Exile

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport/sport-headlines/kinnear-unable-to-get-any-signatures-on-leaving-card-2014020583294?

Are any of us surprised? Over the next few days we'll get the same old "well, we tried to get people in but their values were inflated and we wouldn't be held to ransom, and its so hard to get people over the line these days, but look, we have Dan Gosling. He'll be like a new signing." It's obvious at this point, what Ashley's business plan is. The thought of Europe scares the bollocks off him. That means putting the premiership status at risk. Same goes for the cups. If we have a sniff of success, its going to be sabotaged, because the premiership TV money is what he is after. Nice. Safe. Profitable. He's not going to sell up. Why the hell would he? He can make money hand over fist and wind up the fans that rejected him. We'll just tick over, selling our best players and he'll jab those pudgy digits at the self destruct button any time we look like overachieving. God it's depressing, and its all become horribly predictable. I'll watch the derby game tomorrow, but I am very close to conceding defeat. Ashley has managed to turn my passion for this club into apathy, and I honestly can't see anything on the horizon that indicates hope for improvement. I need a drink. And another sport to watch. How are we doing in the cricket these days?

Going back a few years, I remember Paul Stevenson got his debut on the same day as Gazza. At the time I thought he was a better player, as opposed to the ball greedy sod that Gazza seemed to be. The wise old bloke next to me said about Gazza "one day he'll pull that off and it'll make him."

I'm not sure I buy the current line about Cabaye refusing to play. We all know that the regime are full of shit. Still not convinced that they are not keeping him from playing, then spinning this story to get the fans, if not happy that he's going, then to at least divert their anger at the player instead of the club. Pardew has been trying to flog him all summer, and with the French coaches comments you would think that he would want to be involved either on Wednesday or at the weekend, if only to keep his international career afloat. It might be just him spitting his dummy out, but to be honest I don't believe a word that comes out of Pardew or Kinnear's mouthes. I also reckon that the main reason that Kinnear was brought in was to give the fans a target, because Ashley never had any intention of spending money this window.

I'm basing this on an article I saw on Newsnow last week where he was on about taking £18 mill out this year and took 11 out last season. http://www.themag.co.uk/the-mag-articles/confused-you-will-be/? That does sound about right, though. He's clearly decided its time to start getting his money back, now that we have the extra TV money and are in the black. Like I say, that wouldn't be so much of an issue if there was some kind of balance, and the team was being invested in. Unfortunately all of the extra cash seems to be going to pay his Greggs bill, with nowt left over for the team.

I think he put in £79 million to pay off the existing debt, then put another £30 million in since, although that's just going from memory. If that's the case, then there will be £50 million left from the original loan - so £80 million in total. If he wants it all back before he sells up, then we could be looking at another 4-8 years of the fat fucker, assuming he doesn't get us relegated again in the meantime.

I'm fine with him getting his money back, but when he's basically stripping all available cash out of the club and not reinvesting any of it, it demonstrates what he's here for. He couldn't give a shit if we end each season just outside of the relegation zone. There is no ambition, or intention to push the club forward. If anything, he's doing everything in his power to prevent any kind of progression at all. Like I say, at least with him paying himself back, there is a chance that in a few years he'll fuck off and sell to someone who gives a crap about the club.

I saw an article earlier in the week that said Ashley took 11 million out of the club last year, and is going to take 18 million out this year. It's starting to look fairly obvious where our transfer funds and the TV money is going. The only glimmer of hope here is that if he continues to use the club as his own personal piggy-bank and pays himself back, that he might fuck off in a few years, or at least bring the cost of someone buying him out to something realistic. Two games played this season. Out of 180 minutes of football we have managed 21 shots on goal with 1 shot on target and no goals. If these idiots can't see that this is a problem, then we really are screwed.

There was a time when we used to up our game against the bigger teams, and at least come out of it with some pride. The pathetic display tonight sickened me. Honestly, this bunch are gutless, spineless and completely without a clue. Pardew is shite, but with JFK standing in the wings, rubbing his hands with glee and waiting to get back in the managers chair, we are truly fucked. Cabaye will be off to PSG, and I really would not be surprised if HBA ended up going to the scousers before the end of this window. And of course, no one will be brought in to replace them. That basically leaves Krul and Colo as the only competent footballers in the whole bloody squad. At least until someone waves their wallet at Ashley and he cashes in on them too. Utter, utter shite. And given that we played the same fucking crap that almost got us relegated last season, it is unfortunately looking pretty much nailed on for May. After one game against the potential league champions that's a pretty shit place to be in, but honestly, I don't see us doing anything different against anyone else. We weren't even championship quality tonight, and I struggle to see anything changing.

