McFaul

Aye ahaha. Here being the real ale/Tyne valley enthusiast type of kid you are, I think you'd really like The Wellington like, it's only 150 yards from Riding Mill station, MUCH better than anything in Wylam and I absolutely love Wylam. I'll give it a blast, cheers man. I was out with my old boss last week, and apparently it's his best mate that owns the Boathouse as well. Aye got mesel quite paranoid cos OBVIOUSLY that's on the way home, so had a quick pint, and the manager said aye "you're the lad that had the problem with the seat I didn't apologise properly for that" and give us our drinks on the house. A nice touch I thought to be fair, but it got me thinking mebeez some cunt off here, or pal of a pal who I mentioned it to has told him.

This kid is such a doilum. By the way gbaby you're right.

Aye ahaha. Here being the real ale/Tyne valley enthusiast type of kid you are, I think you'd really like The Wellington like, it's only 150 yards from Riding Mill station, MUCH better than anything in Wylam and I absolutely love Wylam.

I can't even remember what the monthly payment was man, I filled it in at the match during a game, I just remember the lads sayin aye late June. I think am looking forward to this season more than any since 03/04 by the way.

Hey I've been in there at least 50 times in my life! One time a 70 year old woman was sick on my shoe. did y pick her teeth out of it and hand her them back ? Haha, fuckin lovely pair of suede adidas gazelle's ruined there was four of us and a was the cunt nearest her, shes sick on me shoe pure black, blue gazelle me pride and joy, me mate gans reet one more in here, and she gans will you get me a half of best scotch lover al pay ye back next week. If it was anyone other than an old lady ad have been 10 times more fumin than I was.

Hey I've been in there at least 50 times in my life! One time a 70 year old woman was sick on my shoe.

Bit up itself is it? Nar but it's nee "Newton" where the likes of yee turn oot.

Been in the wellington @ riding mill today, food lush portions for cunts like Magma and Kevin though not fat cunts like me, but they do 3 house ales i had one of them and it was lush. Sorry i cantr be more specific, definitely a classsic nice dat sunday pub, but if youre even vaguely bampy - dont go

What a shite way to go. RIP

I'd fuckin carry him there fo yiz.

I lost me debit card yesterday, or I'd check at the cashpoint, but yeez on this ten year deal, has the first payment been taken it's due about now?

41:00 onwards for 3 or 4 minutes is legendary. If there was an Olympics for swearing he'd absolutely piss the gold every time. This was about 4 years ago now, me mate who's in the OB says he's gone completely straight now.

in other words . . "who wants t gan n see a tossin wattafaall like!?" pmsl ye naa what it is when yee were a youngun there was this North South divide, more than noo even, and that cunt who went chasing them oot the river epitomised it. The way hes trout. Trrrrrrrrrroyywwwt" I wish Oz was my pal like. Never be nee one like him again. and the bit in the local after "ah you're still here are y ? . . wWITH ya stool !?" went on an Oz youtube jaunt just before after y'd mentioned it and has us creased like . this best of man . bits "agga bloody do?!" and "tonight im ganna love someone t deatth" Its one of the few things in life that can make me belly laugh mate. Aye when he kicks the duke box in here ye are ye naa what makes me laugh, "right where wu gan the neet then" and he asks that every neet, La Franais is a cunt, but a genius.

in other words . . "who wants t gan n see a tossin wattafaall like!?" pmsl ye naa what it is when yee were a youngun there was this North South divide, more than noo even, and that cunt who went chasing them oot the river epitomised it. The way hes trout. Trrrrrrrrrroyywwwt" I wish Oz was my pal like. Never be nee one like him again.

Mate Euthanasia would be a thing of the past if they played "Clocks" in to every room in an old peoples home cos they'd just fuckin top themselves wi nee assistance

Mate tell me what you know about South Korea, then tell me what you know about North Korea, there's big differences between those two countries, but am tellin ye this now, the differences are a lot smaller than what they are between Newcastle upon Tyne and Sunderland, you fuckin filthy parafin.

Oh dear. In the mornin will yous wake up and think fuck me that was a good 2 hours of my life, watching a shite music artist sing out of tune with 200,000 crusties in a field pretending that it's something important. No one cares. I'd rather watch a re run of Auf Wiedesehen Pet myself.

