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Recommend a barber


Guest Stevie
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Guest Stevie

Obviously this won't apply to bald people but where do you get your hair cut? I'll say right away if you're a lad and you've spent over 20 quid on a hair cut, if you don't consider yourself a cunt, why not?

 

I usually get mine done in the toon, there's a really good one along from where Woolworths used to be next to Ladbrokes, good barbers, but there's one kid out of the four, he is an absolute cock of a kid. He'll be about 33, mutters when he's talking, laughs at his own jokes, goes on about being in the Toy Army, and generally is in the top 10 most boring cunts I've ever spoken to, but he's so far up his arse he couldn't comprehend such status. He's the only thing that puts me off there, if he's not funny, or interesting just shut the fuck up and cut me hair you specky twat!!

 

I've tried that one down High Bridge for years too, but the owner he's a good barber but it's depending on his hangover. The worst ever barber is Dave C in Newburn, he looks comedic and so does your hair when you come out. Any suggestions?

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Guest Stevie
Used to get it done on high bridge for years, now I usually go to the metro centre and see which one has the smallest queue.

Aye the Iranian lass is lovely in there they take the huff if you don't give them a tenner though.

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Have you tried Dom's in chapel house (I'm sure you said you were from the west end way) Or Hastings in Denton Burn? He has a dart board for while you are waiting.

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I've only once spent more than 20 quid on a haircut, was very nice at the time but grew out in no time and wouldn't spend that again.

 

I don't want to say too much publically about my usual one now (in case he reads this - toon fan) but he has got himself into financial difficulties and is possibly depressed. I don't really want to hear his latest problems when I get my hair chopped so I'm keen on any recommendations. Then again seems wrong to kick him when he's down. :D

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I usually get mine done in the toon, there's a really good one along from where Woolworths used to be next to Ladbrokes, good barbers, but there's one kid out of the four, he is an absolute cock of a kid. He'll be about 33, mutters when he's talking, laughs at his own jokes, goes on about being in the Toy Army, and generally is in the top 10 most boring cunts I've ever spoken to, but he's so far up his arse he couldn't comprehend such status. He's the only thing that puts me off there, if he's not funny, or interesting just shut the fuck up and cut me hair you specky twat!!

 

I think I know the lad you mean.

 

If he's the one who gets the metro in from South Shields.

 

:D

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Guest Stevie
I usually get mine done in the toon, there's a really good one along from where Woolworths used to be next to Ladbrokes, good barbers, but there's one kid out of the four, he is an absolute cock of a kid. He'll be about 33, mutters when he's talking, laughs at his own jokes, goes on about being in the Toy Army, and generally is in the top 10 most boring cunts I've ever spoken to, but he's so far up his arse he couldn't comprehend such status. He's the only thing that puts me off there, if he's not funny, or interesting just shut the fuck up and cut me hair you specky twat!!

 

I think I know the lad you mean.

 

If he's the one who gets the metro in from South Shields.

 

:D

That's him he's a fuckin wanker. The lass is from there as well.

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Used to get it done on high bridge for years, now I usually go to the metro centre and see which one has the smallest queue.

 

For years I used to go to the one in the Antiques Village. Last time I was up I noticed that one was still going :D

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Guest Stevie
Used to get it done on high bridge for years, now I usually go to the metro centre and see which one has the smallest queue.

 

For years I used to go to the one in the Antiques Village. Last time I was up I noticed that one was still going :D

Aye they're all nice in there, one of the birds looks like Debra Stephenson, same accent too, it's more convenient going in the toon for me though.

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I usually get mine done in the toon, there's a really good one along from where Woolworths used to be next to Ladbrokes, good barbers, but there's one kid out of the four, he is an absolute cock of a kid. He'll be about 33, mutters when he's talking, laughs at his own jokes, goes on about being in the Toy Army, and generally is in the top 10 most boring cunts I've ever spoken to, but he's so far up his arse he couldn't comprehend such status. He's the only thing that puts me off there, if he's not funny, or interesting just shut the fuck up and cut me hair you specky twat!!

 

I think I know the lad you mean.

 

If he's the one who gets the metro in from South Shields.

 

:D

That's him he's a fuckin wanker. The lass is from there as well.

 

Aye. Complete cock-end. I stopped going after I got him a few times. The woman takes the time to cut your hair properly and does a great job, but that fucker whips out the razor whatever you ask for. Might as well buy some clippers and do a trampy home job in the mirror myself. But he goes on like he should be doing royal weddings or summat.

 

As you say, shite patter anarl.

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Guest Stevie
Did someone open a topless barbers in Newcastle?

 

or

 

Depending on your outlook, theres always :D

 

6180_141698491631_133040596631_3376165_1377191_s.jpg

...and I thought The Fish wouldn't be involved in this thread!

