Kitman

On "champagne" for the laydeez?

We have the engine room of a 957cc Ford Fiesta. OK, maybe not as powerful as that.

The one on the right looks lik e a scary mo-fo

Yes, she's had her Rocky Horror theme wedding and then trousered all his cash. So long, sucker

Oh yes it FKN does. Avoiding relegation is equivalent to winning the champions league this season. Do you want to spen next August looking forward to such horrors as; Swansea City Bristol City Queens Park Rangers Burnley Ipswich Town Sheffield Wednesday Crystal Palace Coventry City Blackpool Derby County Plymouth Argyle Nottingham Forest Doncaster Rovers Norwich City Barnsley You've missed my point. Never mind, I agree with you re the above. Yay, relegation scrap!

Doctors are concerned about increased cases of Llambias amongst teenagers, caused by unprotected anal sex.

I wonder if the argument was over how fucking tacky the wedding was?

Our season's beyond saving tbh. Avoiding relegation doesn't count as having any sort of season really.

The Silence of the Llambias?

You do have to wonder who some of these people are, and how they can tolerate what's happening. They seem more interested in the club's balance sheet than the first team or the direction of the club. I hope some of them aren't genuine.

O'Leary has to be a real worry

This is what annoys the hell out of me. They congratulate themselves about their "5 year plan" but what planning do they really do? What about the most important job in the club, any "planning" going on here at all? No? Seriously, you have a manager with a poor track record, poor health and who's refusing to sign a new contract, and you're not even thinking about who might replace him? Putting out feelers, seeing who might be suitable etc? No, let's wait till it becomes an absolute bloody crisis then see who might be interested, preferably shortly before the season kicks off. It's seriously cack, we should have had some idea of contingency already and now in the light of his health problems we should be planning to replace Kinnear sooner rather than later and no later than the end of the season. Instead we'd rather put the car in neutral and let it freewheel down the hill, taking our hands off the wheel at the same time and shouting "Wheeeeeeeeee!" Incidentally it's obvious to me that this "plan" is the review that Chris Mort did originally with a view to stabilising the club financially based on very limited spending. It's now sitting in a drawer until the next transfer window when Llambias can get it out again like that travel agent character from Little Britain: NUFC Manager "Please can I have 20m to spend on the players we need for the squad" Llambias "Let's see what The Plan says, shall we?" *Takes Mort's report out of drawer, runs finger down pages * "Let's see now. 2009, 2009,2009. Here we are! Oh dear. Plan says No." * Manager exits *

He might as well leave. Some players are just unlucky. Or un-Luque.

Is that the biggest pair of bollocks ever??? You're forgetting Hall & Shepherd * runs before Leazes Mag gets here *

Could've had a shave knowing they were taking a piccy. Honestly, bit of effort goes a long way

Big bones?

Seems unlikely. It would involve coming out of hiding for a start.

I doubt we'll have to worry about this list next year, the way things are going atm

I expect not many top managers would fancy being Dennis Wise's bitch.......

It's all part of the plan, bay-bee!

"Smell the farce. Touching cloth"

"If you tell a big enough lie and tell it frequently enough, it will be believed." Adolph Hitler

A step in the right direction. The players lack spirituality At least he'll have an adequate explanation as to why most of them are retards. What would he make of Joey Barton's karma? I honestly think he's a good coach, but maybe the religious nutter side of him would just give the press another stick to beat us with. Can you imagine wor Joey with Eileen Drewery? Lay on those healing hands, Eileen

Aye in the 80s, even Souness was winning things back then. Its 2009 ffs.... The space/time continuum is a myth promulgated by the secret intelligence services to enslave ordinary members of the public * * in Herr Parky's head, crouched in his German fallout shelter lined with baco-foil You know it's right. The idea's been very liberating, I haven't turned up to work in weeks. My attempts to prove that the call of nature is also a lie have not been entirely successful though

Aye in the 80s, even Souness was winning things back then. Its 2009 ffs.... The space/time continuum is a myth promulgated by the secret intelligence services to enslave ordinary members of the public * * in Herr Parky's head, crouched in his German fallout shelter lined with baco-foil