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I've got a load of the annuals still. My mam remains convinced they will one day be worth a fortune. I remember the Viz doing a skit of the Broons where the whole family was shitting it cos the kids reckoned the Granddad had said he was gonna have a fight. They gradually gathered everyone and hightailed it to his house, only to find he was having a shite.

Gemmill taking all this in his stride like....

A ruddy complexion. Significant rosacea on the cheeks. A number of thick black hairs sprouting on his nose (not from in his nose, ON that fucking thing). Bald on the top of his head, but sporting the classic hair horseshoe on the back and sides. Slightly cross-eyed. Nothing outrageous, just enough to make you keep checking over your shoulder when you're talking to him. I think that'll do. I nominate: @Howmanheyman To do a hatchet job on @PaddockLad

The scary thing is, if it was a reasonable price he'd have booked it.

Nothing more embarrassing than being at a gig and seeing three people in the same outfit as yourself.

Oh well I'm SO SORRY to hear there weren't enough immigrants to pick up litter for him! Was this Michael Vaughan you were talking to?

I'm sorry but Help ma boab. Here's me trying to foster the nihilistic phonetics of 90s Leith, and here's Blastronaut going post ww2 Dundee. Crivvens.

Well I've met PL but before I did I can't really remember what I thought he'd look like tbh? I'll go with.... "If the current semi-permanent Mrs PL phones up tell her am in attendance at ma workplace and no in the Dorset Airms having a swift one before leaving for ma flight frae Southampton airport to Newcastle for the game wi the Chelsea Ponces that they are."

Classic Sopranos bit. "the guy you're chasing, he was with the Interior Ministry. He killed 18 Chechen Rebels singlehandedly". "you're not gonna believe this. Guy was an interior decorator. He killed 18 Czechoslovakians" "His house looked like shit"

Aye, there was always something one of them had overheard that was misconstrued. For some reason it sticks in my mind that one of the “wee’ans” had heard Dapne’s new boyfriend (I think) was of Polish and French descent. Leading to much consternation as to what they should serve him when he came round for his dinner. Only for him to turn out to be a French Polisher

I used to love The Broons and Oor Wullie. My granny used to get the Sunday Post (which was quite common for that generation round here). Also used to get the annuals for Xmas. Iirc they alternated so it was Oor Wullie one year then The Broons the next. Same lot that did The Dandy / Beano etc iirc. D C Thomson, also of Thomson House fame, The Journal etc. laters, lol

Cheese pizza boxes and discarded ice cream tubs aahll Ower the shop now.

Everton’s lawyers will definitely be taking this approach. Well done Gemmill, you’ve guaranteed their survival yet again.

So it’s a one point deduction now?

Not you, Tom.

Ho Ho Ho, your mam, your sister, and your lass.

I think he looks like this Based purely on the fact I believe we were once in the mill house in Wardley many moons ago and the only person I vague remember seeing in there was a shifty character in the shadows that looked like this pic. I nominate @Gemmill to describe @ewerk

Nah, it was Gemmill’s pathetic attempt to start a chain thread a few weeks ago by humming a song to fucking Google or something .

Show me in your original post where you said to get those NEGATIVE 9 points added. I'LL WAIT.

It's a 9 point deduction. So you add it and OMG why am I having to explain this.

🙂

Maggie Broon. Absolute MILF

Well I for one will give it my best effort because, unlike every single other poster on here, I'm not A BIG CUNT.

I thought it had been done to some degree, but haven't got your detective skills of finding stuff in here from years gone by. Ewerk:

Funny that came up on my Twitter feed this morning.

I was the same, my mam would sometimes ask my dad to get the Sunday post when he went for the papers. I was just thinking about that Viz take on the broons.

Don't be sorry. Folk genuinely talk like that roon' here, ken? Speaking of Mel and Braveheart, one of the most universally loathed pieces of public art in Scotland once briefly took pride of place in the middle of my hometown. Check out this absolute monstrosity:

I said "get those 9 points added", CLEARLY referring to the NINE POINT DEDUCTION that was being reported. Rishi Sunak was right about the maths DIVS in this country. Now, it's public apology time for you. And this is the end of this matter.

FYP, aren't you supposed to be the math wizard?

My first thought was problems with his marriage, but his wife was all over Instagram with the kids at the last game. Whatever it is I hope it's not too serious

He wears a wasteman's hat.

I was at the pool earlier and needed a pee. Thought I'll just go up the deep end and do it. But the life guard still caught me. Fucker blew his whistle that loud I nearly fell in.

Should try the Village Hotel at Silverlink as that’s just round the corner from there 👍🏻

Archaeologists digging in a Pyramid in Egypt have found a Mummy covered in Chocolate and Hazelnuts. They believe it may be Pharaoh Rocher.

My Dad was basically a fascist and my mother always voted Tory and was a lifelong Mail reader. I'm 62 and am further left than I've ever been so sleep easy young Rents

It was a while ago now like lads

we’ve got a new Sean Casey on our hands here lads.

Well you need someone to keep you company

Gemmill at the petrol station: "Deduct negative 10 liters to the tank please. And I hope I wont have to explain BASIC MATHS here".

That’s Gemmill at his Billy Strings gig.

Aye, we ended up getting some food in the Strip Joint and stayed for the duration. Good tunes, good food and early 90s wrestling on the telly. QOTSA were something else, mind. Their last two albums may have been middling but as a live band, they’re at their peak of their powers

Daily mail= Shite.

Can he do match threads? Asking for a friend. 🙂