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Guest Stevie
I usually get mine done in the toon, there's a really good one along from where Woolworths used to be next to Ladbrokes, good barbers, but there's one kid out of the four, he is an absolute cock of a kid. He'll be about 33, mutters when he's talking, laughs at his own jokes, goes on about being in the Toy Army, and generally is in the top 10 most boring cunts I've ever spoken to, but he's so far up his arse he couldn't comprehend such status. He's the only thing that puts me off there, if he's not funny, or interesting just shut the fuck up and cut me hair you specky twat!!

 

I think I know the lad you mean.

 

If he's the one who gets the metro in from South Shields.

 

:D

That's him he's a fuckin wanker. The lass is from there as well.

 

Aye. Complete cock-end. I stopped going after I got him a few times. The woman takes the time to cut your hair properly and does a great job, but that fucker whips out the razor whatever you ask for. Might as well buy some clippers and do a trampy home job in the mirror myself. But he goes on like he should be doing royal weddings or summat.

 

As you say, shite patter anarl.

Totally shite, doesn't like football neither which tells you what type of bloke he is. "They at home today?" "Shearer still playing?" Pipe down. To be honest I don't fuckin want Ken Dodd doing my hair, I just want my hair cut, the barber to pipe down, take their time and fuck off, it's not too much to ask, is it. That kid though, he's a pure bell end like you say, checks his phone every 2 fucking minutes when he's doing your hair as well.

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I started going to the one between the cash machines and Millies in Eldon square instead.

 

Again, there was a couple of lasses who were spot on. Just used to talk to each other about their pissed up nights out. Always a good laugh, and always did a good job....but this new dipshit has started. Specky dick with a mohican. Miserable as fuck and gives you a hairshave rather than a haircut. But only when he gets a minute between playing with his phone, drinking his coffee, water and lucozade (they're all lined up) or eating his mars bar.

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Bought my own hair clippers a few weeks back. Sad day tbh.

 

Not as sad as it was for Alex selling them to you.

Still use mine on my pubes. Which reminds me, last time I saw Chez, he'd let his hair grow a bit.

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Guest Stevie
Bought my own hair clippers a few weeks back. Sad day tbh.

 

 

+1

 

Once the barber started to feel like a cunt taking my money....You know its time. :D

:D

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Bought my own hair clippers a few weeks back. Sad day tbh.

 

Not as sad as it was for Alex selling them to you.

Still use mine on my pubes. Which reminds me, last time I saw Chez, he'd let his hair grow a bit.

Got more on my face at the moment. Its a tricky one to manage tbh, if you grew a beard you'd look like Uncle Albert.

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Obviously this won't apply to bald people but where do you get your hair cut? I'll say right away if you're a lad and you've spent over 20 quid on a hair cut, if you don't consider yourself a cunt, why not?

 

I usually get mine done in the toon, there's a really good one along from where Woolworths used to be next to Ladbrokes, good barbers, but there's one kid out of the four, he is an absolute cock of a kid. He'll be about 33, mutters when he's talking, laughs at his own jokes, goes on about being in the Toy Army, and generally is in the top 10 most boring cunts I've ever spoken to, but he's so far up his arse he couldn't comprehend such status. He's the only thing that puts me off there, if he's not funny, or interesting just shut the fuck up and cut me hair you specky twat!!

 

I've tried that one down High Bridge for years too, but the owner he's a good barber but it's depending on his hangover. The worst ever barber is Dave C in Newburn, he looks comedic and so does your hair when you come out. Any suggestions?

:D

 

How to win friends and influence people!

 

 

There was a barber in Wallsend I sometimes went to. Canny enough lad, but would stop and use both his hands gesturing when he got carried away talking to you, instead of just cutting and talking, (Or better still, cutting and not talking). :D

 

Am now in the stage of doing a "trampy home job" myself and prefer it to traipsing to a barbers which I always hated having to do. (I'm going the way of Zidane now, anyway.)

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Top of me street! Good patter and a good haircut, £4.50. :D

 

£4.50???? :D

 

Is that for a bowl and clippers?

 

Short back and sides man, 3 on the top, 1 the rest. Sorted!

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Top of me street! Good patter and a good haircut, £4.50. :D

 

"mind me ears, please" is always you're first comment after sitting down, I bet.

 

Only joking, Besty, only joking.

 

I get me hair done in Shiremoor when I'm home. £7.50. He's a football fanatic, so the patter is usually good. He used to be in Whitley until his landlord wanted to take the piss.

 

I get me hair cut here in India for £2.50, which includes a head massage (it feels like being punched by Ricky Hatton afterwards, though). Funnily enough, I got me hair cut yesterday morning for less than a quid, and one bloke asked if I wanted a leg massage when I was in the seat :D . I declined his most generous offer.

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Top of me street! Good patter and a good haircut, £4.50. :D

 

£4.50???? :D

 

Is that for a bowl and clippers?

 

Short back and sides man, 3 on the top, 1 the rest. Sorted!

 

 

Well mine is £5.50 ~ £6.50 and I usually give the lass £8

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