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It's not all plain sailing for him.

This story surely can’t be true, any self-respecting mackem would have mentioned the name of the bar and what ‘quarter’ of town it was in, what rare and expensive continental beverage he was savouring and mentioned the exact tasty, obscure local dish he was nonchalantly enjoying with his sister wife. Not to mention the fact that he would have windmilled the grayevy staiyend mag coont who dared speak to him while the locals cheered and the rest of the mags looked down humbly and respectfully at their pints of fosters.

The surrounding Spanish crowd cheering and applauding, doing Mexican waves and patting T-bone enthusiastically on the back "Nosotros tambien odiamos mags amigos, quiero decir, marra".

Gerrin.

Erm I think umm err I think erm

If he is still smashing grannies' back doors in, I sincerely hope they have their affairs in order.

Rough looking for 38 mind, but he didn't look much different 20 years ago.

Looks like someone dropped a Christmas ham on a barbers floor.

Had a canny weekend. Saturday saw my nephews and had a good laugh then went to friends for dinner where I was a climbing frame for their nippers. Sunday my wife was supposed to do a 10k run but the weather was shocking so she just did a run on the treadmill. I did a couple of hours on the bike and then we just chilled. Shes gone up to Aberdeen today for a few days with work. I have been out on the bike and its beautiful out there. Perfect temp, no wind, lush. I cycled past Bramham Park where they hold Leeds Festival. That was two weeks ago and they're still dismantling the stages etc.

Mrs wykiki enters the chat

Aye. I was reading about the Covid inquiry today, lots of testimony from NHS staff, patients and relatives of victims. All very good stuff, but the real inquiry should be in to how many BILLIONS of pounds were backhanded directly in the pockets of Tory donors/cronies/mates. To me, it’s the biggest UK crime so far this century and there doesn’t seem to be any great hurry to prosecute the cunts who perpetrated it.

I was reading there about Beyoncé not getting nominated for a Country Music Award but one of the people who was nominated was a singer who was ‘cancelled’ a few years ago for using the N word. After that radio stations stopped playing his songs and the record company dropped him etc but after the furore died down it all went back to normal. The interesting thing though was that immediately after the controversy broke his record sales increased 100% in the following week. This is the sort of people you’re dealing with.

To be fair, he was comparing Isak to prime Exile

It’s the lack of details and totally improbable outcomes that really make these RTG anecdotes so entertaining

And, as I was searching for the mackem logic gif on my phone, a reminder of genius Keith came up.

how many wanks have you had over that Kendzior lass. Be honest here. Anyway I'm talking about if he loses, the Republicans are fucked. If he wins, everyone's fucked.

And when the usual suspects complain about the rich leaving etc etc fuckin bombard them with stuff like this. What’s gone on in the last 14 years wasn’t so much ideological as much as opportunistic…a massive transfer of public money into the back pockets of a tiny few. That fuckin wanker Sunak given his background unsurprisingly being a major instigator of it and just waving it all through when he got the top job. He and others involved should be fuckin properly investigated. And if it gets awkward for Starmer so fuckin what? https://amp.theguardian.com/politics/article/2024/sep/09/tory-covid-contracts-worth-15bn-had-corruption-red-flags-study-finds

Spaniel is fucking useless

He looks like he's been wiping his arse with his face.

I once knew a girl who had one leg shorter than the other. Eileen She had a sister who didn't have one leg shorter than the other. Noleen.

Wow, he was really committed to his hobby.

Keith is officially a sad mackem bastard.

Anyway, back in after a lovely birthday night and that MLF tale has just rounded it off nicely as I sit listening to music on YouTube with a glass of red. Get in.

right up there with lewis carroll smoking a shit load of opium and writing alice in wonderland that little tale is.

Ted Cruz is about as uncharismatic a candidate as you could choose. Vance was supposed to be the successor and he stinks the place out at the rallies. Trump is a unique character. He's a non career politician, bizarre product of the 80s. Basically a TV character, genuinely funny, he chats wild shit, tells provable lies, and gets away with all of it. I really don't think that's gonna be very easy to replace.

The ones that Geordie Bangers do are like a Boxing Day turd wrapped in pastry… Glorious!

Not surprising really as he's only about 2 inches high on the telly.

Just been for some food with the wife as I cba cooking. Sat waiting for dinner and a massive wave of emotion just hit me and I started to cry I read at lunch about Rub Borrow's bairns doing something at the new MND centre in Leeds in tribute at their father. It popped in my head at dinner and I was going to tell the wife and then this emotion just hit me. Fuck me, the menopause has hit me early.

Newsagents on it today. I try not to think about it. I mean, we had Johnson, but the system and people in this country ultimately worked and turfed him out on his arse. Trump though? I just cannot get my head round why anyone would vote for that putrid mess, even before considering the threat to democracy, no, the end of democracy, he represents.

I don't think he's ever been deliberately funny. It's all weird nicknames and bizarre boasts. Some of this shit he comes out with is funny because it shows how dense he is, or how impossible fragile his ego is. But then, I'm laughing at him, not with him.

I see Paddocklad is moonlighting on TMS today, which one is he though ? 🤷‍♂️

Just watched it. Yeah, it’s absolutely ripe for their treatment. Peebles has such a weird look. He’s one of those you completely forget about until you hear his pop-tastic radio 1 voice. Peter Powell was a cheesy fucker too, but he looks a million dollars stood next to Peebles. Bar Heaven 17 at the start it’s another one with some excellent stuff in the charts that doesn’t make the show. You can see the professional dancers in the crowd sticking out a mile as well. It’s worth watching just for Ryan Paris performing Dolce Vita. He looks so uncomfortable special mention to Paul Young’s backing singers and their moves too

having barely featured on the beebs gossip column the entire time the transfer window was actually open, we're now never off it. antony from man utd now joining guehi (yawn) and elanga as january targets. very clearly mitchell providing the leaks here in a vain attempt to make himself look less of an incompetent thundercunt. but you can't fool me and hopey, no siree.

To be sure

Cheers lads. You're all right of course. It was a bit of a dry bumming but if everybody is dry bummed equally I'd give myself a 50/50 chance. I doubt that's the case though as I am sure they recruit from within. And yes. It's a learning exercise. I'm a slow learner when it comes to this though. This is the third fucking time I have been asked a question about how I have actively promoted equality and diversity now, and I still haven't bothered researching an appropriate answer. It appears "well, I enjoy watching lesbians with strap ons go for it" maybe isn't the correct answer?

Probably not helpful, but my attitude whenever something like this happens is you did your best, and it really is just a job. You've still got all the stuff that really matters. Don't let a bad job interview mess with your head or make you feel bad about yourself, especially not given the circumstances that this one came bundled with. Let them hire some other dickhead if they like. And you never know, you might think this went a lot worse than they did.

Have you got a laptop with you, @Renton? If you're gonna have to try and pull slides together the night you get back, I can help get stuff into PowerPoint before then for you if you send me slide outlines and content. You'll probs still have to fuck about with it, but at least you're not starting from scratch.

Makes you think

She's probably laughing with you on mute given the wanker sign in front of her colleagues.