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:lol: The only mental health issue you have is that you refuse to accept your age. One of the older blokes at our Christmas do has had videos of him dancing sent around on WhatsApp and people talking about how sweaty he was on Teams all the next day. This is almost certainly what the young people at your work are doing with you too. "Did you see old man Gloom doing the fucking worm?! He is TRAGIC!" "Someone was saying he turned up on his skateboard and there's a video going round of him trying to do ollies in the car park." You've just got to go home as soon as the dessert plates are collected.

You could definitely do with a re-run cos it was Shay that pulled out Man United.

Love you really mate. Maybe 2023 will be the year when we can rightly say you got the hang of this cooking/dieting/football/politics lark ❤️

Been thinking on MF and his new career, can any helpful admin on here please give him this new avatar? Cheers.

What if … …we’re the cause?

Fish, the best cure for it is a dose of this place. I strongly DO NOT recommend become a full blown alcoholic for a couple of weeks, that is rather unpleasent.

I feel really lucky living where I live. Out the back of mine there’s relatively little light pollution. I love just looking at the night sky. Also I have what you might call rural walks, more or less on my doorstep too. I see roe deer over my back fence (and loads of other wildlife) almost every day. All less than 10 mins walk from a metro that’s a short journey to the coast and the centre of town. I doubt the view out the back is permanently going to stay all fields but it was almost certainly just what the doctor ordered these last few years from my pov.

I've got it! 14 tablets. I nearly screamed IIIIIIIIIITS CHRIIIIISTMAAAAAS in the pharmacy lass's face with excitement

“ So yeah, the guys at Metecting Club say it’s an early Roman offering cup for Mithras… “

Yeah, I’ve seen that one on his Etsy shop.

I think you’ve just been reading your birthday cake wrong all these years.

I love how everyone bitching about their mental health gets a sympathetic ear and I get a “grow up, Gloom”. Cunt

I must add, this is a private diagnosis and in no way related to my work in a professional capacity

So Japan airlines (ANA) ran a competition to design the livery for their Tokyo to Honolulu route, this was one of the entries (personally I think they should just for the giggles).

They are represented as notches on the gearstick

It will no doubt be a missing apostrophe somewhere

It's weird, but throughout the shit I've been through and put myself through this year, I've actually found just looking out at the stars - or actually more often the planets with the light pollution - incredibly calming. Just accept it, you're nothing in the scheme of things, just realise this fact and make peace with your mortality and insignificance. You were nothing before you were born, you are nothing after you die, and you are really nothing now. I suppose that's a variation on the small blue dot, I'll give it away for free without copyright.

Give Carl Sagan a credit at least, you cunt. Actually, he’s long dead, so fuck it it’s a nice philosophy though. Easier to adhere to when you’re comfortably off but worth trying all the same I reckon

The only one who cared and that's how you treat me

Anyway, that’s the last time I confide anything in you cunts.

Wait til you wake up tomorrow morning and remember typing this.

I get notifications on my phone whenever anyone spends on the joint account. My lass went to M&S to "pick up a few food things for over the Christmas" 20 minutes ago. Just had the notification that she's spent £188.77, the fucking lunatic. How the fuck am I supposed to get this acid under control?

Fuck knows, he's the swimmer dude. I've just had my first bit of Christmas cake. Two weeks of heartburn starts HERE.

Now you mention it, CT sent me a creepy personalised mug on my birthday...

Dave, hope you're doing alright, anxiety doesn't sound like much fun. Gloom, fucking GROW UP. Or at the very least tell us what you've been saying in these conversations you wake up tortured by, so we can all have a laugh.

I’ve had the fear loads lately. Too much Christmas partying. Too many mornings waking up racked with regret, tortured by the fractured memory of embarrassing conversations. I could do with growing up a bit and acting my age but I go through periods where I struggle to locate the off switch. All the other people my age end up getting the last bus home while I go on to the late bar or club with a bunch of 20 year olds, clinging on like David fucking Brent. Need a break from the binging but also a drink to get through the week of forced holiday with family. Bring on a quiet and dry(ish) January. Having the lurgy and not being able to train as much as normal is partly to blame as that usually keeps me well balanced.

You’ve not forgotten to delete your browsing history have you?

Fox, not KD

That’s warm for NZ. I know - don’t you start

I'll just use the pool thanks.

Well they only spent more than they’d ever spent before in the last window.

No, but Breakfasts have been a nightmare, I keep going for cereal, but open the cutlery drawer and

Need a Yorkie bar as your avatar, MF.

Chelsea spunking the cash again by the look of it. But that's OK I suppose with the southern biased media cunts

Man City don’t count. Proper club with proper fans. FTM

aye, fair enough! she undoubtedly cheated when she pulled out charlton.

bladecat editing metro man's post about the last surviving north east club in the league cup..... very, very badly. roker mackem and tynevalleyblackcat both liking it. where the fuck do they think abu dhabi is? europe? the profoundly and possibly terminally stupid cunts.

Don’t blame him.

Sorry to hear that HMHM, as the lads have said, you’re doing everything a mate could want. On a lighter note, I smashed my test. Drive was like a well lubed piston, slipping in to gaps with no trouble ( even got cut up by a cunt in a Beemer ). They gave me a Romanian hooker to despatch, and they’re notoriously feisty, but I recited Wearside Jack as I finished her off which I think sealed the deal. Happy Christmas to me

Mel agrees…

No doubt there'll be plenty of talk of FFP 🙂

Erm, congratulations. I think

Once a Geordie, always a Geordie. #SpeshulRelayshunship