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Breaking out the lolz for his loyal puntaz.

Trolled by The Colonel

Imagine him on the Thunderpiss or whatever it’s called at Alton Towers. Flying down the drop screaming “This is just like the Mag’s campaign lolz!!”

It was during an interview with Steve Wraith. I'll keep the powder dry regarding the takeover celebrations just for now.

FYP

Outlived Death by 48 years. I reckon we'd all take that.

"Bruce guided Man United to trophy after trophy under Sir Alex Ferguson"

Luke Edwards seemingly missing the point that it’s his relationship with the manager that is being alluded to.

So no problem there then

4-0. Beige cunts.

Mayweather was on a speaking tour of the UK. I had the chance to go but it was a ludicrous amount of money to hear the ramblings of an uneducated money obsessed thug. Basically a wet dream for the sort of inadequate self aggrandising wanker who would write a book about the Krays

So you’re telling me there’s a chance..

I’m already getting nostalgic for that time when all we talked about was Brexit

That's probably improved our chances by a little bit as the crowd will need to be at it and that means a bit more pissed than normal. Same applies to Man City though, although I wonder if they'll have bigger fish to fry around then?

Anyone who has the time to post on Toontastic during working hours is automatically assigned to Ark B

That's an uncomfortably specific thing to know.

Villa getting a pasting

If the true Geordie can interview the likes of Shearer, Wraith can interview Mayweather. Fuck it, if true Geordie can interview Shearer, then there's a chance a real heavyweight like Ryder might even be able to grab an exclusive with Paul Sweeney about THAT season we nearly got promoted in 1990.

how that is enforced i don't know. cop - where are you going? gianni - work cop - ok, carry on gianni - legs it

Villa getting beat. Brilliant

She can have an ice cream, a small one as it’ll be a weekday.

This thing is probably going to kill in the hundreds of thousands in the UK alone. Our best chance would probably to delay it until the weather warms, but I suspect we've ran out of time.

Let her spend the refund on something nice. I remember the only foreign trip I did at school, a skiing holiday in Austria. Snapped my leg in two on the first fucking run, spent the weak in hospital dosed on morphine but still in agony, couldn't walk for months etc. Anyway, the costs of the holiday were covered by insurance. Did my parents let me have any of it? Did they fuck! 35 years on I'm still resentful.

Cunt

He sees things that would pass mere mortals by. He's a Geordie demi-God.

I bet he hasn't got a fucking clue who we are

Apparently he great with crosses.

Still, at least he's not going to catch coronavirus seeing as his hands can't reach his face.

He'll always be Ming to me

Honestly, if one of the unintended side-effects of this whole thing is more companies and organisations realising how much can actually be done remotely these days without commuting, business travel etc., then that'd be something, at least. I know that's limited to those of us who work in service industries that don't actually make or produce anything of use and we'll be the first on Golgafrincham Ark B when the time comes, but at least we'll have had a healthier work-life balance in the meantime.

One Star - Abysmal

Well, I suppose it’s preferable to whoring round the Alps like you did.

I tell you what, I bet with this coronavirus, the bloke who invented the hand gel is rubbing his hands

Quite interested to know what @NJS and @Rayvin make of that graph concerning New Labour?

He’s the Mike Ashley of forum trolls tbh.

The Mrs. threatened to leave me because of my obsession with flamingoes. I really had to put my foot down.

So, I went in to the chemist and asked the lass ” What kills coronavirus on kitchen surfaces and that” ”Ammonia cleaner” she said. I said “ Sorry love, I thought you worked here”.

I just bought a universal remote control. I thought to myself “ Well, this changes everything”.

Just been in to Starbucks and the barista was wearing a face mask. I asked "why are you wearing a surgical mask?" She said "I'm not, it's a coughy filter."

There's an Innuendo competition that's just been announced, I might enter the lass next door.

Was doing some cooking a few years ago and without thinking rubbed my eyes after I'd just chopped up some herbs. I've been parsley sighted ever since.

She can badly develop my business.