PaddockLad

Bert is a bastard…

So sexy that your weekend consists of at least two self flagellating aerobic workouts in the middle of the fucking night…each to their own but if you’re not running to an early morning neighbourhood liaison all that sexiness is being wasted as far as I can make out

The return of Gundogan has been a disaster…

Spurs twatting Man City 0-4 after letting Ipswich beat them at home is possibly the most spursy thing in history

He’s a fuckin legend man

Navy blue grandad tonight, I know Gemmill wouldn’t be able to sleep without knowing ☺️

I’m going to the 21st birthday party of two lads who’s dads are mates of mine. One of the birthday boys was with us in Newcastle earlier this year…so there’s going to be a huge team of young shavers all flat out on the piss waiting for the middle aged to try to keep up with them in the drinking stakes. Stand by for reports of the severity of hangover and any behaviour that may incur feelings of regret ☺️😬🍺

Hasn’t Rents got a medical degree though? Fuckin rocky ground here Gemma ps you also got Covid after years of you suggesting in most self aggrandising manner possible that you were somehow superhumanly immune so you have got history with bogus health claims 🤷🏻‍♂️

So do we think BlackRock are providing investment to private companies for UK projects that will create “growth TM” or are they just another bunch of loan sharks trying to dig a nations finances even deeper on to their hook?

So after my venture into high brow Latin mysticism I have returned to more familiar ground; the ex footballer’s autobiography… so I’ll open it to the floor…. how much “literary time” does the author give to his two seasons playing for a certain football club in the North East of England?

Noncechops Gaetz withdraws as nominee for AG. Senate comitttee must’ve been about to stab him to death. He instantly resigned from the HOR when it was announced too

I’ll let others decide how accurate all this is. One thing is for sure we wouldn’t be able to achieve it ourselves if we’re outside the EU (despite what he says) or via either of our two main political parties

“Now I ain’t saying he’s a badge kisser But he ain’t messing and it always triggers “

Ginger farmers from the Cotswolds ✅

I listened to all that and I like JOB but just telling that cunt to sell his land for solar panels so he can pay his IHT partly proves the point some farmers are legitimately making and also proves JOB doesn’t understand farmers or the countryside. I remember shepherds distraught at the thought of their flocks being slaughtered for nothing during foot and mouth. I still don’t properly understand that but the depth of feeling was profound. Yes there are ocean going fuckin wankers leading and contributing to this debate but I remember it coming down to a very stark question at the time of F & M; what is the countryside actually for, and who should control its future?.. that’s what this is essentially about. JOB can go fuck himself with that glib bullshit reply. PS around 51% of farmers voted to leave the EU . It was stronger in some areas than others, in Scotland & NI a majority of farmers voted remain. The perception is very different but that’s life I suppose…

I can’t put that on my own social media. My friends in the most intensively farmed area of Scotland where I grew up would very likely stab me to death in the village pub next time I’m up

“Hello police? I’d like to report a murder. Victoria Derbyshire had just stabbed Jeremy Clarkson to death in central London” ☺️

I go on call on Monday nights, we go right through to 8am the following Monday morning… which for me was this morning….so I’ve drank more tonight than I should have for a Monday after 7 days abstinence

Not Guinness tonight just bitter for ewerk

Between the ages of 18-22 Weller wrote some lyrics which, for his age, class and education, are fucking astounding 👍

🖕🏼

Scotland winning 0-1 in Warsaw at the break, Doak with another assist for McGinn, hit the post and bar too. That’s not to say Poland haven’t threatened but 42 year old geriatric jambo (ie the same clan as @Toonpack) Craig Gordon has been great…. and Lewandovski isn’t playing, obvs