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Was happy hour. All pizzas* £4.50 *Except for seafood pizzas, add £1.(Perez ordered one and his card's now marked, there's always one who abuses a kind gesture).

Once you go fat, you always think fuck that.

Que Ta-Ra, Ta-Ra, more like

Still too many fuzzy plotting points and far too rushed. I think Arya has a new list with one name on it.

Season hasn’t finished and I already can’t be arsed with summer transfer talk and all the bollocks that goes with it

Can't tell whether he's just started his lawn mower, is about to unleash a furious uppercut or is just a very enthusiastic hokey pokey'er.

It was in Ponteland mate. £8.50

Lots of people like being told what to think without even realising. They’ll lap up what Morgan says even though the bloke himself doesn’t even believe it

If all of these rumours are true we'll have no-one left to do training.

ritchie rumoured to be leaving. i'd be sorry to see him go. no one puts in more of a shift and he contributes with assists.

They probably bought a new paddling pool.

She won't be seeing the light of day again...

Sambucas ?

If we could have a 0-0 dirge followed by a two hour long penalty shoot out, just to sap all the energy and happiness out of anyone watching before someone finally wins it that'd do I guess

I heard that The Former Foot Soldier similarly took the lads out to celebrate another top-level award, and Cock-Eyed Mala played the Perez role and ordered prawn cocktail starter instead of the option of potato skins or minestrone soup. Some fucking people…

I really like Klopp and pochettino but I hate spurs and Liverpool. Both losing the champions league final is my unrealistic preferred option

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Aye, like Phil Thompson is known for being impartial

I’m honestly not sure I’ll know who I want to win until I start watching the match. Maybe not even then. If I watch it

Yeah, why would money be a factor in what’s likely to be his last big contract?

Euron cementing his place as the shittest character on the show. His little quips ffs

The advantage of being a minority party is that you can spout whatever you want, because you will never have to deliver it. Unfortunately, soundbites seem to work with the social media obsessed ADD followers, who have no time to give consideration for anything, so just go with what sounds good at the time, even if it makes no sense at all. After all, the Moron in Chief in the US has got to the top by doing so, and Trump-lites all over the world just follow his lead, and the voters are happy to be led by the nose.

Is it because he has said so?

One of the SSN blokes said "The agonising 29 year wait for the title goes on". Agonising.

The tell tale sign of a boring Brummie bellend is the classic "fooking" spelling

Lovely to see that, on top of the disappointment at not winning the league, Liverpool fans have realised that nobody wanted them to win it and have taken it very, very badly

Whilst the dulcet strains of Captain Pugwash wash over the sun kissed sands

How the fuck can any sane person come to the conclusion Farage conducted himself well in that interview? It was a fucking car crash, and what's more, he knew it. This is what really scares me. Either people don't see this, or they don't care anyway. Ian Dunt made a comment on this this week. Farage literally has no policies, he represents a post political world. This really is 1930s Germany stuff. Please everyone don't underestimate the threat from him.

Schar cost less money and scored more goals than Will Grigg

There wasn’t a Fulham shirt in sight man. My little boy’s First proper away day experience. He loved the atmosphere more than having to stand all game. and missed the rondon goal because of the size of the lad in front of him. He’s still got a 100% win record and minimum three goals for every game he’s been to. I should have put some money on it. I have to keep telling him it isn’t always like this

Perez and Rondon both finished with more goals than Mitrovic this season. ARE YOU WATCHING, RAFA?

God imagine how many up we'd be if Ayoze and Mitro swapped sides

Mate, no one questioned why a desk soldier grabbed a rifle, chased a van down the street and murdered an unarmed civilian. Quite a lot of blind eyes were turned.

Really dying on that hill like, I don’t mind Mitrovic but Rondon is better and if we had sold Mitro for £27m (or whatever it was) and bought Rondon for £16m like Rafa wanted it’d have been brilliant business.

And as always, Noelie’s nurse will be regretting being on shift while Newcastle are playing.

If you don’t go with two stotties duct-taped to the side of your head, Princess Leia style, and blast “Let’s Get Ready to Rumble” by PJ & Duncan through your phone for 90 minutes, whilst dribbling LCL Pils down your top, you’re not the man I thought you were.

What's the worst that they'll do? Chuck their hummus at you? Go in full kit and sing about Scott Parker being a dick. Unless you're too soft to pull it off. Can't believe you've bottled it. Tart.

Doesn’t fit the profile. The profile doesnt include being class obviously.

It’s another master stroke by the club. We could have probably gotten him for a relatively reasonable fee (ditto wages) if we’d tried properly to sign him permanently last summer. Now that he’s done well he’s strengthened both his and West Brom’s bargaining position and will have other suitors. Fanks, Mike

Three days before his prime spot on Marr where he complained about BBC bias.