time Machine". "Passing Time In The Loo", which includes brief summaries of these works, additionally consists of brief biographies of some of history's greatest leaders, geniuses, scientists, healers, artists and inventors. It also carries a Word Power section designed to expand anybody's vocabulary and many witty and wise anecdotes that will amuse and educate at the same time. This book features all this together with an amazing Business and Leadership section as well. From the Publisher For sitters and thinkers........ ‘There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke’. You might recognise that as a quote from Bob Dylan’s All Along The Watchtower, but who said ‘The role of a mother is to deliver children obstetrically once and by car forever after’ or ‘Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit’?* You might find answers to those in a dictionary of quotations, but what if somebody asked you over dinner about some of the most famous books in history, which you just never got around to reading … Paradise Lost, Lord of the Flies, To Kill a Mockingbird, Macbeth or even 1984? Would you admit total ignorance or would you try to bluff your way through? Now you don’t have to do either. A must-have book called Passing Time In The Loo gives you all this information and plenty more besides. As well as including two-page summaries of these works and more than 115 others, it has brief biographies of religious and political leaders, scientists, healers, artists and explorers. There is also a Word Power section designed to expand anybody’s vocabulary and many witty and wise anecdotes that will amuse and educate at the same time. Designed so the reader can dip in and out at whim, picking up easily-absorbed snippets of information without ever feeling bogged down with too much data, Passing Time In The Loo [of course, it can be read anywhere-not only in the loo] also includes sections on health and fitness, personal effectiveness and even foreign words and phrases. The only question is- 'Will you have time to read it ALL in the loo?' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Going back to what Toplass was trying to say....you fellas are missing the point, its not the fact its a strange loo at all...its the fact of where it is! I just cannot 'go' if there are people in and out and chatting outside the loo im in! Or if someone is in the cubicle next door! If its a solitary loo, then no problems....fire away! Mind, if its a single loo with a queue forming outside, then again, i just cant go, i feel under pressure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 133 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Going back to what Toplass was trying to say....you fellas are missing the point, its not the fact its a strange loo at all...its the fact of where it is! I just cannot 'go' if there are people in and out and chatting outside the loo im in! Or if someone is in the cubicle next door! If its a solitary loo, then no problems....fire away! Mind, if its a single loo with a queue forming outside, then again, i just cant go, i feel under pressure 150640[/snapback] I tend to make a cradle of skid-sheet in the bottom of the pan so not to make a "Plop" for all to hear ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Going back to what Toplass was trying to say....you fellas are missing the point, its not the fact its a strange loo at all...its the fact of where it is! I just cannot 'go' if there are people in and out and chatting outside the loo im in! Or if someone is in the cubicle next door! If its a solitary loo, then no problems....fire away! Mind, if its a single loo with a queue forming outside, then again, i just cant go, i feel under pressure 150640[/snapback] I tend to make a cradle of skid-sheet in the bottom of the pan so not to make a "Plop" for all to hear ! 150642[/snapback] Been there done that What i hate is hearing the other 'plops' going on around me (what a strange conversation this is) !! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34622 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Going on that bog would be weird. If someone was looking at themself in the mirror as they walked along, you'd be absolutely convinced that they were staring and could see what you were doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 how about this then? How is this meant to be used? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimbo 133 Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 how about this then? How is this meant to be used? 150649[/snapback] Continental wrongness tbh ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 Has someone left their slippers there or are they attached to the floor? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted June 19, 2006 Author Share Posted June 19, 2006 I've often been tempted to buy this: Reviews Synopsis This massive compendium of knowledge consists of over 120 two-page summaries of books ranging from "Macbeth" to "Don Quixote del la Mancha" to "The City of Joy" to "The Time Machine". "Passing Time In The Loo", which includes brief summaries of these works, additionally consists of brief biographies of some of history's greatest leaders, geniuses, scientists, healers, artists and inventors. It also carries a Word Power section designed to expand anybody's vocabulary and many witty and wise anecdotes that will amuse and educate at the same time. This book features all this together with an amazing Business and Leadership section as well. From the Publisher For sitters and thinkers........ ‘There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke’. You might recognise that as a quote from Bob Dylan’s All Along The Watchtower, but who said ‘The role of a mother is to deliver children obstetrically once and by car forever after’ or ‘Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit’?* You might find answers to those in a dictionary of quotations, but what if somebody asked you over dinner about some of the most famous books in history, which you just never got around to reading … Paradise Lost, Lord of the Flies, To Kill a Mockingbird, Macbeth or even 1984? Would you admit total ignorance or would you try to bluff your way through? Now you don’t have to do either. A must-have book called Passing Time In The Loo gives you all this information and plenty more besides. As well as including two-page summaries of these works and more than 115 others, it has brief biographies of religious and political leaders, scientists, healers, artists and explorers. There is also a Word Power section designed to expand anybody’s vocabulary and many witty and wise anecdotes that will amuse and educate at the same time. Designed so the reader can dip in and out at whim, picking up easily-absorbed snippets of information without ever feeling bogged down with too much data, Passing Time In The Loo [of course, it can be read anywhere-not only in the loo] also includes sections on health and fitness, personal effectiveness and even foreign words and phrases. The only question is- 'Will you have time to read it ALL in the loo?' 150639[/snapback] Sounds a fun read Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted June 19, 2006 Share Posted June 19, 2006 The Time Machine only takes about 2 hours to read ffs! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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