Monkeys Fist

The CT approach to women

2 reasons he'll not be coming. Ashley and Llamearse. Plus, he's no Shane Ferguson eh, what, CT?

Time to re-post a personal favourite; Why did Diana cross the road? Momentum

You need a chat with Wykiki mate. He wrote the book. You don't need me to tell you how you feel now, but sooner than you think you'll be looking at the fit bird at work and thinking " I'll have some of that, Thanks "

Serious? Minutes silence. Edit; D'oh!

Walking through Elswick at midday in summer is hardcore, never mind daft o'clock on NYE.

At first glance, I thought they were Trololo pies Has someone eaten them all yet?

should have known someone would take it too far...... didn't think it would be you though Edit. As it happens, that is right, and you've unwittingly made my point. Nothing unwitting about it, Sunshine Happy New Year

So it's Royal Family, or Osama? Isn't he a Saudi Royal ?

Whilst chopping onions for tonights dinner in the bufty, bit pissed, just cut off my knob-end. If anyone has any tips, give me a bell. Happy New Year Laydeez and Genlmun.

Aye. Definitely had a hint of horse about her mind.

No chance of a baby sitter, so once kids are in bed, a meal, wine, etc. No fancy dress, but I'll be getting Mrs. Fist into the rubber dress and gimp mask later.

I was pissed off the Liverpool game was called off. I remember being forced to watch her wedding as a kid, so I was planning on a play station session when they planted her. Was all ready to go when this twat who used work in the same bar as me turned up with his daughter, expecting to watch it. I was well pissed off, and utterly bemused by the 'stranger grief'. The soft bastard started crying when EJ started warbling. Speaking of Posh cock hounds, this would get the Fist;

It was going to happen at some point. Is Shola still injured? I've lost track.

shussssh hes on a roll. I reckon we should drop Enrique and let Ferguson have a go. This club is a disgrace

Enough of him and more than enough of Jonas. 2 games? Do you watch the reserves much?

Played a blinder against Aldershot

Baileys or Taboo?

Have had Mrs. Fist's Mackem work mate and family over this afternoon. Once they'd got over their fear of the electric lighting, all went well until the subject of kids shoes was mentioned, when it emerged their wee one has 6 toes on one foot. I had to make a very hasty exit up to the bathroom, and then chewed on a towel until the laughter died off. Think I got away with it.

The bloke out of Boney M will be sampling no more Brown Girls in the Ring. Deed

The man just sees things others don't.

Then again, he's one of them book readers- dodgy.

At least he's not an Islam though, eh?