Jimbo

opinion, not fact.

The manUre shirt looks like something Charlton Athletic were probably wearing in 1986.

Assumed you already had..... 157497[/snapback] No, but I'm considering it for my next contract negotiations, after all, smokers are catered for on site, why not wankers ? Designated wanking areas, with kleenex and visual material. *reminds me of that sketch on Big Train.

I think I should have it writen into my contract.

Owen injury nightmare rocks club and country From George Caulkin and Matt Dickinson, in Baden-Baden MICHAEL OWEN is expected to miss the whole of next season after a setback in his recovery from the knee injury he sustained at the World Cup finals. The Newcastle United striker had hoped to return early next year, but he will now be out for at least ten months. It is a huge blow to the forward, to England and to his club, who paid a club-record fee of £16 million to sign him from Real Madrid last summer. He made only 11 appearances last season after fracturing his metatarsal and is unlikely to play at all in the forthcoming campaign after the main operation to repair his right knee was delayed by eight weeks. Glenn Roeder, the Newcastle manager, has been left badly short of strikers and Steve McClaren will have to plan without England’s pre-eminent goalscorer. The new head coach is also awaiting Fifa’s verdict on Wayne Rooney’s suspension, with the world governing body due to announce by Sunday how many matches Rooney will miss at the start of the Euro 2008 qualifying campaign. * Rooney has protested that he did not intend to stamp on Ricardo Carvalho during England’s defeat by Portugal in the World Cup quarter-final, but Fifa’s view of that incident was made abundantly clear yesterday when Horacio Elizondo, the Argentine referee who sent off Rooney, was given the honour of officiating at Sunday’s final between Italy and France in Berlin. Markus Merk, the German, and Lubos Michel, of Slovakia, had been favourites, but Elizondo’s handling of the England game clearly impressed Fifa. His decision to dismiss Rooney has been publicly backed by Sepp Blatter, the Fifa president, and the forward faces a ban of two or three matches. At least Rooney will be back in England colours a long time before Owen. He flew to Denver on Monday to see Dr Richard Steadman, the surgeon who has operated on the knees of top sportsmen across many fields, including Ronaldo, Greg Norman and Joe Montana. Owen was expected to undergo an operation to repair the right anterior cruciate ligament, which ruptured less than a minute into England’s 2-2 draw against Sweden, but surgery on Wednesday revealed damage to the lateral cartilages. With work on those required to be carried out first, the cruciate operation will be delayed for two months. Owen, 26, will return to Newcastle next week to continue his rehabilitation and will have to return to the US for more surgery at the start of August. Newcastle’s season kicks off with an Intertoto Cup tie in just eight days’ time and Roeder will not be spoilt for choice of strikers after Alan Shearer’s retirement and Owen’s injury. Unless he can make a quick purchase he has only Albert Luque, James Milner and a semi-fit Shola Ameobi at his disposal. Interest in Dirk Kuyt, of Feyenoord, is thought to have cooled, while Newcastle have been warned off an approach for Darren Bent, of Charlton Athletic. Ruud van Nistelrooy, unsettled at Old Trafford, and Jermain Defoe, who is not guaranteed a starting place at Tottenham Hotspur, are targets, but Roeder does not have a sufficient budget. Upset at losing his most precious asset to an injury sustained on international duty, Freddy Shepherd, the Newcastle chairman, had already instructed the club’s lawyers to investigate the matter of compensation. Owen earns in excess of £100,000 a week and the Football Association’s insurance policy covers only a proportion of the player’s wages. The club, who made their own additional insurance arrangements, are examining their legal position, but Fifa has indicated that its £6 million compensation fund is intended to provide for players whose associations or clubs have not taken out a policy.

I heard it too, another "trophy signing".

Comic Davidson declared bankrupt Davidson hosted seven series of The Generation Game for the BBC Comedian Jim Davidson has been declared bankrupt after failing to keep up payments on a £1.4m tax bill. The 52-year-old comic said he had been struggling to meet payments of about £400,000 a year, but that HM Revenue & Customs refused to negotiate. Davidson, who lives in Dubai, said he wanted to finish paying off the bill, now down to about £700,000, but had been "forced into this position". A Revenue & Customs spokesman said it could not comment on specific cases. "This is kind of a shock to me," Davidson told the BBC News website. "The tax man has, for reasons best known to himself, pulled the rug out from under my feet. "I am still pretty solvent. I just can't pay £700,000 right now." He said he had been left unable to pay the £1.4m bill about four years ago owing to the expense of the earlier divorce from his fourth wife, Tracy Hilton. His income then decreased sharply after he left the BBC's primetime Saturday show The Generation Game in 2002. Davidson said he had been performing two UK tours a year to maintain annual repayments but he and his manager had felt that could not continue. "You cannot keep going back to the same theatres," he said. "I don't want the tax man to put me in a position where my career looks as if it is failing, because it isn't." He said Revenue & Customs refused his request to take a 12-month break from payments. It also refused his offer of a final payment of about £450,000, he said. Angry "I wanted to pay my debts - I still do. I have paid the majority of this off," Davidson said. "I wanted to be honest with the tax man - I offered to sell everything I have got. I just needed a bit of leeway. This is an old bill I have been struggling to pay off." He added: "The taxman has forced me into this position - that's why I feel angry rather than sad and disappointed." Davidson has appeared extensively on television, including as presenter of BBC's Big Break and The Generation Game. He founded the British Forces Foundation charity in 1999 that funds entertainment for British troops worldwide. He was made an OBE in 2001 for his services to charity.

