Jimbo

Bollocks, nowt like it more like Dallas tbh Actually, on second glance its more like Bonanza tbh.

I thought this was an Indiana Jones thread for a second.

[Martins9shirt]Speak for yourself[/martins9shirt]

I know kids, especially girls can look older than their years, but a ten yearold looking 16 ???

Permira have recently aquired Birds Eye, and so far they have made many cut backs, many redundancies, I have a 3 year protection plan for my contract and terms and conditions, I'm shitting myself for when that period ends, they certainly appear to be asset strippers.

A JUDGE spared a man who raped a girl of ten in a park — because she wore a “provocative” frilly bra and thong. Window cleaner Keith Fenn, 25 — who could have got life in jail — will be free in just FOUR MONTHS after admitting twice having sex with the child. Judge Julian Hall decided to be lenient because the girl “didn’t look 10”. He caused fury earlier this year by freeing another paedophile, telling him to buy his six-year-old victim a new bicycle. The judge referred to the 10-year-old as a “young woman”, and called her “very disturbed, very needy and sexually precocious”. He told Oxford Crown Court: “She liked to dress provocatively. She was 10. She’d been in care since she was four. “Did she look 10? Certainly not. She looked 16.” Fenn, of Oxford, got two years’ jail but will soon be free because of time spent awaiting sentence. Accomplice Darren Wright, 34, of Henley-on-Thames walked free after getting just nine months. Last night, campaigner Dr Michele Elliott of children’s charity Kidscape called the sentences “beyond pathetic”. The NSPCC added: “There’s no excuse.”

if your name is Emre.

The only treatment is more wanking, it is the ultimate panacea.

This is where I got mine from, not looked back since: http://www.xtendedplay.co.uk/sky-hard-driv...drive-p-47.html

Although I think the bloke is a tit, I've got to say Lineker, running a close second probably Gazza, and then Shearer.

The Empire Strikes Back

Fuck me listen to the crowd, what great support ! you see rooney in the clip? Rooney carried Hatton's belts into the ring before the fight.

I'd like to see him knock shit out of Junior Witter.

http://www.toontastic.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=14337

3pm? for a 21st? pass-the-parcel-tastic Aye, don't eat too much jelly and ice cream.

Fuck me listen to the crowd, what great support !

Deserves to be dragged out of the club by his hair in my opinion.

Striker Frederic Kanoute has dashed a number of Premier League clubs' hopes of signing him by pledging his future to Spanish side Sevilla. Newcastle, Portsmouth and Bolton were all linked with the Mali international. "I've got two years left on my contract and I'm not planning on moving," said Kanoute, 29, after he scored the goal that secured Sevilla the Spanish Cup. Sevilla, who won the Uefa Cup earlier this season, beat Getafe 1-0, though Kanoute was sent off late in the game. He was dismissed just before the final whistle for retaliating after being fouled. Kanoute scored 21 league goals last season as Sevilla finished third to claim a Champions League place, but he had been reported to be pushing for a move back to England. "I've read a lot of things that aren't true," said Kanoute, who played for West Ham and Tottenham, before he joined Sevilla in 2005. "I've had two great seasons here and now we've won another trophy." Kanoute's winner against Getafe means he has scored in all four of Sevilla's victories in cup finals over the past two seasons. He found the net in the UEFA Cup final victories against Middlesbrough in 2006 and against Espanyol last month as well as in his side's 3-0 victory over Barcelona in the European Super Cup at the start of the season.

Ouch, what a sickener of a body shot.

