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Still looks more mobile than Callum currently does.

Bit harsh. I was only giving my opinion.

Start my new job today. Bricking it.

As long as he’s happy to play second fiddle to Isak then he gives us another option off the bench.

I give it a week and a half, so 7 working days, before Yorkshire Happiness has called one of his new colleagues a cunt in here Good luck with it Wykiki.

We’ll have to agree to disagree. Anyway, I’ve just about hit my yearly quota of contributions to this thread. I’m off to watch an instructional video on pipe fitting basics before getting my head down. “ Latina Ho Separates Her Flanges”.

Is that a rhetorical question?

Took the kids for a late lunch in Berwick on a trip up there a few years ago. They wanted Pizza so we ended up in a place called Limoncellos just down from the Main Street. Were seated, menus dumped on the table, and we waited for someone to take our drinks order. And waited And waited. 20 minutes later I physically grabbed a waiter passing our table and gave our drinks order. Drinks came 10 minutes later, dumped on table, no food order taken from us though. Again, after a daft wait, I grabbed a waiter and gave them our food order. Over an hour later the food turned up! Mine came first, mussels in tomato and chilli , on spaghetti. Over half of them were closed, so before the waiter had time to fuck off, I pulled him and pointed out that half my dish was inedible. He said, “ No, it’s fine, you can still eat them “ I disagreed, strongly. The daft cunt stuck with his idiocy and when he realised I wasn’t budging, he picked out several of the dead ones and opened them with a spoon, offering them to me to smell. Yes, that’s right, the fucking dodge pot STUCK HIS FINGERS IN TO MY PASTA and fished out about three of the dead ones I just looked at Mrs. F who gave the sideways “let’s fuck off” nod, just as the rest of the food arrived. Up we got, I ushered the family out, then told boyo that if he hadn’t stuck his clammy paws in my meal, I’d have waited for a fresh one, but since he did, he could take the whole lot back and fucking whistle for the round of drinks.

Not my story but a lad I used to play football with worked in the shipyards and when it was all going tits up he got some work in Barrow in furness and stayed in a B&B where the owner supplied their bait as part of the rate. First day they opened it up and it was cold chip shop fish and chips from the night before in sandwiches.

"James, James" "Yes Mr Farnon" "Look, look, it's a bad case of Lycra, get me my gun" "At once Mr Farnon" "Hurry man, it's getting away, we can't let it spread"

Depends on what your club badge is.

Unwrapped thread, easier read I think https://skywriter.blue/pages/did:plc:d3z4gcd2zjj7uo43lv7icqsk/post/3lqlfd5shj22g

It's a shame because he is clearly a good player, but I maintain that anyone choosing Man U over us (or quite a lot of other teams) currently is self-sorting into the "not worth our time" basket. Yes top players will always back themselves to succeed but they're picking a sinking ship because it was good a decade ago, they're either thick as pig shit or have terrible greedy advisors around them and we don't need that. There are other players.

We’ve been linked with him but that’s not to say there was anything actually in it.

We can sugar coat this all we want, but we've been linked with him for 6months and we've lost out on him to a team that finished 16th and isn't in Europe. It's been a dismal start to the window and we've got no clue who is leading on transfers.

Were the fuck are Man Utd getting this money from? It’ll be over a £110m for Cunha and Mbeumo.

What’s the worst food you’ve had served up to you? ( Post piss-up kebab nonsense doesn’t count- they’re always dire) When I was working fitting ductwork, we went to the site canteen at Addenbrookes on the first day to try it out. “ Meat Pie, Chips and Peas” Hmm, I’ll ask what meat it is, what’s the worst that it could be, thunk I. Asked- “ It’s just meat pie luv” Oh -oh! Served up, looked fairly standard site canteen fare, chips were obviously cooked in old oil as they were dotted with black bits, but I thought “ Had worse…” Sat down, cut the pie open, and as I was thinking the exact same thing, the lads sitting next to me said “ What the fuck is that?” Chunks, not cubes, chunks that had just been hacked off, of pale pink, slimy looking pork luncheon meat (cheap Spam), we’re looking back at me in a pool of instant gravy. But that wasn’t the worst. It should have been on the menu as “Mixed Meat Pie” In equal amounts to the pink chunks, were crispy edged slices of what was clearly at least yesterday’s kebab meat, that had been sitting in the hot tray all day after being carved off… … then hoyed in with its pink mate to make this fucking abomination- no onions or other superfluous veg to get in the way of whatever the fuck this “meat” combo tasted like either. It looked like a meat version of Rocky Road Chocolate slice, Took it back to the counter and asked for a refund and the cheeky cunts said there nothing wrong with it! I said “ Ok then, if there’s nothing wrong with it, you have a bite of it, otherwise I’ll have my money, thanks.” Refunded.