Apparently, I died on the Titanic ! http://www.encyclopedia-titanica.org/biography/2171/

Wigan's £5.5m Heskey bid accepted Wigan are set to break their transfer record after a £5.5m bid for Birmingham striker Emile Heskey was accepted. A statement on Blues' website confirmed the offer had been agreed for the 28-year-old former England player, who is now discussing personal terms. Wigan manager Paul Jewell also inquired about signing Robbie Savage, 31, from Blackburn but was told the Wales midfielder was not for sale. Jewell said the club were targeting "top Premiership performers". Wigan are desperate to land a proven striker after selling Jason Roberts to Blackburn for £3m and missing out in the chase for Andrew Johnson, who joined Everton from Crystal Palace in May. Their previous record transfer fee was the £3.1m paid to Wolves for Henri Camara last summer. Jewell said: "Emile is a proven performer at Premiership and international level and we have made what we consider to be a very good offer to Birmingham City. "It is not normal for this club to comment on targets until the player has signed but in this instance it's an open secret that we've made the bid. "I think he's a player who could do very well for us but we'll see how the situation develops. "I'm still very confident we will get the five or six new players we want by the beginning of the season."

Why would anyone consider bringing him back 156908[/snapback] I wouldn't advocate bring him back but i'd say he's better than Ameobi and likely to play more than Owen, to some that might be reason enough !

http://www.toontastic.net/forum/index.php?showtopic=6735

Should have been the Mexican tbh

Cannavaro for me, he's been superb.

NEWCASTLE United have confirmed Michael Owen will undergo a two-stage procedure to repair the knee ligament damage sustained while on World Cup duty with England. The Magpies' record signing ruptured the anterior cruciate ligament in his right knee while representing his country against Sweden in June. On Monday, Michael and United club doctor Roddy McDonald travelled across to America to visit Dr Richard Steadman at his clinic in Vale, Colorado. When the world-renowned specialist examined Michael's knee on Wednesday morning he discovered there was also some slight lateral cartilage damage that needed to be repaired first. That work was successfully carried out and the 26-year-old can now begin rehabilitation work on that part of his injury. Newcastle physio Derek Wright will fly across to America to work alongside the clinic's rehab team with Michael before they return to Tyneside next week. Michael will then return to Dr Steadman's base in around eight weeks time for the second part of the procedure, which will be to repair his ruptured anterior cruiciate. Manager Glenn Roeder told nufc.co.uk: "I spoke to our club doctor Roddy McDonald after the first stage of the procedure had been done, and he explained to me what the second stage would involve and that it could take place in eight weeks time."

Are you sure they didn't say: "Sorry, no riff-raff"

One suggestion I heard was to abolish draws in all matches even in domestic football, and have a penalty shoot out decide the winner, so that a penalty shoot out isn't such a shock to the system during international tournaments.

feel free, its not mine !

50 Cent

Not bad taste, just bad..... A married couple was on a Cruise that stopped in Jamaica. They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such when they passed this small sandal shop. From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say, "You . . foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop!" So the married couple walked in. The Jamaican said to them, "I have some special sandals I think you would be intrested in. Dey make you wild at sex." The wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being the "Sex-God" that he was.... The husband asked the man, "How could sandals make you into a sex freak?" The Jamaican replied, "Just try dem on, Mon." The husband, after some badgering from his wife, finally gave in, and tried them on. As soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his eyes, something his wife hadn't seen in many years! In the blink of an eye, the husband grabbed the Jamaican, bent him violently over a table, yanked down his pants, ripped down his own pants, and grabbed a firm hold of the Jamaican's hips and shag's the arse off him. The Jamaican then began screaming, "YOU GOT DEM ON DE WRONG FEET, MON! YOU GOT DEM ON DE WRONG FEET..!!!!"

They just showed it on SKY Sports news too, I bet he's delighted !!

jesus wept http://www.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,30000-13531469,00.html

MADRID, July 5 (Reuters) - Dutch striker Patrick Kluivert has been told to look for another team after being left out of the squad for Valencia's pre-season training camp in the Netherlands. Italian trio Marco Di Vaio, Bernardo Corradi and Stefano Fiore as well as Spanish midfielder Francisco Rufete were also omitted from the squad as they too are deemed surplus to requirements by coach Quique Sanchez Flores. "They will all start training later and during the intervening period they will be given time to look for another team," Sanchez Flores told reporters on Wednesday. Former Barcelona striker Kluivert has been plagued by injuries since joining Valencia from Newcastle United last June. His move to the Primera Liga club was originally delayed for three weeks because of a problem in his left knee that was detected in the medical. He eventually completed the move, but subsequently suffered a series of problems in his right knee which required surgery in February. He played just 202 minutes of league football for Valencia in the season. Valencia's signing of Fernando Morientes and the fine form of David Villa, who was the top Spanish striker in the Primera Liga last season, mean that the club no longer requires the Dutchman.