Alex

I fucking knew before I was even telt that she'd let it slip after my Mam's mate mentioned in my earshot (acidentally on purpose as it were) that she'd love a pet rabbit

This is true. After (at the most) a couple of glasses of wine my lass thought it was fine to tell all the women at a family do that I'd recently bought her a vibrator.

Really? I thought nearly everyone had one of these: http://viz.co.uk/queent-mother-32-glorious-teeth/

Aye, a tartan Tam o' shanter

Aye, he wouldn't need surgery to look better than Teresa May in a dress.

Must be fucking killing CT that's he's being largely ignored and there's been some good banter on here today. Long may it continue tbh.

He'd have a Saltire on his top, surely

It's like you read my mind.

I genuinely don't feel like I have to be honest. I was never exactly promiscuous anyway though. Not a dig at anyone who is/was either. I'm sort of glad I haven't got any daughters though

Can't believe he's ex-Army

Never seen Geordie Shore like but I would imagine it's not exactly spontaneous banter

That momentum has taken a beating

Heaven knows I'm miserable now

Just seen this :lol:

Indeed And she's probably done the nation's youth a favour in forfeiting that career path.

Funny anyway but even better if the pun was intentional

I know but still. Like Gemmill mentioned previously she might as well give up training to be a teacher now. You probably get about a grand max for selling your story to the likes of Take a Break (or Take a Dump, as my mate calls it).

Great / sordid minds, eh?

The arse or the porno? Genuinely confused here

He'll be sending her round to punch you if you're not careful.

I'm not a prude (although I probably am given my age, etc.) but why on earth would you want to make something like that public?

I'm not a prude (although I probably am given my age, etc.) but why on earth would you want to make something like that public?

I meant her arse rather than the home made porn movie (which I assume you're referring to - didn't know about it). All I know about her is she's a reality TV star, married to Kanye West and has a very nice hint-end.

Those photos man. What a bint.