Jan 0 Posted January 4, 2012 Share Posted January 4, 2012 Not being able to maintain bladder control until half time at the match. I used to sit next to a guy we dubbed the "15 minute man" as that was all he could seem to last before heading to the loo/bar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted January 6, 2012 Share Posted January 6, 2012 Lad at work says 'Goodbye now' when he ends a phone call, what is the point of the 'now'? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted January 6, 2012 Share Posted January 6, 2012 I do that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted January 6, 2012 Share Posted January 6, 2012 Why? I just don't understand it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted January 6, 2012 Share Posted January 6, 2012 I picked it up in my days behind a bar from the old man who was there every day. He'd always say 'goodbye now' when he left so after 2 years it became ingrained into my psyche. No idea why he says it though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jan 0 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Starting a letter with; "I am writting to you...." I know you are writting to me its a bloody letter! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Car Park tariffs. Utter thieving bastards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 6434 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 (edited) 'Top' chefs' recipes that are shite and spoil your dinner. Edited January 9, 2012 by trophyshy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38779 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 You been boiling eggs a la CT? What happened? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 6434 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 HFW's gnocchi, dough was impossibly wet using his instructions. Added extra flour to make it manageable and it was just uberstodge in the end. Took BASTARD AGES as well. These are the sorts of things these books should be advising on, the requisite wetness of the dough and how to manage it if it's meant to be really wet etc, instead they just leave you to get on with fucking it up on your own. First time I've made gnocchi, but still the recipe should frigging work. Kill Baldrick first is usually my approach to cooking, incidents such as this reinforce that view. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Hope you didn't knead the shit out of it. Gnocchi don't like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38779 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 "Kill Baldrick…" You'll feel better reading this. http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2011/sep/19/cookbook-errors-recipes-for-disaster Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 6434 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 (edited) Hope you didn't knead the shit out of it. Gnocchi don't like that. Yeah I was mindful of that, but this was unkneadable, i.e. sticky as all fuck, until I'd doubled the prescribed quantity of flour. Odd. Apologies for turning this thread into a cooking thread when the cooking thread is right next to it. Edited January 9, 2012 by trophyshy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Never done gnocchi actually, bit too starchy and filling for me whenever I've tried it. Hate it when people put up recipes that simply do not work. It's like all these American sites who hoy bacon into everything. Always getting chocolate bacon candy etc recipes coming up on Stumbleupon. Worst is when food bloggers have pictures of their kids all over their sites. You're blogging about cookery, I don't want to see ugly children putting me off your shitty food. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38779 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 I reckon we can turn this into The Cooking Thread Mk II if we post the shit out of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChezGiven 0 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Starting a letter with; "I am writting to you...." I know you are writting to me its a bloody letter! You may not be aware of the rules of formal business letter writing in that case and for unsolicited or first communications (including email). You should always state that in the first para/line of a cover letter too. I have toyed with alternative wordings but that is the most efficient and to the point way to state the exact nature of the letter in an opening sentence. For example if you're applying for a job, a cover letter is a formal notification of application. Therefore 'Dear Sir, I am applying for the job you advertised' sounds stupid, whereas 'Dear Sir, I am writing to formally apply for the advertised position of...' sounds pro. If you arent explaining why you are writing in the first sentence then you should be typing-up, not composing. People who dont know the rules. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trophyshy 6434 Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Smart arses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chronic the Drug Wasp 6 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Yaris drivers: In my experience, there are more cunts behind the wheels of these than any other vehicle. The misapplication of the word 'literally': Started a few years ago and has now reached epidemic proportions. Arseholes. Americanised British people: Nothing more cringeworthy than hearing a local say "cool" or "awesome" in the same context an American would. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chronic the Drug Wasp 6 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Oh and adult autograph hunters. There's not a sorrier sight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CleeToonFan 1 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 People on facebook who post pictures of themselves semi-inebriated as a way of showing how mental they are. Followed by a "Oh God just getting a hangover haha, I can't remember it, i'm never drinking again... I say that but just wait till next weekend ey ". The amount of times i've had to resist the urge to type "I hope you get roofied next week and wake up in an alley missing a hand next to a tramp with HIV." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 3997 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Just had the Jehovah's at the door and chased them. Urggh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26391 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Just had the Jehovah's at the door and chased them. Urggh I'm guessing it didn't take them long to outpace you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 3997 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Just had the Jehovah's at the door and chased them. Urggh I'm guessing it didn't take them long to outpace you. Old hag and 20 year old (not pretty) daughter on the doorstep. Open door, Old hag lifts first foot onto next step and thrusts magazine up saying "Do you think we should all be more honest these days". I reply, "I do..(leave a little pause to get their hopes up) and Im not interested thanks flower, goodbye". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Just had the Jehovah's at the door and chased them. Urggh Had them at mine recently. I just said "It's not a good time" (it wasn't) and slammed the door. I think they're fucking weirdos anyway but I think it's particularly bad crack when they bring their kids along. Bunch of touchers tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26391 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 They're not as bad as the cunts who have the temerity to come to my front door asking me to set up a charity direct debit. At least you can avoid chuggers in the street with a polite 'no thanks'. But actually calling to my door is becoming a more regular occurrence these days. 8.30 on Friday night the bastard has the cheek to knock on, I was in absolutely no form for him at that point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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