Brock Manson

The Pope asking for a rubber? - thats your place in hell confirmed 61745[/snapback] Fine then an eraser but it was a class joke and you know it.

The Pope is bored and so is filling out the crossword in the newspaper. He turns to his advisors for help: "four letters, strictly female, last 3 letters: u, n, t." "Aunt" they say. "Ah yes" smiles the pope. "Do you have a rubber?"

Hockey gloves please

Some things that spring to mind: 1) The amount of turks we're being linked with, reminds me of the crusades. 2) Maybe FF asked Souey if he could nip down to the shops and buy some turps and Souey misheard? 3) Where's the money coming from?

Whoah! That's weird!

Can someone get me Heidi Klum for xmas?

DS as good as the SNES? Before my time? The SNES was an absolutely brilliant console and I still dig it out now and again for a session of Zelda or Mario Allstars. I was playing polarium and wario ware on a mate's DS during a car ride but wasn't particularly moved so that I had to rush out and get one. And if I'm being honest i'm not the sort of person who buys a console just for the one game since I don't have that sort of money available when I need it for other, more important things. It's not a lazy response to say it's a gimmick because it is a gimmick. Wi-fi is hardly an innovation as it had been originally used before the DS was released, and most games don't make much use of the stylus or extra screen, some not at all. Don't get me wrong I'm a Nintendo fan but just because the DS houses the odd class game (which you'd come to expect from Nintendo) doesn't make me want to buy it when I'm perfectly happy with my Gamecube (Fire Emblem is coming out ).

Deery me

Quoted for truth. Personally, I'd carry Joaquin from Seville if he were to sign for us ! 61119[/snapback] Agreed. Sign him first, then worry about where the money has came from after. 61129[/snapback] That's pretty much what happened to Leeds though isn't it?

You don't need two screens for a game to be good. There's your gimmick.

Here's a not so intellectual joke: Wife: I wish I had bigger tits Husband: Try rubbing a piece of toilet paper between them. Wife: Do you really reckon that would work? Husband: It did for your arse.

This page could've been devoted to chinese food and you spoiled it with mexican. About as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit tbh.

Who? Didn't we sign a certain english chap to replace Big Al? And a spaniard who we have trouble discriminating upon which is his best position?

A few things spring to mind. 1) What the fuck did we sign Solano for? 2) Aren't we forgetting a player called James Milner? 3) Where the hell will we get the transfer fee to bring him to SJP when we've just spent 50 million? 4) We don't have a hope in signing him no matter how much money the chairman conjures up.

A guest speaker at the woman's institute had difficulty in remembering names. He had particular trouble with the president's name: Mrs Franny. "Just remember, it's 'fanny' with an 'R'." Said one of the helpful ladies. At the end of the speech the speaker said: "I want to thank you ladies for your time and especially your President..... Mrs Crunt!"

Looks like a mouldy chicken

People who fork out shitloads of money for the DS when most of it's games are just gimmicks scare me tbh. That goes for handhelds in general.

Fear Factory - Scumgrief This song is class!

Fear Factory - Scapegoat

A Chinese takeaway or the Chinese takeaway? 60831[/snapback] They even gave me a money-off voucher this time

Alreet I just got back in from Reading (went to do some xmas shopping which was largely unsuccessful). Had a chinese takeaway for lunch so I'm sitting down with some prawn crackers which I'm dipping in sweet&sour sauce. Yummy. Anyway was in virgin because the prices in HMV were fucking ridiculous. £18 for a Fear Factory album which I got in Virgin for £10.99. (Soul Of A New Machine and Fear Is The Mind Killer). Anyway this album I picked out for meself had a scratch on the front so I says "hi do you have one of these that isn't scratched?" so the girl rpelies "yeah sure". Then poor lass changes the case but now it wont shut! So then we try to put the CD's and sleeve back int he original scratched case but it wont shut either! So for about 10 minutes she tried different cases, in the end another woman got a 2CD case and it closed no problem. I wasn't pissed off because I was the one who asked for the other case

Well that's good because she's hot and it means she finally has the chance to get with the Brockmeister. (Danger danger John Soltage ) 60517[/snapback] From the neck down yeah. Her face looks like a bloke tbh 60518[/snapback] Says the bloke with the Aguilera obsession

Well that's good because she's hot and it means she finally has the chance to get with the Brockmeister. (Danger danger John Soltage )

Who? More breaking news: I've been called an 'evil chavvy bastard'

I'm Shola and you're all wankers tbh.