TRANSFER RUMOURS Arsenal will bid £10m to sign former striker Nicolas Anelka from Bolton to replace Thierry Henry. (Various) Tottenham are on the verge of signing Charlton's Darren Bent for a club record £16m. (Various) Birmingham will capture Scottish striker Garry O'Connor after he meets with manager Steve Bruce later this week. (The People) Blackburn have rejected Coventry's approach for unsettled striker Francis Jeffers. (The People) Portsmouth are winning the race to sign Preston striker David Nugent after offering him £10,000 more a week than have Sunderland. (The People) And Pompey boss Harry Redknapp is also set to sign full-back Martin Cranie from Southampton. (The People) But Redknapp faces competition from Premier league rivals Bolton for the signature of Atletico Bilbao striker Ismael Urzaiz. (The People) Everton will swoop for Fulham's Papa Bouba Diop. (The People) Manchester United have accepted a £6m bid from Middlesbrough for striker Alan Smith. (The People) However, Boro face competition from Portsmouth, who are lining up a £3.5m bid for Smith. (Sunday Mirror) Derby boss Billy Davis is chasing Sheffield United defender Claude Davis and is ready to pay £3.5m. (The People) Aston Villa are set to cool their interest in West Ham midfielder Nigel Reo-Coker as the clubs are 'poles apart' in their valuation. (The People) Portsmouth striker Andy Cole is wanted by Nottingham Forest. (The People) Manchester City defender Micah Richards has pledged his future to the club despite interest from Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool. (The People) Liverpool have rejected the chance to re-sign Michael Owen, who was offered by Newcastle in exchange for John Arne Riise and Craig Bellamy. (Various) Middlesbrough will move for Barcelona's Argentine international forward Javier Saviola. (The People) Sevilla are seeking £8m for Freddie Kanoute, who is wanted by a trio of Premier League clubs. (The People) And Portsmouth are ready hijack Newcastle's move for Kanoute by bidding £8.4m for him. (News of the world) Manchester United will again bid for Atletico Madrid's £27m-rated striker Fernando Torres. (Sunday Mirror) But they face competition from Liverpool, who are ready to pay £25m for the Spain international. (News of the World) Fulham and Blackburn are battling it out to sign Espanyol defender Juan Velasco. (Sunday Mirror) Arsenal are interested in 22-year-old Roma midfielder Alberto Aquilani. (Sunday Mirror) Sunderland want to sign Liverpool keeper Scott Carson, possibly on a season-long loan deal. (Various) Reading are battling to keep striker Leroy Lita, with Sunderland and Portsmouth ready to pay £5m for his services. (Sunday Mirror) West Ham are ready to spend £11m to sign Chelsea winger Shaun Wright-Phillips. (News of the World) Meanwhile, West Ham striker Marlon Harewood is wanted by Birmingham, Fulham, Portsmouth and Aston Villa. (News of the World) Aston Villa midfielder Eric Djemba-Djemba is wanted by Benfica. (News of the World) Chelsea are lining up an £18m bid for 17-year-old Brazilian striker Alexandre Pato. (News of the World) Bolton striker Henrik Pedersen is wanted by Preston, who are resigned to losing forward David Nugent. (News of the World) Newcastle and Celtic are competing to sign Holland under-21 striker Maceo Rigters. (News of the World) Manchester City striker Georgios Samaras is wanted by his former club Heerenveen, but only at a cut-price £2m. (News of the World) OTHER GOSSIP Manchester City's Bernardo Corradi is desperate to leave the club and return to Italy's Serie A. (Sunday Mirror) Bolton winger Ricardo Vaz Te will ask boss Sammy Lee to be allowed to leave the club. (Sunday Mirror) Arsenal will offer manager Arsene Wenger a new three-year contract in the next few days. (The People) But departing striker Thierry Henry insists Wenger will not sign a new deal. (News of the World) And both Real Madrid and Barcelona want to lure Wenger away from the Emirates Stadium. (Sunday Express) Manchester City will turn to Celtic boss Gordon Strachan if they fail to lure Sven-Goran Eriksson to the Eastlands hot-seat. (Sunday Mirror) John Toshack could quit as Wales boss to take up the role of sporting director at real Sociedad. (Various) Back to top AND FINALLY Charlton are set to close down their entire women's set-up - the second biggest in the country - following the relegation of the men's team from the Premier League, in a cost-cutting exercise. Back to top

