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My bamp neighbours have invited a load of their scummer mates round for a barbecue, and the fucking heavens have opened. Each raindrop like a bucket.

I see the dickheads are out in force in London already. Jumping of bus roofs and cheering each other snorting Coke in the street. We've got a team full of sensible, down to Earth players with a social conscience, and a fan base full of absolute Brexit gammon arseholes. No wonder the whole world is supporting Italy tonight

If we’re 3-0 up in injury time he’ll be like : phone your boss now and tell them they’re a cunt, kids burn down your school and kill your parents.

A huge share of the blame has to fall on Southgate, that was very poorly managed and our shootout lineup was a disaster. Italy were the better team in the match overall and they deserved to win, so congratulations. If we'd gone after their ageing centerbacks in extra time instead of waiting for penalties and sitting back, this match could've had a different outcome.

I've got myself 4 cans for tonight. I'm a fucking wild man. I don't think they'd let me in - my disdain for them is well understood. One of the neighbours from across the street once approached me when I was on the drive and (right next to the bamp house) and said "what do you make of this lot?", pointing at the bamp house. First time I'd even spoken to this bloke so I knew I was on safe ground when I went off on one about how they were complete scummers. Only noticed their living room windows were wide open when I'd finished.

Hopefully

Big news from Wembley on the day England play Italy in the final of the European championship....... ARE, and I cannot stress this enough, YOU NOT ENTERTAINED, loyal punters?

I'll be out so probably won't hear the shite but if I was in it would be BBC all day long. First and foremost, Matterface, the worst commentator I've ever heard is being given the microphone for some big games and that blows my mind tbh, did they not listen to him first before giving him the job? I'd honestly have Charles Harrison or Roger Tames over this knacka. Then there's the adverts plus ITV promoting a premium line phone competition etc whilst the BBC just do it better. Jenas is shite and Ferdinand is a knob but I'd put up with them over listening to the horror show of Matterface and moonface Dixon.

Thought we were shite tbh. Not unhappy or angry we lost, but we that we played our worst game (maybe scotland) in the final. Average age of 24 in that squad, a likeable manager who also needs to learn and improve. Proud of the players, especially Saka taking a pen at 19 when there are more senior players who didn’t. Going in the right direction but we didn’t play well.

Nah, I’m not have that. I’m the No.1 England hater here and I hate that type of penalty but he sent the keeper the wrong way and sent it six inches wide. I won’t blame anyone who spent as little time on the pitch as him and is then expected to come on and score a penalty. Don’t blame they fella for trying to improve people’s lives.

Allardyce was the guy in charge before Southgate, you reckon we would have won with him? Or any of the last 4 or 5 England managers?

I think it's safe to say we're not gonna get any commentary lines from this match still being repeated 50+ years later. Jenas man. He's pure anaesthesia.

Where I’m at:

Fair play like, CT's lost some weight.

No chance Ryder has a lass 😉

Fake news. Here's the real photo.....

Wear a helly Hansen top or whatever they're called?

I think he found himself comfortable with a no frills win formation that won him matches against poorer opposition. Just as other managers did against shite opposition in qualification. It’s not my job to tell you who would be better but I’ve said all along that he was scared of playing your best attacking side. You were crying out for them for 75 minutes but weren’t given a chance.

Was just saying to my lass that I look forward to people slagging Rashford off for being too busy trying to feed poor kids than take penalties. Didn't think it would be this quick.

Which would be a relevant comparison if Bruce had taken us to a major final only to lose on penalties.

Hey Rio, it’s not a lottery. It genuinely isn’t. But don’t put Marcus Rashford on when he hasn’t played a single minute all tournament ( I think I’m right on that) and expect him to score. Something similar goes for Sancho. Penalties are about confidence but when you’ve shown no confidence in those players for the last month then don’t expect them to knock them in from six yards.

I'm not gonna criticise Southgate though. I honestly thought there was a chance we could get embarrassed by Italy. They've been the team of the tournament by a mile and we took them all the way to penalties with a young squad. Really enjoyed it and someone doesn't have to be to blame just cos we didn't win.

No shame for Rashford, Sancho and Saka. Saka got a bit of time but the other two played next to nothing. No time to justify themselves. A brilliant squad led by a moron. I’ll say it before the tabloids.

Good luck.

I predict I might be out of cans before kick off

The rest of Europe breathing a sigh of relief that the final is in London so they don’t have to put up with this shit.

If I don't look out the back, it's not happening. I'll know in the morning if my drive's covered in tab ends.

Barbecue next door resumed now?

Be awful if Branson's attempt to get into space didn't come off, wouldn't it? I mean I don't want it to explode or anything (mainly cos there are other people on board), just a high profile embarrassment where he has to come home with his tail between his legs.

My lad’s primary school have just sent an email saying kids can come in at 11am tomorrow. Head teacher is obviously getting mullered tonight

You can serenade her with conspiracy theories

go when they've got plug speaking mate. that's what I do.

Apparently only 10% of the public agree with removing all restrictions on July 19th. I can see them backtracking too. Lots of very senior medics publicly stating what a disaster this is going to be, and that will make it difficult for Boris and Javid to plead ignorance in the aftermath.

Space Jam was released in 1996 and we made the Euro Semi Finals. Space Jam 2 has dropped in 2021 and we've made the final. Hard to believe these two things aren’t linked.

> with the T-Rex in net I still maintain he was your player of the tournament but can't for the fucking life me work out what his strengths are. That's not a dig either. Looks the most cohesive and settled England team I've ever seen and and even though a few of his decisions cost your that Southgate seems a great man-manager and motivator and probably deserves another crack at it. > Thought we were shit an played our worst game (maybe Scotland). Hate to admit this as a Scot but a draw against Scotland basically assured youse were through before you even played the Czechs. Youse were never playing for the win and it was probably the sensible gameplan.

I'd strip his mbe off him for that run up

Ita a bit like saying Ohhh so you want rid of Bruce? WOULD YOU PREFER PARDEW?

Someone doesn't have to be to blame but Southgate is. That's two tournaments he's cost us, time to dissappear.

This bunch of lads have, in a few games, made me proud of country my way more than our shithouse politicians, ignorant population or anything else recently. It’s not the result we wanted, but they can be proud as fuck of their performance and behaviour throughout this tournament. Once they’ve got over the disappointment of this loss, they’ll look at the next tournament, a World Cup, and think “ We can have that”. I’d love to congratulate Italy, but I genuinely can’t celebrate their fucking shithouse style of cheating their way to victory - fuck them.

Or did it?

Dirty Italian cunt.

How the fuck do you run beer less than hour into your own teams cup final when you're watching alone?

Possession but not control. I KNOW YOURE READING THESE

Think the back 5 might work since I think these will fly out the blocks and we’re going to need to stifle them. It also means that we change to the four if need be. I also fancy Kane and Sterling to turn up. Believe, my man

The itv commentator told them to do it

This post goes so well with a fried egg and peas it’s uncanny.

"For an extra £25 you get a years free membership of the club 1892 help Mike buy a high street shop scheme." "What do I get?" "A free badge, a keyring and emails with 10% off vouchers to spend at selected sports direct shops." "Go on then!"