acrossthepond

One mention of us on the BBC's live coverage so far, and it's to say Gomis isn't coming, which I think we all already knew. We've never really been in for anyone, have we? It's all been bullshit. Cue an eleventh hour bid for McCarthy (or Ozil, both are equally realistic in terms of we're not signing either.)

McCarthy is inferior to Cabaye, Ince is a good prospect and a signing I'd like us to make, but we'd have to pay top dollar, I don't think Gomis wants to come here, Hughes is again a top prospect but his price would be too high for our illustrious owner, and N'Zogbia would never come here (not that I'd want him back either.) Also, what's the point of getting 20m for a player when that money is not re-invested in the team? Again, we're better off keeping him, since we won't be signing a replacement.

And won't the best price be in January after he's played half a season with us, rather than when he's sulking and suitors think they can take advantage and get him on the cheap? Plus that caveat you included "if we can get someone else in", won't be happening. We're better off keeping him for now.

He's rubbish. Gouffran would be a better choice on the left wing. Marveaux is a poor facsimile of a footballer who contributes nothing when we don't have the ball and has none of the passion that we'll undoubtedly need this season.

Tomorrow's my birthday. NUFC-related birthday presents have always been terrible (KK quit on my birthday, for example) and this one looks to be no different. We will sign no-one.

Cracks papered over. Our attacking threat was nonexistent until Remy came on. Makes a bit of difference, a new signing, eh Joe and Mike? We may have got the three points but I predict many more dire afternoons of football such as what we saw for 70 minutes today unless we bring in new attacking talent.

Pick that the fuck out!!

Despite being solely used as a winger last season, you can see how Pardew is transitioning to using Gouffran as a striker. Soon we'll start hearing about how "we couldn't get another striker over the line, but we've got plenty of good strikers at the club already, like Papiss, Shola, Yoan, and Adam...."

Switch to 4-3-3 and take Marveaux off for Remy would be my expert tactical advice. We need more men forward.

Oh, the "already" made it sound like he'd been dragged back here.

Injured, or recalled by the club for other reasons?

Fixed that for you.

I agree, there is a worrying lack of movement. Movement of funds from your bank account to the SBR foundation's, that is.

Ameobis for the win! Great finish.

Should have taken Marveaux off, he's useless.

Another nightmare miss.

As usual we have no intention of taking this competition seriously. The kids may scrape by Morecambe or may not, but either way it doesn't matter in the long run as we'll not make a go of it this year (or any year.) Premier League survival is all we play for.

It's become a chore to watch to be quite honest and I feel for the people who have season tickets and go for the bairns/family. Watching free from across the ocean is wretched enough, but paying to have your hair come in and be told it's Christmas (© trophyshy) is beyond the pale. It's one giant piss-take now and has been ever since Keegan walked and Ashley threw a strop when we told him, in essence, that the honeymoon was over. But I understand the opposite viewpoint that says back the team no matter what. Why should we allow this fat chancer and his cronies to suck the enjoyment out of something that we own and have always loved? I can't blame those who walk away or those who stay and try to support the lads. It's a desperate position and one that shows no sign whatsoever of changing.

Utterly dire. We will go down playing like that. I want that ninety minutes of my life back.

Much like the match they're about to display.

Cabaye is sitting on his own in a room somewhere in the bowels of St James's Park, wrapped in twelve layers of cotton wool. There's no way it's his decision not to play. As soon as bids started coming in, Fat Mike will have ordered him to be pulled.

Fat Sam was abysmal in both match preparation and tactics, and his signings were, by and large, rubbish as well. Anyone remember Rozenhal, for example? But nobody could forget Alan Smith. Allardyce is a fraud of a manager who deserved everything he got here. Nowadays I wouldn't even blink at the level of embarrassing shambles he brought to the club, but at the time, we were still relatively well thought-of and he made us a laughingstock with 4-1 home losses to Pompey and conceding 4 points to Derby (the most they got off any one club that season as I'm sure I don't need to remind anyone.) Every time we face him I hope we stick it to the fat cunt but I doubt it'll happen today. 1-1.

This is the brutal truth. Pardew's grass is looking pretty brown and sad at the moment, but the grass is most definitely not greener on the other side. We're better off sticking with him. At the very worst, you can say that he's kept us up, which Kinnear has not done (and will not do.) I've been on holiday so I've not been posting or reading much, but the gloom that pervaded this board before I left has not lifted whatsoever. Maybe a win tomorrow will help with that, but I doubt it. We look fucked this season unless new players, specifically goalscorers, come in over the next week.

He always makes our position clear, which is that our key players won't be sold until silly money comes in for them (ex. Carroll) or until we no longer require them (ex. Nolan/Barton.) So far they've been consistent about that. The only exception really is Enrique, but he wanted to go and was entering the last year of his contract, plus we replaced him. There's no point in Pardew saying we're not a selling club because everyone knows we are. He'd just look even more of a stooge than he already does if he went out there and said "Hands off our players, you're not getting any of them."

Because we've sold so many first team players since January 2011, right? We sold Nolan and brought in Cabaye. We released Barton on a free. We couldn't keep Ba because of a cheap release clause. So much for "putting players in the shop window." That talk that Pardew always puts out is to lower our expectations just in case a superbid (which Ashley will surely accept) does come in. But for all the talk of us being a selling club, we haven't sold the crown jewels yet. We'll see if that changes.