GeordieMessiah

Still true?

No. Something along those lines happened alright...but to be fair to Invicta (yes I know! I said "to be fair to Invicta" !!) it was, as I recall, tied up with a certain "Snoopy" stirring it up. All Invicta ever did was ask me as a fellow Edinburgher for advice where to go for a proper greasy spoon breakfast - and then things disintegrated from that point, until Invicta (presumably joking, I hope) suggested he'd just turn up at my pad. Christ though Parky - I think all of this will be exceptionally boring, irrelevant and profoundly uninteresting for the average TT'er. Invicta's no stalker. Is he?

You may laugh, but reliable "sources" at a certain website that may or may not go by the acronym "TOTT" have been hinting at a major happening at NUFC. Imagine if it was Blair who took over at SJP No doubt we'd be arranging "friendlies" with Baghdad FC and Dynamo Tehran...

Just wait for N-O to come back properly then ask on GC over there. The majority there believe that they know everything about all major world/political events. Aye, right! Right now the idea of N-O returning is about as big a myth as global warming, i.e. it may very well happen sometime in the future, but nobody knows quite when or how...

What pattern would that be Parky? Pray tell, for I'm plainly not tuned into Parky FM* tonight. *FM in this instance means "Fucking Mental" rather than "Frequency Modulation"

I'm shite at this Photoshop malarkey, but shit-hot with MS Paint...so here you go:

Vic - do correct me if I'm wrong, but I seem to recall that this flatmate of yours is considerably younger than you, and that you/she also live with her mother? I'd trawl through the N-O archives to prove this point if (1) I could really be arsed (2) N-O was still working - but since neither (1) nor (2) apply at this point in time I'll just go along with the assumption that you're lodging with a couple of dodgy slappers from Gilmerton who tolerate your presence simply because it boosts their household income and allows them to spurt their Housing Benefit on Regal Kingsize and Blue WKD?

I'm sorry but this thread is bordering on homo-erotica. Not sure how you come to that conclusion...perhaps you could provide some sort of comparison from your already vast collection of homo-erotica to validate this point?

Is it perhaps simply the case that tinpot dictators like to stick together - Blair, Kikwete and Shepherd.

Yup. HTT is going to have to pull a rabbit out the hat now to get people back on N-O when (if) it's ever sorted out like! To be honest, I ain't really bothered and that's not me being arrogant or putting a face on, I quite like the cosey feel of a small forum and often wish N.O was smaller and the way I look at it is if anyone who has used something for free and enjoyed the benefits of that, then decide to go missing when things aren't running so smooth, they can fuck off for all I care. I say good riddance. When this place was set up N.O lost a lot of good members, some returned and som still pay a visit but those that never returned for whatever reason, were replaced by new members, like yourself, Parky, Chezgiven et al so if the same does happen again this time round, I'm sure in say 12 months time, there will be new members to fill the void. As long as there is a forum at newcastle-online.com/nufcforum/, it will always be a community, small or large, shit or good. Anyway, expect a PM from me soon with offers of goodies, moderating roles and such That bit in bold...not very friendly is it?! I appreciate you're having a stressful time at the moment, so I'll let you off. This time. And as far as goodies are concerned, I expect nothing less than total ban immunity in future.

Someone should make this thread ancient history now, tbh. Leave it to me, I'll do it.

And then those overpaid "politicians" wonder why the electoral turnout is so low?! What a fucking disgrace - this issue shouldn't even get airtime, let alone parliamentary time.

Yup. HTT is going to have to pull a rabbit out the hat now to get people back on N-O when (if) it's ever sorted out like!

Have to admit, the longer that place stays in its present fucked condition, the more likely that will actually be. EDIT: And just to make it clear - I think that would be a shame tbh.

Aye...that confirms the gay rumours.

All the best chefs are fat fuckers though... I'll leave you to make your own calculations about how good a chef I am then!

I read that and I immediately thought: Patrick Kluivert.

That one is fairly ridiculous like. Quite, remarkable achievement by the cameraman to have moved at all before it was in the back of the net. What was the name of that sports commentator that Spitting Image used to do who always said 'Quite remarkable!' ? David Coleman

The lengths marketing companies will go to today just to get people's personal details so they can SPAM them to fuck! By phoe and text as well as email. Sheer brilliance! Inspired!!!!

Says the bloke who had to return to full time education having lost his job. he casts ..... 10mins ...... he hooks ......... Now responding to something someone says is a bite. Tremendous stuff! here fishy fishy fishy What medication are you on?

Assumed we were keeping it Newcastle like, but since you've raised the spectre of a Smoggie, I suppose I could just add that I bumped into (and I mean I really did BUMP into) Mark Viduka and his wife in Leeds a couple of years ago. He looked quite frightened, like he thought I was going to mug him or something. I suppose it was dark, outside the multi-storey car park in New York Street, just behind the market and it would be a prime place for a good mugging. Damn, another opportunity missed. I bet he fuckin shat himself at the sight of you Aye. Exactly the same expression as Gemmill had on when I walked into the bar. Absolutely shitting bricks. What with you sweating like a fucked fridge it was a right old sight for sore eyes. What shocked me about you was your surprising resemblance (now you've shaved off those ridiculous dreads!) to a certain Mr. Cannavaro. Seriously. Oh, and fuck off with the sweaty Jock comments.

Aye. And why not? You just gotta look at that cheeky wee face and think "Awwwwwwwww!"

Assumed we were keeping it Newcastle like, but since you've raised the spectre of a Smoggie, I suppose I could just add that I bumped into (and I mean I really did BUMP into) Mark Viduka and his wife in Leeds a couple of years ago. He looked quite frightened, like he thought I was going to mug him or something. I suppose it was dark, outside the multi-storey car park in New York Street, just behind the market and it would be a prime place for a good mugging. Damn, another opportunity missed. I bet he fuckin shat himself at the sight of you Aye. Exactly the same expression as Gemmill had on when I walked into the bar. Absolutely shitting bricks.

Assumed we were keeping it Newcastle like, but since you've raised the spectre of a Smoggie, I suppose I could just add that I bumped into (and I mean I really did BUMP into) Mark Viduka and his wife in Leeds a couple of years ago. He looked quite frightened, like he thought I was going to mug him or something. I suppose it was dark, outside the multi-storey car park in New York Street, just behind the market and it would be a prime place for a good mugging. Damn, another opportunity missed.