GeordieMessiah

Aye, Richard and Judy was a shit guess/stab in the dark really. You're closer to the truth I reckon. Although I reckon this one could be a windup by young Walliver... GM in "shit stabbing in the dark" admission!

Aye, Richard and Judy was a shit guess/stab in the dark really. You're closer to the truth I reckon. Although I reckon this one could be a windup by young Walliver...

What's all this about Gemma Atkinson having ego problems? I guess I must have missed something, tbh...

Oh....sorry...that was directed at GM wasn't it?! Quit with dat Donkey Kong shit, Gemmil fool?!

Where did Bella Emberg come in at? And more flippantly, where did Janet Street-Porter rank?

See you there then, Mancy.

Watch it and weep! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1NLIAJGLkk Classic.

What the fuck are Richard and Judy up to now?

Byron Stingily - Get Up (Everybody) Felix - It's Me Ralphi Rosario - You Used To Hold Me The Blow Monkeys -La Passionara Aphex Twin - Flim Gat Decor - Passion

Imagine the turbulence when he's in the bogs man. I dont think he fits in the bogs. Shits in a sick bag, and hands it to the stewardess with a smile.

So can I.

I thought it was July... I may be wrong though. Anyone else?

Your presence is liable to take the plane down tbh. Reminds me...I was once on this plane for a business trip from Edinburgh to Southampton and I was sat at the front, on the left hand side. The plane was quite empty and this cheeky air steward (a big gayer, of course) came up to me and said, quite loudly, and totally deadpan: "Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to move to the middle of the plane. The captain's concerned about the weight distribution for take-off" I was a bit taken aback, and said: "Really?" At which point the entire cabin crew start pissing themselves laughing. Cunts. * (*sorry Cath!)

I'm too tall (and too fat) to get into a brace position. If I'm ever on a plane heading for the Earth at 200mph + and I'm told to get into the brace position I'm going to just unbuckle the seat belt, get up and run up and down the aisle screaming like a gayer instead. Much more stylish way to go, tbh.

Fizz is gorgeous. I'd do her for sure. Beggars can't be choosers

Strictly speaking Birds and Reptiles have a common orifice for waste products and sex/eggs which I don't think is the equivalent of the mammalian fanny. Fop-tastic!

Could just leave a song instead... Mama, I just killed a man Put a gun against his head Pulled my trigger, now he's dead Mama, life had just begun But now I've gone and thrown it all away Mama oo-oo-oo-ooh! Didnt mean to make you cry If I'm not back again this time tomorrow Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters Too late, my time has come, Sends shivers down my spine Bodys aching all the time Goodbye everybody - I've got to go Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth Mama oo-oo-oo-ooh (any way the wind blows) I don't want to die I sometimes wish Id never been born at all I see a little silhouetto of a man Scaramouche, scaramouche will you do the fandango? Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening me! Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo Galileo, Figaro Magnifico-o-o-o-o! But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me He's just a poor boy from a poor family Spare him his life from this monstrosity Easy come easy go, will you let me go? Bismillah! No, we will not let you go! Let him go! Bismillah! We will not let you go! Let him go! Bismillah! We will not let you go! Let me go! Will not let you go - let me go! Will not let you go -let me go! No,no,no,no,no,no,no!! O Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go! Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me! So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye? So you think you can love me and leave me to die? Oh baby, can't do this to me baby! Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here Nothing really matters, Anyone can see, Nothing really matters Nothing really matters to me! Any way the wind blows....

Who is Sima?

Sadly that won't work. It's electric and I reckon the heating filament is fucked. Oh well, no matter - means I don't have to go into the office today at least.

Wacky Jnr everyone... Toontastic's very own Fred Dineage!

What's going on mister? 1. General despondency arising from my current work situation plus a few health related concerns. Just been a shit couple of weeks. 2. Am "working from home" this morning - waiting for another plumber to come sort out my boiler. Turning into a right saga this one. 3. Have just been speaking to my line manager, getting permission to "work from home" - he's just told me he's leaving next Friday (voluntary redundancy) - this is REALLY fucking terrible news for me like - cos he's a legend and has been protecting me from the insanities of the Chief Exec. 4. Still it's Friday! So that means the job section in the Scotsman and the Herald up here. Time to trawl through the recruitment pages and reinforce my impending sense of doom and depression. 5. Fuck me. I need a drink. And only 10.30 in the morning too.

Yeah! I blame Renton too. Let's all blame RENTON! Yeah!!

Fizz is gorgeous. I'd do her for sure.

"Dave" is a great name.