Guest alex Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 At the same time.....happy as I am to reciprocate in the oral stakes*, which lads can honestly say they'd be happy dealing with a torrent of God-knows-what at climax? *in principle, though I demand minimum standards of hygiene etc. 115654[/snapback] Oh aye, a turned on lass is a proper turn on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manc-mag 1 Posted April 5, 2006 Author Share Posted April 5, 2006 I've heard there are some women out there who don't like giving head. I find this difficult to believe, surely natural selection would have weened them out by now... It's a strange world. 115523[/snapback] I too find this attitude to blow jobs staggering tbh. I was once at a mate's party when his parents were on holiday. One of his girlfriends mates was there and when everyone fucked off I made my move on her. My mate had said before he went to bed not to fuck her on his parents sofa, (he knew I was gonna work the magic on her) so out of respect to my mate I let her suck me off on the sofa instead. I could tell she wasn't too keen on the art of oral satisfaction although she did a good job overall, being young I assumed she was keen to impress, that was until I spunked in her mouth and she gagged then spat it all out into her hands and ran to the bog. Next day in the pub my mate asked if I shagged her on his parents sofa, I said no but that I wasn't responsible for the stain on the cushion, that as far as i was concerned was her fault for not swallowing! 115630[/snapback] Which leads onto the next question... Why wont some birds swallow the salty goodness? 115634[/snapback] I used to go with a lass from Southampton who'd insist i spunk on her hair cos she reckoned it was really good for it, some nutrients in spunk are the same as in conditioner I think was her arguement, I didn't mind like but one slight misjudgement lead to me spunking right in her eye and then to add insult to injury I stabbed her in the same eye with my weapon as I tried to get my load higher. And then there was a bird I worked with who went to swallow my manly muck and sneezed at the crucial moment resulting in my muck coming out of her nose. She was mortified and never swalllowed again, she didn't last long. 115649[/snapback] The fucking indignation I imagined that last line should be read with. 115652[/snapback] You like your fancy words don't you. Are you a fan of fancy cakes too? Btw, i keep finding myself pissing myself at my desk at work remembering the crawling on all 5 line! The old dried up bints in the office are looking at me like i'm a right numpty. 115656[/snapback] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peasepud 59 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 I eat rug with the best of them, i've never really come across a squirter though. Only one ex from London, and her love juice used to trickle down my balls when she was on top, she didn't let me go down on her, said she didn't get anything out of it, I suspected she had a particularly gnarly minge though. Looking back I never got that close to it to have a gander. 115660[/snapback] Did once, never again it was foookin scary, everything was soaked (and I mean everything, matress, duvet, curtains....) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smooth Operator 10 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 I've heard there are some women out there who don't like giving head. I find this difficult to believe, surely natural selection would have weened them out by now... It's a strange world. 115523[/snapback] I too find this attitude to blow jobs staggering tbh. I was once at a mate's party when his parents were on holiday. One of his girlfriends mates was there and when everyone fucked off I made my move on her. My mate had said before he went to bed not to fuck her on his parents sofa, (he knew I was gonna work the magic on her) so out of respect to my mate I let her suck me off on the sofa instead. I could tell she wasn't too keen on the art of oral satisfaction although she did a good job overall, being young I assumed she was keen to impress, that was until I spunked in her mouth and she gagged then spat it all out into her hands and ran to the bog. Next day in the pub my mate asked if I shagged her on his parents sofa, I said no but that I wasn't responsible for the stain on the cushion, that as far as i was concerned was her fault for not swallowing! 115630[/snapback] Which leads onto the next question... Why wont some birds swallow the salty goodness? 115634[/snapback] I used to go with a lass from Southampton who'd insist i spunk on her hair cos she reckoned it was really good for it, some nutrients in spunk are the same as in conditioner I think was her arguement, I didn't mind like but one slight misjudgement lead to me spunking right in her eye and then to add insult to injury I stabbed her in the same eye with my weapon as I tried to get my load higher. And then there was a bird I worked with who went to swallow my manly muck and sneezed at the crucial moment resulting in my muck coming out of her nose. She was mortified and never swalllowed again, she didn't last long. 115649[/snapback] The fucking indignation I imagined that last line should be read with. 115652[/snapback] You like your fancy words don't you. Are you a fan of fancy cakes too? Btw, i keep finding myself pissing myself at my desk at work remembering the crawling on all 5 line! The old dried up bints in the office are looking at me like i'm a right numpty. 115656[/snapback] 115663[/snapback] They're all HR fuddy duddies, never been fucked in 20 years. Still can't get over the fact that I work in HR either!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