Ye naa the worst thing about playing football at 33, ye brain knows exactly what to do, but ye body just doesnt give you everything you want nee more. Obviously worse again when you get to 39/40. Me brother in law still plays at 43 good player (but a mug) and he says its like running through treacle. It's canny sad really.

The old boiler haha never seen her, its mad a seen the chinese bloke and a thought good lad havin a pint in a pub, before ya mate even mentioned him, yed never see some cunt oot the mosque dee that. That was before ur mate even mentioned him. Aye I was in The Anson last year, and some lass was on her phone aside me at the bar, and she went "Gemma am ganna fokkin bat you all over when a see ye!!!!!" Divvint think al be gan there again.

I love U2 but why ppl sit roond a telly watchin them play live baffles me. I love their music, but noo just chuck it ur old and shit. Bono is an egotistical look at me mug too.

Nar av telt ye a wouldnt swap the west end for the east end, but ad swap the people. My blood is east end. See last year the lad who lives aside yee who fucked off before ye got there, we took the full June off work for the WC n he was sayin come doon the powder monkey every other day cos its a pound a pint wish a had've noo. That blonde barmaid was WELL friendly is she like that with every cunt, or just 16st cunts from the west end?? Was impressed though that he could recognise I was a west end kid, your accent is definitely more refined but some doon there are proper fuckin charva's like ye have to be honest.

I'm going to sound like a miserable bastard, I probably am in all honesty but I couldn't think of anywhere I'd less like to be now than stood oot in the pissin' rain watching U2 with loads of hippys and 'cool dudes' jumping about in a confined space. Then when the beautiful concert has finished you get to trek through 4 foot of shite and try to sleep in a drug induced haze in a 2 man tent with 5 randoms in. No thanks, I'll just watch parts then fuck off to my waam bed and get on the nest. Never been one for festivals etc, kind of wish I was 'cos it's probably amazing just not for the likes of me. Thats very much like me. I almost feel like I'm missing out but the reality was, at a time in your life when all this gets into your bloodstream I was 100% NUFC obsessed, not so much the team but the match going, the singing, the surges down the terraces, the banter, the atmosphere, going away to different cities and exploring and getting up to daft things kids do then going back to school on a monday feeling smug as fuck and thinking the rest of the kids hadn't a fucking clue. Going to a concert would've been pretty much a 2nd best experience back then and also the fact was that music wouldn't have moved me as much, and if it did that doesn't mean I'd want to go to a concert. That and the fact that the charts were full of Stock, Aitken and Waterman didn't probably help, like. Funny enough I caught a bit of the U2 bit last night by accident and I thought it was canny shite to be honest, and I liked some of their older stuff as well. Ah well, I am what I am etc, etc. I could've written that mesel mate, av only been to two gigs in me life one an Oasis gig at the toon, which Liam showed himsel up by wearin a toon top and the other didn't enjoy it and al a could think of is there's a pub within 5 minutes waak with Derby v The Toon on in the League Cup. Si

CT TAXI's on the front of our shirt. Yeed need to chuck them tabs before yee could commit to that It's aaaaalways a mint idea in the summer but av done it for 20 year, n when the winter comes its -2 its pissin of rain yev got a stinkin hangowa, ye think fuck me ad much rather be watchin keep hold of the back page! Them were canny blokes like, I really liked that bloke ye said was a hard cunt, articulate genuine bloke. Was shocked when he said to me yeev got a different accent to us like, pmsl like am scochwad!! Me other mate left before ye got there he lives within a street of yee too.

Good lad who refereed but he was shite as a ref, reminded me of a happy Andy Pipkin. Oone worplayers was 10 years onside "aye offside" cos someone shouted. Thought me mate loughas was class to say hes not a footballer. Poor Jay's in agony wi his knee though

We passed them off the park first half, but our average age was at least 32 theirs probably 23. 3-0 up half time, I won't even mention my goal even though contrary to popular opinion I meant it, and our legs went people stopped passing, finished 3-2 but we were hanging on. Next game we'll have subs and 4 or 5 kids I wanted to play but couldn't will be there defo have subs too old to feel like Stan Ogden on a Saturday neet. Got a lot of controversial texts about peoples performances after the game pmsl. That kid that scored the goal from 65 yards,, he had a yank accent, stunk of drink and hadn't score for years if it makes you feel any better Nick