Fuck

New Toon chief to boot out Shepherd By Paul Mccarthy NEWCASTLE owner Mike Ashley will tomorrow sack the entire board and begin a new era at St James' Park. The billionaire businessman, who took control of the club by buying the stakes owned by the families of Freddy Shepherd and Douglas Hall, will make a clean sweep and bring in his own team to run the show. That means the end of the road for the current Newcastle United PLC board of directors of Freddy Shepherd, Bruce Shepherd, Douglas Hall, Tim Revill and Allison Antonopoulos, plus company secretary Russell Cushing. The dramatic move will mark the end of an era that began in 1991, when Freddy Shepherd joined the Newcastle United board with John and Douglas Hall after a four-year takeover wrangle with Gordon McKeag. Hall and Shepherd set about building a Newcastle dynasty and in 1997 they floated the club on the Stock Exchange with a value of £193million. Sir John Hall quit but was named life-president of Newcastle United with Shepherd the chairman. Toon fans endured a stormy time during which the club has had seven permanent managers - Kevin Keegan, Kenny Dalglish, Ruud Gullit, Sir Bobby Robson, Graeme Souness, Glenn Roeder and now Sam Allardyce. The closest they came to success was in 1996 when Keegan's flamboyant team surrendered a 12-point lead to hand the Premiership title to Manchester United. The Shepherd reign has seen some sensational signings, including the formidable strike force of Alan Shearer and Les Ferdinand - but also some shockers, including Jean-Alain Boumsong, Albert Luque and Marcelino. Sports tycoon Ashley made his first move to control the club on May 23, when he bought the Halls' stake of 41.6 per cent for £55m and then launched a £133.1m formal takeover bid at 100p per share - a 14 per cent rise on the price at closing on the London Stock Exchange the day before. Chairman Shepherd, who was in hospital at the time of the bid suffering from a punctured lung, said that he planned to fight the takeover and would not allow Ashley to get his hands on his 28.6 per cent. But on June 7, after Ashley increased his share offer to 101p, Freddy Shepherd and Shepherd Offshore Services Ltd. agreed to sell their stake in Newcastle United for more than £37.5m. It was announced at the time that Shepherd - who urged other shareholders to sell to Ashley - would remain as chairman. But he will bow out having gone from a minor shareholder in the club to earning nearly £50m from salary, dividends and the sale of shares. Confirmation came on June 15 that Ashley and St. James' Holdings Ltd - the company he set up specifically to purchase shares in the club - had acquired slightly more than 77 per cent of United. This meant that Ashley could delist the company from the Stock Exchange and make it a private company again. Once Ashley reaches 90 per cent ownership, under Stock Market rules the remaining 10 per cent of shares will have to be sold to him and he will achieve his ultimate aim of total ownership. 10 TURBULENT YEARS AT NEWCASTLE ..the managers KENNY DALGLISH - Jan1997 to Aug 1998 RUUD GULLIT - Aug 1998 to Aug 1999 SIR BOBBY ROBSON - Sept 1999 to Aug 2004 GRAEME SOUNESS - Sept 2004 to Feb 2006 GLENN ROEDER - Feb 2006 to May 2007 SAM ALLARDYCE - May 2007 to present ..the best buys GARY SPEED - £5.5m from Everton NOLBERTO SOLANO - £1.5m from Aston Villa JAMES MILNER - £3.6m from Leeds OBAFEMI MARTINS - £10m from Inter Milan JONATHAN WOODGATE - £9m from Leeds ..the worst buys JEAN-ALAIN BOUMSONG - £8m from Rangers ALBERT LUQUE - £9.5m from Deportivo La Coruna HUGO VIANA - £8.5m from Sporting Lisbon TITUS BRAMBLE - £5m from Ipswich MARCELINO - £5m from Real Mallorca

Happy Birthday

didn't see the fight but a great result by Hatton, a true great, and a British boxing legend. Ricky Hatton showed America what all the fuss is about with a stunning fourth-round knockout of Jose Luis Castillo at the Thomas and Mack Center, Las Vegas. Hatton had failed to show his best form during points victories against Luis Collazo and Juan Urango in his last two outings - also both in Las Vegas - and needed to produce something special to win over his growing band of Stateside sceptics. He delivered in some style, dominating Castillo throughout a contest that ended abruptly after two minutes and 16 seconds of the fourth when a crushing body shot left the Mexican crumpled on the canvas and unable to beat referee Joe Cortez's count. Castillo, a former WBC lightweight champion, was willing to stand and trade with Hatton, a tactic that showed his undoubted bravery, but was a recipe for defeat against his quicker, stronger opponent. The opening exchanges were frenetic, Castillo briefly put his glove down - it was ruled a slip by Cortez - and Hatton soon followed up by landing squarely with two right uppercuts. A clean left hand in the closing moments of the opening round cemented the Mancunian fighter's early dominance and he continued in the same vein during the second. It was not until the third round that Castillo briefly rallied by landing his first heavy shots, although it was again Hatton who finished the round stronger by dominating some furious exchanges. And, after Castillo was docked a point for landing with a low left hook in the fourth, Hatton seized the moment with a left hook of his own that - after a slightly delayed reaction while brain caught up with body - sent a grimacing Castillo to the canvas to end the fight. The manner of victory is a huge boost to Hatton's hopes of setting up a fight with the man widely regarded as the best pound-for-pound fighter in the world, Floyd Mayweather Jnr.

The Killers - All These Things That I’ve Done