luckyluke 1 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 I've heard there are some women out there who don't like giving head. I find this difficult to believe, surely natural selection would have weened them out by now... It's a strange world. 115523[/snapback] My girlfriend is one of these rare specimens. She's up for pretty much everything else though. As for my type, I'd say brunette and curvy, but these don't always apply. As for the height thing, as long as they're not taller than me I'm happy. 115588[/snapback] Jesus wept. Can't believe you admitted that. Practically makes you gay if you stay with her tbh! I can only imagine your pain at this difficult time. 115612[/snapback] Did you not read the second line? 115648[/snapback] Is there really anything more to life though? You have to ask yourself. I'm reigning this thread back in now with a bit of existentialist philosophy. 115651[/snapback] Good point, but does this mean you value a blowjob the highest prize of all? In the past if it was all I got I considered it more of a consolation tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 But very true, that's the way we think ladies, all men, even if they say different. As a lad, you read magazines, see big knockers and you shoot your muck over them, when you're old enough to pull one of these 'crackers' in a bar, you take them hyem and complete your fantasy. Once or twice is fun, then you get bored, life gets a hold of you, brains and looks etc. become important and all that bollocks. 115586[/snapback] Luckily some of us are blessed with boobs and brains. Just not much height... 115595[/snapback] and like to give head Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manc-mag 1 Posted April 5, 2006 Author Share Posted April 5, 2006 I've heard there are some women out there who don't like giving head. I find this difficult to believe, surely natural selection would have weened them out by now... It's a strange world. 115523[/snapback] My girlfriend is one of these rare specimens. She's up for pretty much everything else though. As for my type, I'd say brunette and curvy, but these don't always apply. As for the height thing, as long as they're not taller than me I'm happy. 115588[/snapback] Jesus wept. Can't believe you admitted that. Practically makes you gay if you stay with her tbh! I can only imagine your pain at this difficult time. 115612[/snapback] Did you not read the second line? 115648[/snapback] Is there really anything more to life though? You have to ask yourself. I'm reigning this thread back in now with a bit of existentialist philosophy. 115651[/snapback] Good point, but does this mean you value a blowjob the highest prize of all? In the past if it was all I got I considered it more of a consolation tbh. 115667[/snapback] No but a good one takes some beating. I don't know when you stopped believing Luke, but I feel sorry for you. People on here are literally laughing at you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manc-mag 1 Posted April 5, 2006 Author Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] All sounds very passive on your part if you dont mind me saying tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] All sounds very passive on your part if you dont mind me saying tbh. 115687[/snapback] are you Dr Ruth by any chance? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] All sounds very passive on your part if you dont mind me saying tbh. 115687[/snapback] It's more that I feel I am receiving a generous gift Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manc-mag 1 Posted April 5, 2006 Author Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] All sounds very passive on your part if you dont mind me saying tbh. 115687[/snapback] It's more that I feel I am receiving a generous gift 115695[/snapback] Charitable donation I'd call it, slap heed! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] All sounds very passive on your part if you dont mind me saying tbh. 115687[/snapback] It's more that I feel I am receiving a generous gift 115695[/snapback] Charitable donation I'd call it, slap heed! 115696[/snapback] Don't mock the afflicted! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smooth Operator 10 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] Me too. It takes me ages to come from a blow job unless the bird is a true connoisseur of oral fulfillment. Once pulled a lass who was staying in the hotel i was working night shift in, she was sucking me off for an hour before she got lock jaw and decided to sit on my face instead. Who was I to stop her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
