Gemmill

Looking at the even bigger picture - the slick stuff we played in the first half was a one-off. I'm not about to forgive Roeder for 45 minutes when we looked half-decent. You just have to listen to Roeder after a match and how utterly insipid he is, and then the way we look as a team makes perfect sense: we look like a team that's been sent out with a Glenn Roeder teamtalk ringing in its ears.

Eh? Honestly we should just be thankful that this lad is wasting any of his short career at our shit club, never mind complaining at his desire to play for England. If Alan Shearer had come back from injury and said that he couldn't wait to get playing for England again, no one would say a thing. Playing football at all is something that Owen has had to look forward to for a while. Pretty soon playing for England will be the only thing he has to look forward to.

Luke's reaction is blatantly that of a parent when they lose their kid in a shop or something and they're really happy to see them back, but at the same time they have to give them a bollocking. Hugging them like mad but at the same time going "Don't you EVER wander off like that again!"

He did well. Much better than I expected from him in his first game, and lasted the full match. He must look around that pitch and wonder what the fuck he's got himself into though. Seriously he must be thinking "How the fuck did it come to this? Liverpool, Real Madrid, and now THIS."

The most depressing thing of all is that we've got another full season of this to endure. It's not going to get better until that tit goes and he's not going in the summer. Depressing as fuck.

ZOMG movement and anticipation from a centre forward. WTF is that?!

Tell them Ray Ranson rang you you fucking numpty.

Why have they got this ugly twat on ffs? Giving bairns across the country nightmares.

Aye I didn't see that either 2J. Thought he looked good for us.

Link us up, baby!

A length of plastic drainpipe with a roller skate at each end makes an ideal "car" for snakes. G. Dorson, Skipton.

We're gonna look a right set of cunts when the police start investigating the board. I don't want that Gemmill Mr. Funny thing getting put in the paper either. Not unless they say that peasepud is a renowned Peeping Tom with a pigface.

I don't think he's going anywhere tbh. Shepherd is content with having a mong that he can push around, and has no intention of fucking up his summer off having to look for a new manager (which is why we always replace ours during the season btw).

Yeah because losing won't see Roeder get the boot. Plus I've got £40 riding on us finishing above Boro.

*a hush descends on the forum*

I can't really see that tbh. I reckon England will still end up qualifying in which case he's got a canny wait on his hands as they won't ditch him until and unless he starts struggling in the following World Cup qualification games. He could feasibly be waiting til 2010.

All that time spent hanging around with Silky is paying off for The Fish.

"Mr. Hitler rang me today to say that he has absolutely no intention of invading Poland."

Alan Brazil was on this morning pronouncing Kasabian as Casa Bien.

Aunt Polly wouldn't have had ethnics living next door to her either.

Investigative journalism at its finest. Can you imagine if Oliver worked at The Washington Post during Watergate?

He honestly thinks he's bringing us good news. "Don't panic! Glenn's here to stay. " After all, he still genuinely believes that Roeder was the fans' number one choice at the time of appointment.

How much would you love half an hour with Alan Oliver in a room with a load of his press clippings, just to highlight what a total penis he truly is. Surely over the course of 30 minutes you could make him see what a twat he appears to the general public.

Tell them you're throwing a relegation party at yours on the last day of the season. See who comes.

If he's fully recovered from his injury and back in full training then we may as well play him tbh. He'll be desperate to get a game too.