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I can fucking destroy crisps too. I'll challenge you to a crisp-off some time. We'll be hospitalised from all the salt and vinegar inflaming the crisp-inflicted cuts and welts in our mouths.

What about turkey-flavour crisps? (Grand work, both. )

Aye, I'd got pretty massive like. To mix up my measurement systems, I reckon I'm still about a stone heavier than I was back then, Renton.

Mediocrity in depth.

I often do that anyway, it's one of the advantages of being a non-threatening type.

What Gemmill says aye, you've got to be a bit selfish, same as I have no problem with my fella sprinting on ahead while I plod around the park at my own pace. Might pull rank if he came close to lapping me, mind. Can't be doing with Weight Watchers like, I know how nutrition works and I'm down 23kg since December, I've just been indulging too much recently. "Tasty food is tasty" shocker, basically. Plus I still have that "once I start I can't stop" mentality, it's just less damaging when it's a multipack of Mini Cheddars instead of a bottle of no-brand vodka. Aye, that was definitely a concern, you worry that your friends might turn out to be total dickheads and that you must also have been a dickhead over the years when drunk. Turns out everyone's been dead canny though (except The Fish who's a knob even when he's sober, obviously). It's all going fine really, there's plenty of random drinks you can have when you're out to keep things interesting (except if you're in the kind of pub that only has Carling and Heineken as its draught lagers, in which case are they fuck going to have anything more interesting than Diet Coke and tonic water), and the caffeine and sugar "hangovers" are punishment enough at this age, frankly.

All of them, then?

Hit a plateau recently because I've been eating all kinds of crap, so I've started using MyFitnessPal again to keep me honest. It won't last (I usually get bored of it after a week or two) but it's good for a little discipline boost every so often. Second Parkrun this morning (skipped last week because I'd jarred my knee), still a right old plod but the main thing is it's happening, I guess.

People with no self-awareness about how loud they're being, e.g. (to cite an example completely at random) during the quiet parts of a gig

Exactly that here too (well, Tesco, but same rationale), plus there's a really good cheap 'n' cheerful fruit and veg market near here - the markup the supermarkets make on that kind of thing is eye-watering sometimes... Wouldn't trust the supermarkets to give me decent fresh stuff when ordering online, though I think Tesco at least have "4+ days fresh" guarantees and things like that on some items?

It's the beauty of European football!

https://twitter.com/_JaydeTaylor/status/492269017215012864/

I'll have you know there's some perfectly average restuarants down there too.

"I think there's a cherry tomato up there..."

It's been brilliant man. Rubbish music, Rod Stewart, occasional Children In Need appeals, John fucking Barrowman, appalling team costumes, Guernsey walking in to the sound of Aphex Twin...

http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2013/11/18/guy-walks-into-a-bar

Dr. Doilumopoulos.

Already under construction

Paul Hogan, Shane Warne, Natalie Imbruglia, Yahoo Serious, your boys took one hell of a beating!

Lass I knew at school is moaning on Facebook that a shop in Fenham only had Coke bottles with "non-British" names like Haroon, Vijay and... Angharad. I suppose someone had better tell her...

It could always be worse. https://twitter.com/WalterLinovich/status/491564307579404288/