Meenzer

Aye. All your fault.

Oh well.

Opening Credits: Blender - Rock 'n' Roll Fantasy Waking Up: That "Rainbow" parody that goes "One skin, two skin..." etc. First Day At School: The Magnetic Fields - Sweet Lovin' Man Falling In Love: Xavier Naidoo - Sie sieht mich nicht (wrong gender, but otherwise strangely appropriate ) Losing Virginity: Nightwish - Sleepwalker Fight Song: Zeljko Joksimovic - Lane moje (possibly the most sedate song ever recorded ) Breaking Up: Gro Anita Schønn - Maxi-Midi-Mini Prom: KT Tunstall - Under The Weather Life: Hoobastank - The Reason Mental Breakdown: Anthrax - Madhouse Driving: Finn - Suffer Never Flashback: U2 - Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses Getting Back Together: Architecture In Helsinki - In Case We Die Wedding: Andreas Alexiou - Bim Bam Bom (a Euro-cheese parody from the 'Eurovision' stage show ) Birth of Child: The Hidden Cameras - Smells Like Happiness Final Battle: Number Nine - Where Have All The Good Times Gone Death Scene: Rod Stewart - Young Turks Funeral Song: Fiona Apple - The Child Is Gone This is going to be one fucked-up film.

Apoptygma Berzerk - Shine On Keeping in the spirit of recent discussions on here, an EBM-flavoured House Of Love cover. Mmmmm... sacri-licious.

The full £88m then?

Supoib!

The Hidden Cameras - Ban Marriage

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Ah, but what colour were his tears?

Diamanda Galas - You Must Be Certain Of The Devil

I've been 'approached' twice by BA stewards over the years Both declined, I must admit - though it's always nice to be asked Must be my good looks and cute ass, I reckon Good grief. There was a young Germanwings steward called Bastian who used to, erm, service me frequently when I did Hamburg-London on a regular basis last year. Flirty swine, but we never got as far as the mile-high club. Mind, you get some rough old queens on some routes, picking up passengers for a quick post-flight fumble is probably about all they can get these days...

Fantastic line-up, that

Always used to have a problem with BA and their troupe of hard-faced orange bitches masquerading as cabin crew, but I've had cause to fly with them a few times recently and have been pleasantly surprised. In fact, I'll be using them tomorrow morning. They'll probably slop hot coffee all over me now I've sung their praises.

Lersh if done properly. Less so if it involves rubbery codfish.

Thunder! I'd forgotten about them. Kerrang! used to think the sun shone out of their collective, hairy arse.

£15 for a phone call?!

Had some vege ratatouille type stuff on slices of granary baguette, topped with mozzarella and stuck under the grill for a few minutes. Magic.

She's doing fine.

Dresden Dolls - Yes, Virginia

Closing earlier than advertised on Christmas Eve is a bit daft, mind.

One of my favourites: Mr Hilter in England: Nein, I was not head of Gestapo at all... I make joke. Love it

Accurate reflection of the music-buying public I suppose.

The Germans even use the word "Herpes" for a cold sore. "I had a terrible herpes last week" isn't the kind of phrase you expect to hear in polite conversation.