Coronavirus

[Anorthernsoul 1221]

Edinburgh was once part of Northumbria.

 

 

 

Carry on.

[Alex 30414]

Alaska is the most northerly, westerly and easterly state in the USA. Also the ice cream van, yes THE ICE FUCKING CREAM VAN FFS! Has just pulled into our street. 

[Gemmill 34464]

34 minutes ago, Ayatollah Hermione said:

Had to get the bus home because the walk is fucking hellish uphill and there was a wife on the bus, had to be clearly late 70s. Never known owt like it.

 

What you'd have her walk up the hill that you can't get up yourself, soft shite?

[Gemmill 34464]

2 minutes ago, Alex said:

Alaska is the most northerly, westerly and easterly state in the USA. Also the ice cream van, yes THE ICE FUCKING CREAM VAN FFS! Has just pulled into our street. 

 

Is it not Uncle Buzzcock's Nana? She still mustn't have petrol for her scrambler. 

[Monkeys Fist 38767]

2 minutes ago, PaddockLad said:

 

You sure?....hold that thought, am away to pick the missus up from graft, I’ll address this particular bombshell when I get back,,,

I’ve just checked, it seems Hartlepool centre is further north than Mull of Galloway, by fractions of a degree. 
54.68 and 54.41 respectively. 
Close enough though. 

[Monkeys Fist 38767]

9 minutes ago, Alex said:

Alaska is the most northerly, westerly and easterly state in the USA. Also the ice cream van, yes THE ICE FUCKING CREAM VAN FFS! Has just pulled into our street. 

England is further north, south, east and west than everywhere in Wales. 

[Gemmill 34464]

Lads, you're making me want coronavirus. 

[Ayatollah Hermione 12767]

13 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

What you'd have her walk up the hill that you can't get up yourself, soft shite?

She went two stops, pissflaps! Maybe you can take her round some goji berry flapjacks so she doesn’t have to expose herself to the death flu.

[Gemmill 34464]

Those quinoa Berry muffins are a triumph. Absolute corona busters. I've let Trump know so he can talk about them at his press conference today. 

 

"I gotta tell you. This guy says they work. I dunno, maybe they work. What have we got to lose."

[Dr Gloom 19825]

27 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

Ah! 
I was going to give you the “ Newcastle is further west than Southampton”, but it doesn’t apply to Poole. 
Edinburgh is well west of you though. 
 

 

Can you tell how bored I am?   

Are the shed wanks into double figures yet?

[Monkeys Fist 38767]

I’ve lost the key. 
 

Fucking disaster. 

[trooper 940]

BJ's daily news conference is going to be later than usual as the COBRA meeting is still going on .

[Meenzer 14055]

2 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said:

Fucking disaster. 

 

Depends if you're inside or out.

[trooper 940]

1 minute ago, Meenzer said:

 

Depends if you're inside or out.

@Meenzer have you been for a run today mate was it any quieter ?

[Alex 30414]

Have some soup, Gemmill.

Further to Renton’s concerns about the NHS and complacency, the Newcastle Hospitals Trust is still allowing people to visit patients. Northumberland aren’t. Seems like the sort of thing there should be an overarching policy for 

Edited March 23, 2020 by Alex

[Alex 30414]

7 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said:

Are the shed wanks into double figures yet?

He’s shed two stone. And two balls 

[Alex 30414]

1 minute ago, trooper said:

@Meenzer have you been for a run today mate was it any quieter ?

I love how he’s your roving reporter for all this 

[Gemmill 34464]

1 minute ago, Alex said:

Have some soup, Gemmill.

Further to Renton’s concerns about the NHS and complacency, the Newcastle Hospitals Trust is still allowing people to visit patients. Northumberland aren’t. Seems like the sort of thing there should be a overarching policy for 

 

Had it for lunch man. Tonight is FIESTA RICE. Try eating this fucker without hearing the Desmond's theme tune in your head. 

 

Speaking of hospitals, my pacemaker check letter landed today. 22nd April. Hospitals should be absolutely buzzing by then. 

[Alex 30414]

2 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

Had it for lunch man. Tonight is FIESTA RICE. Try eating this fucker without hearing the Desmond's theme tune in your head. 

 

Speaking of hospitals, my pacemaker check letter landed today. 22nd April. Hospitals should be absolutely buzzing by then. 

You’ll be like Desmond on his return to Trinidad at this rate 

edit: make that Guyana. Lost its impact with that edit tbh

Edited March 23, 2020 by Alex

[Monkeys Fist 38767]

7 minutes ago, Meenzer said:

 

Depends if you're inside or out.

Either way, I’ll be a husk of a man by the end of this. 

[Meenzer 14055]

5 minutes ago, Alex said:

I love how he’s your roving reporter for all this 

 

No run today, I intended to but then things got in the way. Can't have been any busier than at the weekend though, the local park was heaving on Saturday.

[Gemmill 34464]

3 minutes ago, Alex said:

You’ll be like Desmond on his return to Trinidad at this rate 

edit: make that Guyana. Lost its impact with that edit tbh

 

I don't even get the reference. I only watched it for the theme tune and him saying "PORK PIE!" 

[Gemmill 34464]

WEINSTEIN'S GOT IT! 

 

Shit month for him. 

[Alex 30414]

5 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

 

I don't even get the reference. I only watched it for the theme tune and him saying "PORK PIE!" 

The poor fucker who played him returned to his native Guyana on retiring after the show finished it’s run. He collapsed at the airport and never recovered

Edited March 23, 2020 by Alex

[Alex 30414]

4 minutes ago, Gemmill said:

WEINSTEIN'S GOT IT! 

 

Shit month for him. 

Or has he?