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Flibble.

And to any chimps, for that matter.

You must of said something to upset her for that to happen. "Schweinhund! Hande Hoch! Raus raus!" (copyright Commando comic) I imagine "Rein raus!" was more on his mind at the time.

"Kelly Holmes with a strap-on", allegedly.

The problem is that being female in a societal sense, or even a broadly physical sense, doesn't necessarily tally with being female for the purposes of athletics. It's rare for the two worlds to face off against each other, but that's where we're at and the end result is bound to be awkward whichever way the decision falls.

Badoer acted like a true F1reject. I'm so proud.

God, but it does. Those dinky nipple-sized plasters are your friend, even if they do look mighty odd.

Ah, the guy from Mallrats. </philistine>

Just got back from Berlin - thought we'd take in the first four days rather than the whole thing, as you get the best British medal hopes and the 100m too. Felt a bit sorry for the heptathletes like, halfway through their joint lap of honour and they had to stop and watch Bolt steal their thunder quite comprehensively.

Did him with a strap-on and no lube during their successful navigation of the Pacific Ocean in a banana crate held up by balloon animals. Apparently.

Piss off. If we're thinking of the same person, I agree. And I can't particularly claim to have a rule about younger guys. Still suspect he wouldn't have, mind. Didn't stop you with SMO Hey, sometimes "no" means "give it to me, give it to me hard".

Piss off. If we're thinking of the same person, I agree. And I can't particularly claim to have a rule about younger guys. Still suspect he wouldn't have, mind.

Badoer!

Ouch. Mind, are you sure it wasn't at the Gatwick end? They're dodgy as anything.

"The Way It Is" by Bruce Hornsby and the Range.

I know it's a bit of a stretch, but he could easily become a Srnicek-style folk hero for us - prone to the odd glaring error but generally an all-round top bloke.

What's wrong Parky? When you really feel rock bottom and all is lost.....take pleasure in the simple things in life like a beautiful sunset or a gorgeous full moon and count your blessings. There's always someone worse off than yourself. Alternatively, order in a chinese and watch a top film!! I suppose that's the beauty of living near Hamburg's red light district. The convenience. The mistake he's made is living near the gay red light district. Get yourself down to Olympisches Feuer, get stuck into a gemischtes Souflaki mit Giros and get fucked on ouzo. This works.

The man needs advice, not directions from Trondheim to Trondheim Airport.

You can still get 12s on us to go down at Paddy Power (down from 20/1 a couple of weeks ago).

Aye, I remember this being mentioned over a few pages in the RIP thread and it's a cracking idea, whichever form it ultimately ends up taking.

Bit harsh on himself, the lad.

I've got that on video and was going to put it on DVD at some point. Might not bother now like. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ht6R1kP5xc#t=4m53s Still one of our greatest footballing moments.

The Beeb again. Today's headline reads: House prices 'to recover slowly'. But then the first paragraph reads: "House prices in England will fall this year and next before recovering, the National Housing Federation forecasts." So not so much a slow recovery as... a continued and protracted slump for at least the next 18 months, then? I'd seriously love to know what the BBC's vested interest is in making things seem rosier than they actually are.