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and so…taking a working class lad to a free bar in soho ISN’T a good idea….and I’ve realised I’m alcohol dependent and I’m going through medical treatment. its absolutely fucking horrible to admit but I’m at that stage now, very much at a crossroads i absolutely fucking love drink, but some things are more important and it’s time to get sober

Sounds like they had a lucky escape. They nearly ended up in Sunderland

Ultimately I’ve made the decision to be a musician rather than a drinker, that was what was on the table basically.

Saving Everton from relegation then saving a bus load of Pink fans from death. What a man.

Barella and Mad Dog seen leaving the Strawberry this evening. Mad dog is confident he is going to sign and was telling him all about Willockinho and former club legends such as Perchino. Maddison has admitted that he is scared of Mad Dog and likely won't sign. Heard it here first lads!

Sorry mate, just seen this now. Didn’t mean to upset you, I apologise.

THEN WHY DID THEY GET OUR FUCKING HOPES UP?!??!?!?!?!?

i back gemmill. the one thing he's good at is starting match threads just don't mention predictions

I see the usual suspects are out defending him.

What he meant to say was 'I couldn't have broken this record if Southgate had dropped me for no mark friendlies against Dentists and Farmers to test out other strikers. Cheers Gareth'

Neither is that kid's tache.

Some of us were visionaries, clearly

We should bid £25 million for Kane if that’s how Levy is operating

We should make an offer of £60m plus Isaac Hayden

Levy is a fucking pisstaker.

as well as having to listen to pink.

Apparently it was the cost of dribble bibs that put Ten Nonce off.

Looks like the bus driver must have been overcome by fumes from the dead marshes on the way to Mordor. Hope he recovers!

Paging Dr. @Monkeys Fist

I put my Les Paul through the walls of Jack white’s venue. jokes I didn’t actually do anything bizarrely, but we played a perfect show and I had one of the best nights of my life. I upset the other members of my band cause i was paralytic after the show, they were worried about the optics. So it came to a head…and ultimately I had to do some digging and realise I’m in the wrong. We’ve got about 30 more gigs this year…and they’ll all be free bars…am I gonna get mortal every time? I can’t just have one. So I best have none,

Atlético de Madrid is for sale and sooner rather than later the (illegitimate) owners will sell the club. I don't know if it will be very close that day, but the club is on sale. Morata's release clause is €10M Carrasco's release clause is €18M Griezmann's release clause is €25M

Still not as bad as Martin Tyler presenting Sergio Aguero as he left Man City his notes from the game they won the title and he went 'Agueeeeeeerrrrrroooo' or whatever as if it's in all time legendary status. The smugness on Tyler's face as he's handing it over and the bemusement on the Argentinian's is telling.

Nice to hear this is how the market is starting to perceive the club, and how we are operating.

mate, it's absolutely nothing to be ashamed of and has happened to everyone at one point or another. don't believe anyone who says otherwise.

They look thrilled with that pat on the head.

Clutching at straws like your SunderIreland tbh, ewerk.

Kane's dad is from Galway as well. Can you imagine Kane, Grealish, Bellingham, and Rice playing alongside Hendrick 😂 Mind you that lot along with Ferguson would make a very decent, to put it mildly, half a team at least.

Tbf, I could see Inter accepting the bid, or close to it, fairly quickly since they’re skint. The real job will be convincing him to come and keeping others off the scent now that it’s leaked

We only got beat by four teams last season and we play three of the cunts in our first three games

The former makes stuff up, the latter is fed what the club wants him to put into the public domain. That would be my guess anyway

We're all waiting on the inside scoop from our Italian football correspondent. C'mon, what's the news @PaddockLad

I didn’t know the Knight Ryder’s dad had a side-piece in Glasgow…

It’s clearly smoke and mirrors from nufc, feeding this to edwards while we are in Paris sealing the Mbappe deal.

I agree with Diego

This made me LOL tbf

Just post as Yates Wine Lodge for instant striker status. 👍

You're making the right call Tom, difficult as it will be to enact I'm sure you've got it in you! I haven't been properly drunk since a bit before the pandemic, couple of nuclear level hangovers stuck me firmly down on the 'not worth the grief' side and I've not looked back. Same boat as MF from the looks of it, have a couple and I'm done.

If I think too much about Barella and Bruno in the middle, I might just

Its incredible how these journos haven’t figured out that they’re just useful idiots yet.

keeping their options open until a better offer came along. standard top shaggers

We'll have no problem meeting the national home grown requirement for the CL, we only need eight players in the squad to have been developed in England. The issue we'll have is that four of those players need to have been trained by the club as kids and at the moment we only have two.

The SNP had the right idea though.

Why? Is it something to be ashamed of, even in this day and age?! Sadly a huge side effect of the anti-pyschotic drugs I was prescribed. I'd rather be alive and need medication than the alternative.

the brass neck on him. As if he wouldn’t have mentioned it