Gemmill

If it does get called for July 4th, as rumoured, they're absolutely playing into Count Binface's "Bindependence Day" hands.

Have that you jetlagged cockney cunts!

Murphy to cause an international incident by breaking the no blasties agreement.

Commentator suggesting that Maddison's goal in a jetlagged friendly match in a cricket ground in Australia might have given Southgate some food for thought. Yeah I'm sure he's watching. He doesn't have a proper job either.

Snap election rumours are back. Probably bollocks again, but we live in hope.

As long as the pay cheques remain real, you can call it what you like. 😎

Bruno casually dribbling across the 6 yard line in front of our goal, put under zero pressure. Aye I'd say these lads have had a word pre match.

There's surely some sort of friendly agreement in place between the sides not to do anything daft here. No one wants their leg in a cast for the summer.

Penis of a commentator on my feed bigging Isak up as a high profile transfer candidate for Manchester City and Arsenal. £200m arseholes.

He's still flying under the radar at the minute but George Clarke fucking HATES Tories almost as much as he loves amazing spaces.

The players should just wait for the ref to blow the whistle and all wander over to the sideline for a 90 minute drinks break.

You shouldn't have made him Italian American.

10:45am.

Enjoy the match, Aussie lads. Is anyone watching it over here? You can pay £8 or something to see both matches but I'm assuming it might also be on dodgy telly.

They are wearing their correct colours you fucking drama queen. But it's not the 80s anymore where a handful of games are on telly every season. Every single game is televised somewhere and that has implications. This is one of the more minor ones.

Merson giving his thoughts with slavvers on his jumper.

Who takes their fucking socks and shoes off on a train btw? Anyway, another stinking day beckons for Sunak where he'll be expected to sack Mercer, but probably doesn't have the balls to.

Soldier Boy cabinet minister Johnny Mercer sitting openly writing a memo slagging off the PM on a train. Laptop screen duly photographed by passenger and handed to the Times.

He was very much the intended audience.

The article says that Berrada was using an Ineos email address to communicate with Ashworth. If I could be arsed I'd go back and find all the Man United supporting dickheads on twotter who were telling me that "successful businessman" Ratcliffe couldn't be making a mistake by demanding staff return to the office, because successful businessmen are incapable of making mistakes..... and tell them all to FUCK OFF.

My lass didn't know what a pangolin looked like so I googled it and came across this busty hottie.

It kind of is important for a globally televised sport, for which the clubs make the vast majority of their money from broadcasting rights, that people watching on TV can make out the player numbers.