Monkeys Fist

The Strawberry is right beside the ground, will be packed but good ales. Haven't been in the Trent in ages, but it's 2 minutes from the ground- see above for ales and busyness. Bar 9 and Shark Bar are very close if you are fond of bars full of Spunk Trumpets. Edit; The Percy in Haymarket is 3-4 minutes from the ground, having said all of the above, most all the Haymarket/Gallowgate bars are no more than 5 minutes from the ground. Enjoy.

Carrying on with that kind of shit is precisely why your back door is no longer watertight.

Get yer Mam to buy one.

All this "coward" patter from our resident serial killer- wasn't he shown up as a Walter on here?

Greensides?

Just got back from fixing Catmags leaky rear entrance. Tried bunging everything I had in it to seal it up, but it was just too big a crack. End up smashing it. ( If anyone needs me I'm at the sports massage clinic having my wrists seen to).

" Send me to Whickham!" "Only if you Swalwell, love "

Snoop " This nigga crazier than the shit I got on my head"

What's it like working with Wykikitoon?

And a spangly new VW

No. of people who witnessed the cliff dump- me, a few cicadas, maybe the odd snake. No. of people who witnessed Ewerk's equine strapadichtomy - the entire village plus passing cast of Ballykissangel.

This from Ewerk, the public bondage freak.

20 minutes in, whips out his phone to show some lass his baby. Instantly surrounded by 10 more cooing nurses all squeezing round to see the Nipper. J69....

True story.

" Tenner for your knickers, pet. "

I once had a shit off an 800ft cliff and watched it all the way down- imagine this with a chod instead of Wile Coyote. 3-1 to the Papa Laz's.

It's up to you to set the tone Scoobos. Turn up in a back-to-front mankini with a bottle of Thunderbird on an IV drip.

https://mobile.twitter.com/iGitz_/status/799941919576985600?s=04 https://twitter.com/iGitz_/status/799941919576985600/video/1

The new Andy Goram?

Fucking get in! Beating the shite out of the European Champions.

A Roman walks in to a bar, holds up two fingers and says " Five beers please".