ewerk

Bruno is the favourite to be booked despite going 14 games without a booking. Now that he isn’t under threat of a ban I completely agree with the bookies.

No Olise for them is a bonus.

You’re also making the assumption that the three times a week is with the same woman.

Call me cynical but I'm sensing some nepotism here.

I've been a Remington Quick Cut user for about ten years now. It's the dog's balls.

Either you’re a MASSIVE liar or you’ve had a ‘holiday’ to Turkey in the last ten years.

A man so nails that the only thing that can kill him is a fridge magnet.

Simpler times.

Aye, sixth then becomes Europa Conference.

'Hmmm, that young lad seems a bit quiet over there. I know what'll bring him out of his shell, I'll carry a massive microwave over to his desk and get him to lift it from there to the canteen'.

Hope you have a good day, Gemmill!

Ratcliffe massively overpaid for a minority share in the club but is baulking at pay £15m for the man he sees as integral to the success of that purchase? How the fuck did this man become a billionaire? There's a touch of the Mike Ashleys about him.

Does Chelsea’s goal difference plenty of harm too.

It doesn’t say much for you when her standards are clearly that low.

Preparing herself for Callum’s departure.

I bet you were more fewmin’ at the disrespect xG was getting on the pod.

Are you alright in the head?

HMHM is just the Geordie version of this:

A Berlingo is a van, mate.

Offsides don't fall under the clear and obvious criteria, for those decisions you're either offside or you aren't. A big part of the problem with VAR is that a lot of the other decisions they're overturning aren't clear and obvious errors.

Hundreds and thousands.

It's a strange one that. We're happy for our clubs to go out and spend huge money on the best players in the world yet there's never been a case of us recruiting a foreign referee because they're one of the best at what they do.

Most manufacturers guarantee their batteries for eight years so unless you're planning to keep it for longer than that it isn't much of a worry.

Wasn't it them who produced some stupid anti-Saudi banner last season? What's their beef with us?