manc-mag 1 Posted April 5, 2006 Author Share Posted April 5, 2006 Prefer getting a shag to a blowjob tbh. Not averse to either like 115682[/snapback] Me too. It takes me ages to come from a blow job unless the bird is a true connoisseur of oral fulfillment. Once pulled a lass who was staying in the hotel i was working night shift in, she was sucking me off for an hour before she got lock jaw and decided to sit on my face instead. Who was I to stop her? 115698[/snapback] More Gold! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 S-O is a fucking comic genius What's more, I get the feeling he's telling the truth, at least some of the time Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden McGroin 4924 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Which leads onto the next question... Why wont some birds swallow the salty goodness? 115634[/snapback] Next time you have a wank, jizz into a cup and then down it in one. Then come back and ask the question again.... 115659[/snapback] Nothing to do with taste. Just manners imo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smooth Operator 10 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 S-O is a fucking comic genius What's more, I get the feeling he's telling the truth, at least some of the time 115702[/snapback] I'm telling the truth all of the time, these stories are true, hence my reputation and nickname! A bit of advice, even if it's just for a short period you should all work as a night porter in a city centre hotel. The situations you can find yourself in are incredible. Like when I was bucking a lass in her room and my pager went off so i used this lasses room phone to answer the pager, itwas my fucking lass asking if she could come in for a shag in the jacuzzi. She was at the door in nowt but a overcoat! So I shoot my muck faster than a speeding bullet and hot footed it down to let her in before one of Gateshead finest snatched her of the street. She couldn't understand why I couldn't get it up for her and thought i mustn't fancy her anymore. Took me half an hour to get hard! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Which leads onto the next question... Why wont some birds swallow the salty goodness? 115634[/snapback] Next time you have a wank, jizz into a cup and then down it in one. Then come back and ask the question again.... 115659[/snapback] Nothing to do with taste. Just manners imo 115707[/snapback] Manners?! You should be fucking grateful she's putting your knob in her mouth in the first place! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 3229 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Midget Gems Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden McGroin 4924 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 S-O is a fucking comic genius What's more, I get the feeling he's telling the truth, at least some of the time 115702[/snapback] I'm telling the truth all of the time, these stories are true, hence my reputation and nickname! A bit of advice, even if it's just for a short period you should all work as a night porter in a city centre hotel. The situations you can find yourself in are incredible. Like when I was bucking a lass in her room and my pager went off so i used this lasses room phone to answer the pager, itwas my fucking lass asking if she could come in for a shag in the jacuzzi. She was at the door in nowt but a overcoat! So I shoot my muck faster than a speeding bullet and hot footed it down to let her in before one of Gateshead finest snatched her of the street. She couldn't understand why I couldn't get it up for her and thought i mustn't fancy her anymore. Took me half an hour to get hard! 115709[/snapback] You are on fire today Smoothie. Shuold have just munched her out for a bit while awaiting El Stiffy (as they say in Spain) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden McGroin 4924 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 (edited) Nothing to do with taste. Just manners imo 115707[/snapback] Manners?! You should be fucking grateful she's putting your knob in her mouth in the first place! 115710[/snapback] Privileged tbh Edited April 5, 2006 by Holden McGroin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 Which leads onto the next question... Why wont some birds swallow the salty goodness? 115634[/snapback] Next time you have a wank, jizz into a cup and then down it in one. Then come back and ask the question again.... 115659[/snapback] Nothing to do with taste. Just manners imo 115707[/snapback] it has everything to do with taste actually its extremely varying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holden McGroin 4924 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 it has everything to do with taste actually its extremely varying 115717[/snapback] Please.....go on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toonraider 0 Posted April 5, 2006 Share Posted April 5, 2006 it has everything to do with taste actually its extremely varying 115717[/snapback] Please.....go on. 115720[/snapback] nothing else to say really sperm can vary considerably in taste and consistency....and for once now im lost for words! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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