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Hello everyone, peaceful hammer here! I write for blowing bubbles fanzine and ahead of our game next month I would love to do a Q&A with some of the fans for a feature in the fanzine. Please drop a comment on this post if you are interested and I will personal message you. Thank you!

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2 minutes ago, PaddockLad said:

Hammers calling Glenn Roeder "tumor boy" when we beat your lot at Upton Park when he was our manager was a fuckin disgrace :cuppa:

 

Not all Hammers have said this and it goes to show they aren't proper West Ham fans. Sorry on behalf of them. If this post interests you to do a quick Q&A feel free. Thank you!

 

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3 minutes ago, ewerk said:

Think of all the free promotion for the finest NUFC podcast out there.

You think Besty, Waugh and Caulkin will want a heads up about this then?

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16 minutes ago, Oliviaelliott said:

Just a friendly 20 year old girl trying to create content for next months issue.

Lads… I’m going to cut out the middleman and just put myself on The List. :lol:

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6 minutes ago, The Fish said:

You think Besty, Waugh and Caulkin will want a heads up about this then?

I was more thinking there might have been a free 'Ladies' Night' tshirt in it for you.

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26 minutes ago, Oliviaelliott said:

 

We don't pay and I don't get paid for it either. You get a copy of the fanzine. Any help would be greatly appreciated! 

 

What other visitors have usually done is post the list of questions in the thread - once the piss-taking has died down you’ll generally get some decent responses, although I would guess that at present enthusiasm might be a tad weak, thanks to our beloved cabbage-headed manager and his world-beating tactical nous. 

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2 hours ago, Oliviaelliott said:

 

Not all Hammers have said this and it goes to show they aren't proper West ham fans.

 

 

I love this trope, footballs the absolute worst for it. Someone a acts like a twat? Theyre not a real /thing that associates them with me/

 

know them personally and theyre alright? Make excuses and call them a proper football man instead.

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2 hours ago, Dr Gloom said:

yeah, post the questions and i'll have a bash at answering them. you're in luck - it should be your most comfortable game of the season. 

Thank you so much! A couple of sentences for each would be perfect. Thanks again 

 

Newcastle

 

Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham?

 

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are?

 

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season?

 

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for?

 

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll?

 

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through?

 

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season?

 

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans?

 

Do you think you will stay up this season?

 

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham?

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Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham?

don't really know much about you, tbh. i have pretty much lost interest in football more broadly the last few years, beaten into submission by mike ashley. antonio looks a decent player from what i've seen. fwiw, soucek has got me loads of fantasy football points

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are?

well you looked dog shit when we played you first game of the season but the moyes-siah has clearly done a good job since then. don't watch enough of you to comment really, but you must be happy with how your season has turned out. 

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season?

relegation beckons. we might have had a chance but mike ashley thinks steve bruce is the man, so...

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for?

ASM, almiron and wilson. luckily for you, they're all injured. 

if you fancy a laugh, watch out for our £40m signing joelinton

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll?

no, he's a busted flush, as you lot know all too well, and ashley decided to extend his contrat

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through?

mixed emotions. i would have loved to see the end of ashley, but storming to the title on saudi money would have left a sour taste. not that i'd have been that bothered - ask man city fans

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season?

the biggest struggle for newcastle fans has been watching the team. the biggest struggle for the players has been steve bruce - a total fraud

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans?

and then some. he's fucking clueless and a terrible, terrible person to boot 

Do you think you will stay up this season?

no. and it will be deserved. if i were a neutral i'd be willing us down. mike ashley and steve bruce are shit stains on the PL. hopefully allardyce goes down with us

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham?

2-0 to west ham

Edited by Dr Gloom
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Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham?    Bobby Moore
 

 

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are?  They work well in a team but can also work individually- they are highly motivated and willing to learn new skills. 

 

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season?  :lol:

 

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for?  Joelinton- some of your lads might mistake him for a footballer and waste their time marking him. 

 

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll? He brings balance to the squad as we had two empty seats on the left end of the bench but only one at the right end- no longer a problem. 

 

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through?  5.6

 

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season?  Finding a reliable source of Beef Monster Munch for Bruce 

 

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans?   He hasn’t got any fans. 

 

Do you think you will stay up this season? Not without Kamagra 

 

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham?   Eleventy Ten

 

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1 hour ago, Oliviaelliott said:

Thank you so much! A couple of sentences for each would be perfect. Thanks again 

 

Newcastle

 

Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham?

Miguel Antonio looks a canny player. 

 

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are?

West Ham seem a solid outfit with decent players, it's hard to find a weakness given how bad Newcastle have been in comparison. 

 

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season?

I think we'll get relegated, we have a chance of staying up if they ditch Bruce but it's still a tall order. 

 

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for?

Wilson, St Maximin, Almiron are normally decent but they're all injured. Watch Joelinton for comedy value.

 

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll?

IInitially I was happy but the truth is he's robbing a living. 

 

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through?

I never expected it to go ahead, so It felt quite normal.

 

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season?

It's a toss up between defending, 'transitioning' & attacking. 

 

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans?

Yes - he's the worst manager we've had in the premier league by some margin & all he ever does is blame other people. 

 

Do you think you will stay up this season?

No 

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham?

Newcastle United 0-2 Ham 


(press expand for answers)

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Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham?

