Dr Kenneth Noisewater

The rivalry up here is pretty bad and the chances are someone will say/do something but the rest of the support will look at you as an attention seeking so and so... If you whip it out in the ground chances are you'll be escorted from the ground as was the Liverpool fan who did similar last season. Ignore him mate, he's not from Gateshead, he's from Northern Ireland. What's the atmos like at friendlies? I'm going, but I'm going with a Rangers mate so I'll be in with your lot. Should I openly celebrate any of our many goals?

When you look at how ugly the people in the 80s were I'd agree. I bet she had a fuckin proper hairy minge though. Better than who Dennis ended up shaggin in Ally Frasers villa though. She had teeth like Borussia Dortmunds strip when they won the Champions League.

Not only has society and culture changed but technology has too. When I was a kid it was kick-about at play-time, football at dinnertime then after school out with a ball to the park til it was dark or you got shouted back in. I rarely see kids kicking a ball about or practising skills these days, they'd rather be in their bedrooms playing FIFA I suppose. I guess that is the same in other countries too though?

Best footballer I've seen play for us (probably the best I'll ever see play for us) is Beardsley, no question about it. My favourite period of time comes from that incredibly exciting spell when Andy Cole seemed to get the first goal almost every game. My cult-hero, under the radar award would go to Clarence Acuna who I thought was a smashing little player at what he did, under-rated and criminally under-used.

Got to admire Emile Heskey, has a disastrous world cup, comes home, sticks a frock on and wins the womens title at Wimbledon.

We had a Paraguayan during Bobby's time didn't we? Diego Gavilan. That's good enough for me (well, that and Larissa Riquelme) Howay Paraguay!

Like it.

Maradona not blubbing. Slightly disappointing.

Is the story about KK thinking Schweistiger was coming here when he agreed to the Milner sale true or just speculation & rumour?

Why don't you get the bairn an Asda voucher for his christening present?

That's fucking ridiculous like.

or Newcastle. when was the last time we had a pen shootout? When we fucked up the Champions League qualifier? Or have we had any in the uefa / intertoto / domestic cups since then?

Big Ron dancing round his sitting room.

or Newcastle.

If Ghana win, I'm switching off as soon as the last pen hits the back of the net. I can't watch Desailly jumping up & down and spouting incoherent bollocks again.

Fucking hell!

FYP

What are the odds he scores past us on the first day?

So, you, ewerk and Kevin are all from the North, and Barney is from the south, right?

Generally, yes. For a long time Windsor Park wasn't a place to go if you were a Catholic, it's not so bad now but it's a bit late to be changing allegiances. Is that why Neil lennon got grief for playing for N.Ireland?

Do Northern Irish protestants support the Northern Irish international side and Northern Irish Catholics support the Republic side?

This buddy-buddy act isn't working for me. I bet Hamilton won't be as matey if he gets a couple of DNF's while Button gets some good finishes.

I typed "Would all guests contact the official Toontastic cultural ambassador, Stevie, immediately" into Google Translator. I then got it to translate back from the Arabic to English and it came up with this: "That all official contacts with the guests, Ambassador cultural Toontastic, Stevie Wonder, on the spot."

ماذا تريد مع زوجتيه؟