Jonny_nufc

It was good out in town tonight..... they played 'Spirit in the Sky' and everyone was buzzing I joked, ''the spirit of the lord is indeed high in the sky and one day we will meet him... but there are certainly some high spirits here too tonight'' ... and everyone was in hysterics

Went in to work today via the shop (sneaked in 2 mins late ) with a carton of Ocean Spray Cranberry and Orange juice. I said does ''anyone want some?'' Girl who sits to my right said... ''whats wrong with it then?''... I said ''nothing... but it was reduced''... she said '' re-juiced... does that mean it was a bit dry''.... I said ''no silly! it was reduced to 69p '' ... the point being that she thought I said ''re-juiced'' instead of ''reduced'' as if such a word exists ... she didn't have any anyway. I didn't dare ask her if she wanted any dried apricots later on

"Fuck me, catmag's chopped me ears off!" 78437[/snapback]

I took one look at it this morning and decided it was a wind-up, I wasn't sure until I got to the word 'Warhammer', then I was convinced. 78123[/snapback] I thought everyone on here played Beers, Football, Clubbing, Warhammer, Church.... in that order

Does anyone know whether there's an online auction site where I can search for a variety of items and make bids.... with the aim of buying something. I'd prefer one which is used my millions of internet users, where I could use payapal Any advice.... cheers.

I have to say, Lou, that the crytalised ginger is the only thing that worries me about this little lot. If he's winding us up then but I will smack him though! 78204[/snapback] I can confirm it was a piss take A successful 1 at that, 5 pages

i feel confident now. Its all down to you,

Hang on, I'll write this down. I was thinking about casually dropping in to the conversation that I drink more than the recommened 2 litres of water a day and at least seven portions of fruit and veg, then offering her my tupperware box filled with sunflower seeds, dried fruit, nuts etc.. What dya reckon Lou?

There's this girl I like at work and I'm having a few problems getting anywhere with her I've tried to impress her. I baked some scones a fortnight ago and brought her some in and as far as I know she enjoyed them, but I didn't see her eat them Next, i decided to be a bit sneaky I brought in the previous day's Times crossword having picked up the answers that day, and I sat in the staff room during lunch time, reading the clues out loud and getting them straight away... ... bit dishonest I know but you have to play the game eh So thinking she had me down as a cross between Einstein and Jamie Oliver, I decided to go one step further and I burnt her my ELO CD so she could have a copy. I just flung it out on her desk and said.... 'hey, here are some tunes for you to listen to' ... but even though she says she likes the CD, she doesn't name any of the songs So then I decided to ask her out for an ice-cream one lunchtime but she doesn't like ice-cream ... i said never mind, lets go for a meal one evening but she's always busy. She says she goes shopping 4 nights a week ... maybe then I should wait for her in the supermarket ? Anyway, my last hope is inviting her round for a game of Warhammer but that will mean introducing her to all the lads and she's going to think we're a bunch of psychos Help needed ... and I've already bought her a box of crystalized ginger and that didn't work

Good reply Sorry

Are you actually trying to be funny or controversial on this issue? I really dont appreciate your piss poor attempts to try and get some mileage out of the link I posted. I saw the link posted elsewhere, and felt sick to the pit of my stomach. The idea that they are allowed to march around and post this stuff with no comeback is something I simply cannot fathom, hence I shared the link. So be careful about trying to get a laugh or cause a stir by even hinting nonce shit in my direction.

Could you imagine a march by a group of fucking nonces in the UK, with banners promoting sex with kids. They'd be torn apart limb from limb.

http://216.220.97.17/ WARNING- DO NOT CLICK IF YOUR BLOOD IS LIKELY TO BOIL All words fail me, and it IS NOT A WINDUP http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NAMBLA

Excellent point mate, never thought of that.

Have Cheltenham or Chester got terraces?

I went out, had a good night aswell surprisingly

Glad i didnt go like.

My tip is.... Dot from Eastenders Middle runners are... Maggie Thatcher Pete doherty Outsiders.... The Queen Gazza (suicide)

Im going to a house party now which is alreet. no restrictions on bad behaviour. one of those bring a few drinks for the table with you, which to me means, take a couple of cans, drink them myself and then start on everyone elses supplies. sure there will be plenty of other substences flying about and who knows, maybe even an orgie. and as always the resident cunt (that knowone likes, and knowone seems to admit they were the one to invite him) and his cunting mates turn up, which always leads to a fight then its zzzzzzzz on the settee covered in my own vomit probably. all in all a great night

NYE is just another amateur night full of once a year 4-pint wankers and twats you're glad to not have seen for 12 months,all the boozers,be they top of the range or old-man local charge a fortune to get in,despite your weekly loyalty,the local kebab houses become even more like fight club then usual,if you can get a taxi it's at least double fare,there's always some cunt on your estate letting off fireworks all night waking every fucker up,you wake up on NYD feeling not only like shit but also with the grand sum of £1.48 in your sock,you have loads of texts from twats you don't like wishing you well or slags you hate saying "why the fuck did you ring me at 3am you wanker,no i dont love you" and it's only 3 days max til you go back to work and listen to all the arseholes ther go on about their party and how they intend to give up drink/smoke/food/living,if you wokr with fat birds they festoon the office with bottles of evian and packets of ryvita,it's still cold ou0t and it's too long til you piss off to greece or wherever for your holidays,which you canmt afford anyway due to all the money you blew at xmas Happy New year.

We used to enjoy sticking massive stones/rocks in snowballs and throwing them late at night at cars in treachous weather ......... trying to make them crash or skid at the very least Anyone else? Got a family car with 5 people to roll over once ........ sort of stopped then Had to make do with targeting old folk or anyone walking by as I used to hide behind a wall of a main road and do it Hung up my snowball around 15 I think Anyone use to ungrit the paths of the local old peoples home then give them marks out of ten if they made it to the end of the path whilst still staying on there feet? Used to love Snow

keirondyerfanclub, graemeisamazin