adios

I was kind of blaming Charnley for this fiasco but Barnes coming in and interfering has Ashley written all over it.

Serious holes at LB and #10 but enough to stay up...if Rafa stays.

Think I'm going to go watch a horror movie now to cheer me up.

Yep. He's said as much; only reason he'll see out the season.

No one gives a fuck. Not even the dizzying heights of a joke club anymore.

Don't know why everyone's panicking when there's 26 minutes left.

Given his comments thus far, I think he'll see the season out. The really scary thing is, it's well within the realms of possibility that he'll walk and Pardew will come back. I think I'd be done then.

I think this is the bit concerning most of us.

And replaced with Messi.

It's all a big prank lads, £80m spent in the next 3 hours.

There's still time.

Goodnight.

#suicidewatch

Being unemployed sounds fucking awesome.

I suspect we're all on the same page as troops now. I'm just glad I've been drinking since midday.

Embrace the suffering.

Well, I'm gutted.

Found our level tbh.

Looks like Targett will be signed. Yay!

5 hours.

Joselu is a fucking legend and will outscore Big Al.

If it's true, it's interesting as it means there's money there regardless. Or Ashley's just selling everyone for a laugh...

Gayle for Cairney?