Gemmill

Well I didn't get my pre exit poll sleep. Looks like I'm going LOOOOONG BABY!

Listen, none of you even realised mine was a pun, such were the insane levels involved. It took an Australian to wake up for the pun to be revealed. Since then about 5 of you have used fungi/fun guy. You can all just FUCK OFF.

Antipasto selection Olives with basil and garlic Dinky honey and mustard sausages Pork pie A selection of crisps Some cans of margaritas Belgian chocolate flapjack Very cosmopolitan selection

I lost track of the French story, but I gather the Left and Macron's lot have got together and stood down a bunch of candidates. I mean Le Pen is gonna claim that the establishment has ganged up on her etc but it at least stops them forming the majority.

https://www.theneweuropean.co.uk/james-ball-your-viewing-guide-to-election-night/ This reckons 241 seats will declare between 3 and 4 am, including: Jeremy Hunt Alex Chalk Gillian Keegan Esther McVey Grant Shapps Penny Mordaunt Iain Duncan Smith Jeremy Corbyn So if you were gonna set your alarm for any time, 3 am would be it. 4am to 5am gives you: Sunak Farage Lee Anderson Rees-Mogg 5am to 6am: Truss Mercer Could be 3 of the best hours of TV this decade.

Stay safe.

It's easy for you veggies. It was enough for me to try and recall the name of three mushrooms. Obviously I went for the exotic ones like button.

I'm going out to get Politisnacks later. Yeah I made that name up myself. I think I might keep it a bit healthy and go for a full antipasti platter, which I'll bust out at midnight. Part of the thinking is that it'll force me to stay awake to stop the dog eating it.

Craig: Basingstoke Andrew: Burnley HMHM: strawb: Gorton and Denton Gloom: Dulwich and West Norwood Rayvin: Dumfriesshire, Clydesdale and Tweeddale PaddockLad: Poole NJS: Chelmsford Meenzer: North West Cambridgeshire Me, Alex and Toonpack: Cramlington and Killingworth Sonatine: City of Durham Holden: East Worthing and Shoreham KCG: East Kilbride and Strathaven Renton and The Ayatollah: Tynemouth wykiki: Leeds North East brokendoll: Monmouth Billy Whitehurst: Chelsea and Fulham spongebob: Hove and Portslade Dazzler: Newcastle Central and West The Fish: Cheadle

This is Luke Edwards's origin story.

Imagine having to look to Lee Anderson as your second in command. I'm actually gutted Anderson looks like holding his seat. Farage has probably saved his job for him by choosing to run. I was looking forward to GB News having to break the news to him that he's no longer useful to them anymore.

Aye, I don't want Tice there cos I want Farage to have to front it all up. See how he's doing after 6 months of going on to the Today programme and having to answer questions about why one of his MPs has been tweeting about cloud-seeding and the Great Reset. He'll fucking lose it eventually, and it'll be great.

I actually hope the Tory wins there. The idea of Farage having to manage a Parliamentary Reform Party of him, Anderson and maybe one or two of the genuine mental cases who think Hitler was a good lad and want chemtrails investigating, would be amazing.

Aye neither of them are getting my vote.

I'll go 109.

Didn't notice any NUFC crests in that video.

This is bullshit mind, hopefully these people go back. I'm sure some people won't bother though.

Jenkyns is on one today. Wait til she's had a few drinks tonight.

If I manage to stay awake, you'll probably have a better night than you had in 97.

I don't really know AC/DC so I'll bow out of this one. I'll just keep posting graphs and shit.

This shows number of projected seats based on expected majority %age. Dark colour is > 10% majority Medium is 5 to 10% majority Light colour is <5% majority. Look at the light band for the tories as compared to their dark band. The vast majority of the seats they're expected to win are on a less than 5% majority. 28 is the highest proportion of seats they're expected to win with a greater than 10% majority. Compare that with Labour where for the most part their required 326 seats comes from >10% majority. I just want the exit poll now like, I'm fucking boring myself.

Dunno, but I do wonder if for an election with as unusual an expected result as this one, whether the 2pm thing will hold. Although when he's saying we generally know "the result", he probably just means the absolute headline as to who is going to win. So maybe actually they will already know that if it's a landslide.

Aye, the new estate in Hazelrigg is calling itself North Gosforth something or other. That's an absolute pisstake, but it's a good 3 mile closer to Gosforth than Seaton Burn is.