Monkeys Fist

Pardew's pre-match briefing sorted.

made a sandwich earlier, 2 slices of granary bread bit of butter bit of cheese 2 slices of ham Had some crisps earlier. 1 packet of crisps Boomtown. Fancied some chocolate earlier. Couldn't be arsed Beat that!

3 hours? Wtf was he doing like? It's an hour at best. Oh , and man up you big Jesse

Wax the patio tbh.

" … .…" Fuck off John Cage.

Next to the Keelmans Hospital on Pandon Bank. Brrrrrrrrrr!

Jeez its cold today! Fingers have gone through the freeze-thaw-intense pain bit, nuts are like lentils. Roll on summer.

Guess who?

With you and Fish here, hope we annihilate them. That or, we play shite, get some outrageous decisions , and spawn it. Either way, send their classless bunch of fuckwit fans home with faces like a slapped arse.

Its Apron, bitch-tits, not pinny.

Aye, I know what you mean I honestly thought he'd pegged it years ago.

Win= Tits Oot for the Lads. Aeris, not CT. Just for clarity.

Plenty of Ferrero Rocher knocking about.

Win= Tits Oot for the Lads.

I've had this a lot over the years as well. Whenever I do anything nice for a girl they think I've done something bad, so I've stopped doing anything nice now and instead just scream at them to get out my fucking way. They are unfathomable creatures.

Doesn't he have to be Norwegian or something? Is this the one that's in Kazahkstan or somewhere ?

Who is taking part in this week's Norwegian Eurovision final, fact fans! What what what? What's he singing , like?

It's Johnny Cash man! Yeah, what an idiot. Aye, sos like Idioteque, I was a bit previous there Johnny's version is better though Kings of Leon "All the commotion The kiddie-like play Has people talking Talking You Your sex is on fire" Really Boys??

It's Johnny Cash man!

" An Albino A Mulatto A Mosquito My Libido Yeah. " Aye, you can fuck off too, Kurt. The whole song has utterly woeful lyrics, but it's a belter all the same

Much as I love Led Zep, they are responsible for some stinking lyrics like "With a purple umbrella and a fifty cent hat, Livin', lovin', she's just a woman. Missus cool rides out in her aged Cadillac. Livin', lovin', she's just a woman. *Come on, babe on the round about, Ride on the merry-go-round, We all know what your name is, So you better lay your money down. Alimony, alimony payin' your bills, Livin', lovin', she's just a woman. When your conscience hits, you knock it back with pills. Livin', lovin', she's just a woman." Have a word Percy!

"I got a job working construction for the Johnstown Company But lately there ain't been much work on account of the economy" Fuck off Bruce.

"Have a piece of toast"?