 

Can't answer your questions as I haven't watched enough of you as the PL generally bores the tits off me. I only watch NUFC as it's been hardwired into me for nearly forty years.

 

 

 

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are?

Karen Brady and the dildo brothers piss me off quite a bit, especially Brady. They're a weakness. A strength? I don't know, I've never minded West Ham so there must be something there although the ground move has took something away. 

 

 

 

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season?

We'll be shit, poor to watch and it'll be a slow car crash whether we go down as our three best offensive players are all injured so where will the goals come from? The manager is the biggest worry even when they're back.

 

 

 

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for?

Nobody at present.

 

 

 

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll?

No, especially his contract getting renewed another year. A desperate move by a club who hate signing players. 

 

 

 

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through?

Gutted we've still got Ashley, absolutely gutted. I can't put across how poisonous the last 15 years have been and how much he's sucked the life out of the club. I didn't like the idea of who was going to buy us one iota and it wouldn't have sat well at all.

 

 

 

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season?

The holy trinity of Ashley, Charnley and Bruce.

 

 

 

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans?

My first game was in 1983, he's very much a contender for the worst full time manager we've ever had in my time of following us. We all knew what was coming but he's been even worse. I didn't expect the petulance and the massive pet lip. Out of his depth a decade ago never mind now. 

 

 

 

Do you think you will stay up this season?

It depends how long Wilson, Almiron and ASM are out for and whether the duck egg helps them break down by rushing them back.

 

 

 

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham?

Always fancy us against you but we'll need those players back, even then it's 50/50 at best. Without them there's no chance of anything unless you're total shit on the day and can't be arsed.

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the one thing i wanted to ask was whether rice is overrated? there's been a lot of hype but whenever i'ver seen him, the first name that came to mind was jermaine jenas - flattering to deceive in other words. i probably haven't seen enough of him - am i being overly critical? 

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16 hours ago, Oliviaelliott said:

Thank you so much! A couple of sentences for each would be perfect. Thanks again 

 

Newcastle

Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham? I like Antonio, and Soucek, but Lingard has been a revelation for you , 

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are? You don't press well. But overall I don't see huge weaknesses.

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season? Either go down, or survive by the skin of our teeth. Not much enjoyment either way. 

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for? Normally I'd say Wilson, Almiron or ASM, but they're all out. Willock might be a dangerous player, but Bruce doesn't know how to set up a team, so... I dunno? Carroll if he comes off the bench for more than 30 seconds might injure one of your players?

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll? Not really. Either he's not up to it, or Bruce doesn't trust him. Either way it's a waste of money and a squad place.

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through? I was gutted that Ashley retained ownership. I'd prefer not to be owned by murderers.

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season? Bruce. He was behind the times a decade ago, and hasn't changed much since then. We can't defend, we don't control the ball, and we can't create chances as a team. Wholly reliant on our 'keeper having a good day and maybe, maybe one of our talented attackers to pull something out of thin air.

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans? Yes. Ask if any other Premier League club would want him and you'd get 19 nos. Couple his incompetence with his petulance, his arrogance, his knack for blaming anybody and everybody else for the issues at the club, and you'll see he deserves all the criticism and more. He'd get it from the media as well if he wasn't their mate. 

Do you think you will stay up this season? Maybe. Brighton are below us but are playing some nice stuff, Fulham are below us but are playing some nice stuff. If the thre amigos come back and stay fit for the final 8 or 9 games we might have enough. 

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham? 0-2

Newcastle

Who would you consider the best player is for West Ham? 

I like Antonio, and Soucek, but Lingard has been a revelation for you , 

What do you think West Hams strengths and weaknesses are?

You don't press well. But overall I don't see huge weaknesses.

How do you think Newcastle will get on for the rest of this season?

Either go down, or survive by the skin of our teeth. Not much enjoyment either way. 

What player for Newcastle should opposing teams watch out for?

Normally I'd say Wilson, Almiron or ASM, but they're all out. Willock might be a dangerous player, but Bruce doesn't know how to set up a team, so... I dunno? Carroll if he comes off the bench for more than 30 seconds might injure one of your players?

Are you happy with the return of Andy Carroll?

Not really. Either he's not up to it, or Bruce doesn't trust him. Either way it's a waste of money and a squad place.

How gutted were you when the recent takeover fell through?

I was gutted that Ashley retained ownership. I'd prefer not to be owned by murderers.

What has been Newcastles biggest struggle this season?

Bruce. He was behind the times a decade ago, and hasn't changed much since then. We can't defend, we don't control the ball, and we can't create chances as a team. Wholly reliant on our 'keeper having a good day and maybe, maybe one of our talented attackers to pull something out of thin air.

Does Steve Bruce deserve the criticism he receives from fans?

Yes. Ask if any other Premier League club would want him and you'd get 19 nos. Couple his incompetence with his petulance, his arrogance, his knack for blaming anybody and everybody else for the issues at the club, and you'll see he deserves all the criticism and more. He'd get it from the media as well if he wasn't their mate. 

Do you think you will stay up this season?

Maybe. Brighton are below us but are playing some nice stuff, Fulham are below us but are playing some nice stuff. If the thre amigos come back and stay fit for the final 8 or 9 games we might have enough. 

What are your score predictions for Newcastle v West Ham?

0-2

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