Good luck mate, if they ask you to go and get a long stand or a sky hook, they're taking the piss 😉

Excellent thread on potential targets. https://bsky.app/profile/editkev.football/post/3lqlfd5shj22g

Booo!

Honestly I’m not going to piss my pants over “targets” we don’t even know were really on our radar.

NUFC full steam ahead on the transfer business behind the scenes at SJP....

Once went into a Chinese on Low Fell after a Friday night skinful. Asked for curry and chips and, to this day, I have no idea what they gave me but it wasn’t curry. It had the colour and consistency of a baby’s sick and had a taste equivalent to a baby’s shite. It was that bad and toxic, I had to have about 4/5 mouthfuls just to try and figure out what I had received. The place shut about 3 weeks later and it had to be on the health inspectors command

Who’s this cunt?

I’ve seen a subtitled version of the first video, the owld Russian lad is swearing like a trooper! “ Oh fuck me, another one!” ” The fucking police are fucking shooting at it… fuck me, they’ve fucking missed!”

Not anymore he won’t. Zelensky gave Putin a proper spanking with their outstanding coordinated drone strike on Russia’s bomber fleet. Reading that many of the planes he destroyed can’t be replaced as they’re no longer in production, even parts for repair are rarer than a washed mackem. This is Zelensky today, shaking hands with Russia’s Head of Security Service and giving him a “fuck you” grin

Couldn't agree more

Chris Harris scared the shit out of him running him round a racetrack in a 911 a wee while back, that was a laugh.

She looks about 12… Get thee south 12 miles , sharpish

It’s a better strip than the one it’s based on

Happy Monday Morning campers. I know it's Monday and we are all worried about Wykiki and how long he will last in his job before calling someone a c*nt, but let me share with you a short from my new favourite YouTube channel. This lad knows how to enjoy life. And who can blame him? Not often you get to see and, more importantly, hear a double headed class 56 combo in central London. 👍 https://youtube.com/shorts/xsYqVVHDoFQ?si=ODB83vjDiN0Bvy78 Damn, won't let me embed shorts!

👍

Reading that I'm not sure if I'm having one of my funny turns tbh?

No way is he linked as the 100 million man rumours.

God bless real ale bullshitters, if it wasn't for them I wouldn't have got a job with S&N in the 90s and probably would've had a poorer lifestyle/house. Right place, right time.

Fernandes to Saudi for £100m+ most likely

Aye Wykiki I dont come on Gen Chat much. but hope the cunts at yer new place of work are ok and the new job works out well!.

They were still there waiting decommissioning when I worked there in 2013 😆 Vanguard class are due for the chop soon, some Dreadnought class already in service I think..

If it truly is psychic super-powers, don't let them medicate it out of you until you've helped me uncover the identity of Zowie Fenderblast. People have to know! More seriously, look after yourself man! You'll be driving again before you know it. I used to work for a guy (who incidentally married into my extended family) has what sounds like a far more extreme form of epilepsy and still is able to drive on the daily. Make the most of the break from driving responsibilities. There's a lot to be said for Uber, home deliveries and pints at lunchtime. And while Uber and delivery drivers are clearly being exploited, you conscience is clean because it's just a temporary measure and those fuckers can still drive.

Tried that under Fat Mike iirc....

You've told this story before mate.

Even the first sentence is ironic

I reckon we probably lose to Everton, but Man United beat Villa, possibly after their goalkeeper gets sent off. Wouldn't be surprised if there's a contentious decision that Villa won't shut up about either. Just a feeling I've got. Let's see what happens.