Ayatollah Hermione

Not surprised the Mackems think they invented flags considering they’ve been go good at waving white ones in nearly all their seasons in the top flight

Sorry Now I’m finished

It was me and, considering how poor we were in the first half, how depleted we are with injuries and the week or so we’ve had, at the high levels we’ve given, it’s a good result

Think it’s only right that Dortmund are replaced with Boro in our Champions League group. Only then can we get a clear answer to who the best team in Europe is

Ward-Prowse has turned West Ham around massively, really second only to Maddison’s impact at Spurs so he’s picked Henderson and gave a sympathy pick for West Ham to Bowen instead

I’ll take a point here and a win against Palace at home, please

The only downside to this is that I have Status Fucking Quo stuck in my head

Mind, we’ve arrived now. I thought we may grow into the CL after a teething period but nah, straight in, balls deep in the second game, fuck the lot of them. Eddie Howe, you son of a bitch

Sounds like you’ve drowned it. Shameful

Another lol at us, of all people, being Luis Enrique’s bogey team. We’ve waited 23 years to dick him over again

Also, whoever got Mbappe’s shirt should hold a ceremonial burning of it at the Monument. Let them kna

Lascelles is looking like the Lascelles of the Rafa years except he can sort of control a ball first time now. Mind, Schar is going to be a fucking nightmare to replace he’s the Alpine Albert

Another home game after that is fucking ideal. It’ll be jumping again after that

Edward Howe, what are you building here?

Imagine if Joelinton had played and we could have brought Wilson on for a tired Isak

Definitely crying at full time here

COMMENCE THE SHITHOUSERY

Fuck me, what a half that was

Terry Butcher him and keep him on. Concussions don’t count tonight

Jenas not missing another chance to rewrite his personal history up here

I remember when he, after being banned or suspended or whatever, from here, replied to one of my mates tweets with a massive thread about people on Toontastic and saying Ant had put a virus in his computer. My mate was completely fucking baffled

Here’s a spoiler for yours: it’ll be a comfortable 2-0 win. Get stuck into our game

That Onana is the worst keeper I’ve ever seen a “top club” buy. Without a doubt. Maybe if he wasn’t coached by a baldy fraud, he might be slightly better but he’s a walking disaster in a way that Maguire never was. At least you could recover from some of Maguire’s mistakes; every time this knacker drops a bollock, it’s a goal

Looks like a crate of MSG

There we go, just typical incompetence not some bizarre match fixing scandal like some people wanted Now if they can please release audio from every other decision that warranted an apology in the interest of fairness