SoHelpMeGod

It's alright lads, doesn't matter that Man U are still utter shite, their manager "believes in his system". It'll get them a few wins at some point, I'm sure. They are the gift that keeps on giving.

Poor bastard had only pinched them from a nearby charity shop the day before, give him a break! First clean pair of trousers he's had since 2003, bless the stupid twat.

Same here, City. A lot of it for me has to do with the fact that Arsenal's supporters would become infinitely more insufferable if they won the league, which should be impossible.

Least you're not talking to a sea of empty pink seats, foaming at the mouth every Saturday like. Every cloud

Let Burn cut Greenwood's bollocks off and then chuck them to Barnes to use for shooting practice. Quite mild I'd say

The "rules" fuck everyone over at some point. A change is long overdue. Unfortunately for City's fans, it was just their turn. However, the calls weren't the only issue, their players just couldn't put their chances away. Totally understand why they are upset though.

The Stadium of Shite's singing section and their charity shop staple CD "The Sounds Of Inbreeding: Sunderland's Greatest Hits" would like a word

Arteta's Mrs must love him, he's incapable of finishing anywhere other than second

Hope that woman battering shitebag gets a proper kicking. Let the big boys throw him about a bit and see how he likes it... Probably very much, actually, the fucking fairy. They'll put the white flags up before the coach even pulls in because they'll mistake it for a German tank. Doing their ancestors proud

If Pep is doing what Cascarino says he's doing, then the slaphead needs to fuck off to be honest. Absolutely reeks of "big 6" entitlement. Quite right, he's not Pep's player, hands off and mouth shut. Cunt.

They also weren't at home, I think calls have a better chance of going our way at SJP no matter who we are playing to be fair. But yes City haven't been established long enough to have a huge amount of that "sway". At the end of the day we won the match and can be very happy

Let's hurry up and batter these French cunts so we can get back to storming up the league for a surprise title charge. 3-0 to us

Must be so exhausting having genuine meltdowns and "an investigation" every time you lose a game of football mind. Though I suppose it all comes with a lifetime of entitlement, delusion and expecting the media to shit themselves every time your club does something. No credit given to Forest for thumping them, of course. Typical lol

Seeing so many people crying online about how we "cheated" or "bought the match" is making the victory even sweeter. It's about time a few dodgy decisions and tight VAR calls went our way so I don't really care. Though I am genuinely shocked that it didn't all go in City's favour.

Won't be long until Slot is gone and they're a revolving door club, I hope. Roll up, roll up! The Scouse Circus is coming to town... Just keep an eye on your valuables!

My mistake. Must've missed him, was too busy watching Haaland get pocketed for the whole game

The work Eddie, his staff and the rest of the players must have put in to make this heap of shite look even remotely good...!

That lot know what envelopes are now? Fascinating, they must've graduated from flinging lumps of shite at each other as their primary method of communication

Is this bloke actually real or just an urban legend that gets spread around the club? Nobody's ever seen or heard him at SJP, but many are certain he exists...

Should give our full back pairing a nickname. Sydney Sweeney's Tits. What a pair they are indeed.

^ GT, let other teams underestimate us. Plays into our hands. Anyway, Barnes will get all the plaudits for today, and rightfully so. But I want to give a nod to Thiaw. Was an absolute rock today and looked so dependable. Can't wait to see what he does for us. Between him and Barnes, I can't decide on a MOTM.

No, same. Just taking the piss. He clearly loves the game and has done so much in and for it. Helps that he's not shoved in your face every 3 seconds unlike Amorim.

What do we think Bruno said to Pep? Something along the lines of, "Fuck off you bald fraud, you couldn't afford my right foot, enjoy the long journey back"?

Fucking fantastic that. Well done lads, all needed this result and we deserve it. Get a few players back and give City one of the toughest games they will have all season. Eddie brilliant today, not out of the woods yet as we need to keep winning, but he was not the only issue in terms of our league form and I think today shows that. Let's really kick on and climb up the table now, use this for confidence. We know what we can do, so let's keep doing it. Absolutely buzzing, made my day, enjoy the rest of your weekends. This calls for a pint!

Great performance from Barnes today. Done himself and us proud