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Seriously though, how are you not a divorcee?

Keegan and Howe, whilst vastly different in terms of personality and methods, are both in the same bracket for me as far as club standing is concerned. Keegan’s managerial achievements here are rightly revered- it was his first management job, and he took us from the brink of oblivion to the brink of ecstasy. It can’t be overstated how he utterly transformed this club -yes, SJH’s money was a necessary factor, and he deserves some credit, but without Keegan none of it would have happened. The sheer joy and pride he instigated, not just in the club but about the city in general, was incredible and we’re still reaping the benefits of it. Given the precarious position we were in when he came, to do it by employing a stingy, defensive approach would’ve been eminently sensible and understandable. But, no - fuck that! He virtually wrote the definition of cavalier football- “ ATTACK ATTACK ATTACK!” Ultimately, for a multitude of reasons, he didn’t get us that elusive trophy we absolutely deserved under him, but… … It doesn’t matter. His place in our history is assured and thoroughly deserved. I fucking love the bloke. Eddie came in with the club in a similar situation at first- The Cabbage had sucked any joy out of both the fans and the players, and we were only heading in one direction- that’s not even open to debate. The joy of the takeover was very much tempered by the stench of Bruce stinking up the place, until he got ditched. If we’re honest, most of us were probably a little underwhelmed when Eddie was announced as gaffer, and the players he inherited were so unfit, uninterested and uncoached it’s no surprise he struggled to get the first win under his belt, but then… …in four months from him taking over, he got us 20 points from 14 games, finished 11th, becoming the first team in PL history not to be relegated having not won their first 14 games. Like Keegan, he gave us back the pride and the joy of not only our club, but our city. He’s done it differently, but no less remarkably- his transformation of BUJ07 from a figure of ridicule in to FUCKING THANOS remains for me his greatest achievement so far, but he’s gone about transforming the club, the players, our style, our respect and standing, and crucially, our expectations in a manner that no one else but Keegan has done. The thing that excites me about Howe is that I totally believe his best is yet to come with us. Keegan’s place in our hearts is cemented in and assured, Howe’s has absolutely rock-solid foundations but is still being built on. And I fucking love the bloke.

This

I don’t care if there are an infinite number of multiverses happening right now. In none of them does Miggy score with his right foot.

Adrian Mole?

"If yi take 50 of yi English pennies down to the paper shop on glebe street in forest hall and use them in exchange for the Ronald Gill esquire publication then yill found how it went down at the place where they once built spitfires. If yi want to read shit hot quality NUFC reports by the man they all want to read, yours truly, then yi need to help pay his wages like one Kevin Keegan was once helped by that famous institution of Tyneside, Newcastle Breweries."

Will miss him. Favourite Miggy moment. Middle of his hot streak where everything he hit with his left was going in, Spurs away Joelinton bows to polish his boot...Miggy the gormless twat lifts his right foot up. Joey's reaction like, "not that foot man you daft twat".

@AlexI didn't want you feeling left out so here you go. I asked for a scene with a white Chuck D recovering from a hangover (with a wooly hat on, your famous hangover cure). I asked for the Border Terrier and for your wife to be a "white version of Flavor Flav" just to continue the theme. She's annoyed that you're hungover, as per the brief. This is what I got, and when I asked for it to make your face clean shaven, you retained the beard AND your wife turned black, so this is as good as it gets.

We ought to be getting TV updates quicker then. 👍

It used to mean being aware of social injustice. Now it just means "anything I dont like"

Indeed

probably initiated a better use for the redundant transfer thread.

Not sure who the journo is but I think we’d all like to buy Marco Silva a pint for this little exchange (from about 2.50)

Im not a murdering evil man.

6 years after we lost our infant girl inexplicably to SIDS, the missus and I welcomed a baby boy today. Absolutely elated and terrified in equal measure

Did you just quote yourself. Wow

Or Bournemouth are the real deal.

Isak with a fantastic improvised shoulder pass to Gordon. Efan Ekoku: ‘Mis-controlled by Isak, it just bounces off his chest’

You go to take a quick shite and they score ffs wait a min

Reported

What a fucking ball Sandro. Now enjoy your loan spell

Drove home, got a lift back along from my daughter when she finished work about an hour later and when I walked in the back garden it was gone. I started laughing and they casually said..... "It was a bit too windy so we just took it down."