Bollocks to this. Wonder what else is on TV.

I'm not expecting anything from this game. The best I can hope for is that Man City don't go out to establish a nice GD cushion in the first game. If we lose by any more than 3 goals it could really hammer the teams confidence going forward. Trying desperately to find some ray of hope - the new signings have had a chance to bed in, and while the pre-season hasn't been anything special, at least it's not been a disaster. Maybe things will start to click, and we'll get in their faces, stifle their game and come out of this with some dignity - maybe even a point. Might even put a fiver on for a win. Still got some money in my skybet account left over from the Grand National.

Personally, I don't believe that Ashley had any intention of spending money in this window. We basically spent this summers money in January to keep ourselves up and all of the supposed bids have been no more than a load of hot air. As for JFK's appointment - I reckon he's been brought in as a target - someone to blame for when things go tits up. It's beyond belief, really. We almost got relegated last season because Ashley refused to strengthen the team over the summer. You would think that maybe, just maybe, he'd learn from his mistakes. Unfortunately it looks like, because we don't have European football to contend with this year, he thinks that we should just about have enough bodies in to maintain a lower - mid table position. Ignoring the fact that we've lost a bunch of players from what has been a threadbare squad since he took over.

Translation: "My job is director of football. My job is to wind up the fans, players and manager "I will not be picking the team or the tactics. I'll be standing in the dressing room, making a whistling noise and saying "I wouldn't play that daft fucker there, Alan" "I will just ensure we have the best possible team I will ensure that as many of the first team as possible hand in transfer requests. Fuck me, did you see how much we could make on Cabaye? "If the manager wants my advice on that I am sure he will ask me. The manager will get my advice, whether he asks for it or not "And he says his stint at Newcastle the first time around will hold him in good stead They already hate me, so there's not going to be any time wasted. I can get right on with crushing peoples hopes and dreams. Then calling them cunts He said: "When I took over we were third bottom but I took them to 12th. Then lost about ten games in a row and had a heart attack when things started going tits up "Then I had the heart attack at West Brom And our form taking a nose dive, and it becoming obvious to the world that I was a clueless nad-sack had absolutely nothing to do with that "We would not have been relegated. We were fucked, and to be honest, the heart attack was the best thing that could have happened to me "We were million to one not to be relegated. It was nailed on that we were going down "If I had been in charge we would not have been relegated. If I'd been in charge, we might actually have dropped down two or three divisions "Kinnear indicated his new role will see him look at recruitment and bringing in new talent Kinnear's new role will involve him cleaning clagnuts out of Mike's arse crack, then watching Loose Women while occasionally yelling out the window to the manager, pointing out all the things he's doing wrong He said:"Now I intend to make Newcastle better. I fully intend to see those Geordie bastards burn in hell "I want to make them far better than they are now I want to see the fuckers implode, because Mike's worked out he can make more money turning the stadium into a car park and casino "We want to sign the right players. We want to sell the right players. Well, all of them, actually "There is no other agenda There is another agenda. The fact that I even bothered to point this out kind of proves it "If some aren't good enough then we will move them out. Along with the ones that are good enough. I hear we might be able to get Sol Campbell back on a free transfer. And what happened to my mate Geremi? "Kinnear also insisted he is the right man for the job .He added:"I've got more knowledge than anyone at the football club As long as you only include Mike, Derek and Alan in the list "That is not being disrespectful to anybody there. But they are a bunch of cunts and they can all fuck themselves "Kinnear also said the contract had been signed, sealed and delivered. Because now it's too late for you to complain about it And says: "It is a done deal. And that one is just to rub it in "My job will be to find players and improve the club My job will be to find people to buy our players, and the club will be much improved when its sponsored by NCP

If it is, do you think that they would tell us? They haven't let us know what Ashley is paying for the stadium rights or to have his tacky logo slapped on every available surface. If it meant that he would give a transparent figure for the sponsorship that would be invested back into the club, then I'd probably moan for a bit and then put up with it. I can't help feeling that it will all be disguised by creative bookkeeping though. I can just see the press release now. "Our new sponsorship deal fell through, so in order to showcase the combined package we are just going to put "Sports Direct" on there for a while. Just until we get another sponsor." Like I say, I hope I'm wrong, but nothing that those clowns do would surprise me anymore.

It occurs to me that we have an international break coming up. If they are going to announce Sports Direct as the new sponsors of everything, then you can bet that will when they drop the bombshell. They love to give bad news when there's no game for a couple of weeks to reduce any protests. I'd love to be wrong, but it's been a while since Ashley has pushed the self destruct button with those pudgy digits. He's due another one.