Alex

Fuck's sake. Hope he's ok.

Spot on re: 'Pards'. Speaking of which I bet he's back in full bespectacled 'intellectual' mode this week.

With the caveat that you had to be your nation's title winners (or winners of the previous year's competition) to get into it. We were nowhere near good enough to win the league when we won the Fairs Cup. It was still a brilliant achievement though. Your argument holds water however. The Uefa Cup in its old incarnation was the hardest European competition to win too before the European Cup expansion/Champions League. The entry criteria can't be ignored at the same time.

Like Obertan was a Carr signing

I believe the bit where he says he didn't pre-write any of it.

I like Bairstow as the WK. Seems to be just nailing down the position and we need some stability in the batting order. I appreciate the arguments for moving him up though but Buttler has failed to convince as a test batsman. Early in his career I know but I just think Bairstow should be given a run there. Also I know his county form has been great but I think it's worth remembering he's also kept wicket (albeit batting at 5 I think). I think there's something to the theory that, a bit like being an all-rounder, having a second string to your bow takes some of the pressure off your batting. Especially at test level. I don't think he's really looked the part coming in higher up the order in test matches as a specialist batsman either. tl/dr, if it ain't broken, don't fix it

Writing for his audience tbf

The only good thing about them winning the European Cup that year is that Owen had just left the club to try and win the European Cup.

The lack of self-awareness is hilarious like. I know it's meant to be a wind-up but given the OTT fanfare surrounding the 'achievements' of Allardyce. In his 30 games he got them 3 places higher in the league (they were bottom iirc) and they accrued two more points than us in the same period. Given how fucking awful we were then perhaps they should wind it in a bit. No doubt in Steve Bruce Martin O'Neill Paolo Di Canio Gus Poyet Dick Advocaat Sam Allardyce they have the manager with which they can build on survival and kick on next season.

250 might be a decent score like.

And that bit was tongue-in-cheek

I think he deserves some credit. It's difficult to be that boring and that much of a cunt at the same time.

Don't whistle the theme to The Good, The Bad and The Ugly when he walks on stage

You know the English summer has truly arrived when you get your first batting collapse.

He became, in effect, Director of Football, despite his title. Another case of Ashley promoting someone above and beyond their abilities. Good scout with a decent track record (not just here) but shouldn't have been a board member. He had a lot of influence with the owner and his relationship with McClaren was not only instrumental in the latter getting his job but also in holding onto it too long. Although how Charnley has seemingly managed to dodge a bullet is anyone's guess.

He's in a quiz question - supposedly the only bloke to have played in every round (including all the qualifying rounds) of the cup

Good mates with Veronica Dribblethwaite apparently.

What is it about people from Wearside and impersonating serial killers?

Ooh, controversial

Bad way to end that post given some of what has gone before

He took Monday off

Originally Sammy Lee I think.

The thought process. Not that it would even hold up to much scrutiny. Surprised Gemmill hasn't suggested telling her about the impending global environmental apocalypse and how it wouldn't be right to bring a kid into a world like that