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I’m a disabled veteran I beat able bodied blackbelts in my hand me down Gi and yellow belt. It was at the Scottish karate Grand Prix it was fun.

Relegation form.

Bob Mortimer comforted me by defying expectations. You've comforted me by living up to all of the bawdy standards I've come to expect from you. Bellend.

hat doffed mate. think you've just destroyed the fucking pitiful mackem cunt.

How he can’t see that we need a defender who actually wants to defend instead of wannabe midfielders is beyond me.

Put the fucker down But can we keep the dog?

https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/veterinary-costs-for-injured-pup So is the dog called Inca or Leyla? Terrier or springer spaniel? Fuck off, you lying prick.

Let's not show our love too publicly, it'll make people queasy. Like we're loved up teenagers or inconsiderate homosexuals on a bus.

Yes but you do have to remember that Scotland is heavily reliant on the rest of the UK for trade. Post-Brexit barriers to trade would severely hamper a newly independent Scotland.

Agreed. This could be the worst legacy of Brexit, worse than the economic impact long term. I hope it's not too late but it feels like the genie is out the lamp now.

I'm half Scottish anyway and I'd consider myself Northumbrian rather than English. Who do you associate with most, Scots or brummies? Fuck English nationalism that has led us to this mess. Fuck England.

No you’re right it’s impossible for the status quo to continue when you look at it with any degree of clarity. I just fear for the entire UK on its break up which seems inevitable now. Who knows what will be unleashed. Whenever there is a hard border anywhere on the planet there are issues. I think the price for an independent Scotland within the EU will be border posts in Scotland. I saw it happen in Croatia in 2013. It will be a way for the EU to punish what will then probably be England & Wales for leaving.

There’s an image no one wants for breakfast

The bottom line is that the best batsmen (and bowlers) in the world can and do play all forms of the game. The absolute best players (Kohli, Smith, Williamson), though, can and do play the conditions and occasion, not just the same game each time. We need to coach resilience and perspective, not just "see it - hit it", especially early in an innings or when the match needs to be drawn.

I reckon Cummings will have given it a second thought, and will not have cared, but Johnson won't have considered it at all, because it has no relevance to "getting Brexit done".

Also, when I'm here, I watched the second series of Mortimer and Whitehouse: Gone Fishing and found it equal parts hilarious, touching and genuinely moving. A beautiful depiction of genuine friendship, stripped of all pretence, filled with warmth and affection throughout. Bob Mortimer pretty much done me in at two separate points; the gifts given to Paul with the express instruction to not touch either until he dies, with the implicit intonation that he is very much aware of his mortality cutting through like a knife and that, coupled with his description of the "eureka" moment of depression hit me harder than I honestly expected it to. As someone struggling with persistent thoughts of meaninglessness, depression and existential anxiety, seeing these raw, candid slices of emotion from him and how he places so much emphasis on the small things made me feel a lot better. Life is not what we do, it's the meaning we attach to things throughout our shared experiences with people we love and we all have something, even when we think have nothing. There's no punchline to this, I just have to get this out.

We've all done it. I'm not saying Cameron isn't a fucking massive cunt, but if there is a hierarchy of cunts, then Johnson is several rungs higher. Imo.

I agree with you Johnson and Cummings are uniquely special cunts. I don't necessarily think there is equivalence between Cameeon and Johnson. I don't see evidence Cameron is a racist or misogynist. I don't recall Cameron assaulting his girlfriend or get journalists beaten up. At least he is a family man who I think probably loves his wife, rather than a serial cheater who doesn't know how many kids he has. Does that count for anything? Not much maybe, but it's something. Even Johnson's brother thinks he's unfit to be a PM.

He can do you a swap deal for some snide viagra.

Left- wing poncery.

I'm on Merlot which, before we get the jibes in, I'm aware will surprise none of you

Gonna put on record that I've been drinking so if I'm more robust in my assertions than usual, then I apologise. Still fucking right though

I think that if the past couple of years have shown anything it’s the importance of having a speaker prepared to stand up for Parliament against a government trying to ride roughshod over it. MPs will be taking that into consideration when deciding his replacement.

There's not many batsmen showing it at test level at the moment, whether that's down to conditions, bowler or (my personal belief) the focus on white ball cricket around the world meaning batsmen aren't used to playing the way they need to. As Stokes said, the flip side of that is we're able to see innings like he produced at Heddlingley. Mind the way it's going we aren't going to be able to see the first part of that innings from many players. I definitely think we should be splitting the red and white ball coaching duties. I don't blame the ECB for focusing on white ball these past few years because winning the world cup was massive for us, but it does feel somewhat overdone when you look at how are test team are performing now. And what happens now? Do we switch it back around and lose our standing as the top odi team or fail to prepare for the T20 world cup? Surely having someone focusing on the white ball game solely would be the better option. Obviously they need to be looking at the make up of the county championship season too but with the hundred starting next year I don't imagine there's going to be any immediate changes with the program.

whoever the new coach is has to try to develop a proper strategy for test match cricket, the aim being to regain the ashes next winter, reinstalling a 5 day game batting mindset - there were glimpses of it at old trafford from the players you mentioned, from buttler too - then picking players capable of causing them problems down under. i'd see if dizzy gillespie fancies it. his coaching record is good, he knows the CC and how to win on australian pitches.

Fuck paying like.

He's not from Genova, he's a very naughty boy

Best team won