Monkeys Fist

Calm down Bruce.

Took the third viewing before I noticed the old bird riding her spazmobile in her slippers

Eh?

In that case, I will die fulfilled.

Didn't we pay under £1Million for Rob Lee?

A very particular shaped tree allowed you to hang your arse over the edge and do an extended squat. re. Sitting- Due to a combination of a very healthy diet and the almost perfect optimum shitting position, an immaculate phantom wipe was achieved. It was near 800 ft- plenty of time to admire your work as it descended to oblivion.

You'll probably do well to follow the Fish's sage advice then. Forth (500yds to the right from your hotel) Up to Tilleys on Westgate rd( turn right out of the Forth, up the lane, crossing Grainger St, then up the lane and to the left 100yds) On to Stowell st- bait and or beer (Rosie's) - straight across from Tilleys, 200 yes on the right, through the old city walls. Final slackener at the Strawberry, right in front of the Gallowgate End.

Classic https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLQ8rsiuRFXZ8fFbeSXtK1mQjffgxcTe9b

It's about time he (J69) had another name change tbh. I propose Flehmen Response.

("Looks lovely,pet. Shows off your figure......" )

Ouch.

Where would you and the Jizz Trombones guys recommend?

Eau de Colon?

Champagne facial?

Wasn't it The Jolly Felcher?

Top 20 poll from The Mag (2013 though) http://www.themag.co.uk/2013/07/top-twenty-newcastle-united-pubs-in-newcastle-named/

Ages ago, he made claims to be ex-forces, which I seem to recall came unstuck fairly swiftly. Can't remember where/when though.

Yes

The Strawberry is right beside the ground, will be packed but good ales. Haven't been in the Trent in ages, but it's 2 minutes from the ground- see above for ales and busyness. Bar 9 and Shark Bar are very close if you are fond of bars full of Spunk Trumpets. Edit; The Percy in Haymarket is 3-4 minutes from the ground, having said all of the above, most all the Haymarket/Gallowgate bars are no more than 5 minutes from the ground. Enjoy.

Carrying on with that kind of shit is precisely why your back door is no longer watertight.

Get yer Mam to buy one.