Reminds me of this.

Bridget Jones

Anyone seen Ant lately? #justasking

If you could explain to me exactly what that means or why its a problem though I'd appreciate it.

You post your team sheet today and watch me come down on you like A TON OF BRICKS.

If it actually does stop them rebuilding for the 100th time post Ferguson, you’ll sharp see things change with PSR. Unfortunately, they’ll just flog Rashford to Saudi for 100 million and they’re laughing. Until they inevitably fuck it up again and we have this conversation in 3 years

First poster to name all on stage gets a weeks cycling holiday with Wykiki this summer. 2nd prize is two weeks 😃

Got a coke nail on his little finger

Someone Gloom has the horn for

He has no interest in beer, just looking to show off his parquet flooring again.

Keegan is number one and always will be. Love Eddie and think he could be the perfect manager for this club now but KK's first two full seasons were something else, he was also ruthless with players when he wanted an upgrade. The club we have today isn't there in if there's no Keegan, it's as simple as that. Even in his half season at the beginning he called Hall's bluff about the money as he had that pull and leverage, the absolute wasteland we were in as a club cannot be understated, it's a daft thing but I think it our filth win in a row in the promotion year where in a two nil v Luton my breath was taken away with the kind of football which only months earlier would have been unthinkable, the way his team just laughed at the new back pass rule whilst others were genuinely doing re-enactments early twentieth century keystone cop acts was another thing I loved, the way he ruthlessly sold his top scorer to get Beardsley who he knew would be perfect for his relatively unknown signing Andy Cole was genius, still to this day the PL's most successful goalscoring partnership, (not that you'd know it by sky), to escape relegation to the third, to piss the league the year after then third in your first season back whilst playing brilliant football was a joy to see, he never moaned about refs, never moaned full stop, always gave credit to the other team and was the perfect ambassador for the club, we were in the doldrums and then it was champagne style. Like I say, NUFC now isn't possible without KK.

Is that all in your conservatory? Your wife must be a saint. And it must look like Blackpool to the neighbours when the pinball wizard is doing his stuff.

🎵 Aaaaahaaaa, Marmooshka, Marmooshka, Marmooshka, aaiaaah 🎶

Looks like Miggy was whiling away the minutes on the bench scrolling through TT.

The first touch passes from Isak and Gordon The finish from Sandro

What a fucking team goal.

Cunt of a commentator couldn't wait to link Isak to Arseshite. Fuck you commentator, fuck you......

I watched Early Doors again and it really is a treasure. I love how the first episode is pretty much just establishing the characters. Not a chance the BBC would allow for that sort of patient writing anymore

Sounds good to me.

Agreed. But then you’re got Eddie parking his car over the water meter manhole at Dean Court to stop the ground being cut off when they were staring relegation to the conference in the face….hes very largely responsible for taking that club to the premier league in 5 seasons…. Theyre very different personalities and wildly different in regards to their playing careers but they are both the most important figures in the modern history of each club…

So, a serious post. I've just been playing about with this for, you know, my actual work. So part of my job is to do in depth critical appraisal of medical literature. Usually this takes me 1 to 2 hours per paper. I just uploaded a paper I am very familiar with. It has done in 30 seconds what it would take me to do in 2 hours. And it has done a superb job, even spotted some things I missed (but missed some thing I spotted also, for balance). I feel both excited and terrified by this. On the one hand, this can save me a lot of effort and even more time for making funny pictures. On the other, it's potentially massively deskilling and I can see it leading to mass redundancies, very quickly. The thing is, I have 20 years experience contextualising this stuff, I genuinely think my knowledge and experience is crucial for applying the work of ChatGPT to the bigger picture. Very few people and none of the kids I work with have this skillset, and CHatGPT is already FAR superior to them in this specific task, as well as being x500 faster, I am already questioning their utility. But also, I'm expensive and my American employers know the price of everything and the value of nothing. A familiar story and scary as fuck. Honestly, if it can already operate at this level in such a niche subject, I don't know where the future jobs are coming from.