PaddockLad

Luakaku wants to play somewhere next season..... http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2013/jun/04/jose-mourinho-chelsea-romelu-lukaku

Thats the coolest infant in Western Europe

Good point about HBA being out, he drifted into the right hand channel a lot. But it pisses me off somewhat when people use the "winger" term to beat Pardew over the head with. Its inaccurate to say the least iyam. Same with Shola. We didnt play 442 post Janaury to any great extent, real width was supposed to be provided by Debuchy and Santon, pushing up to support the 3 in behind Cisse.

See I cant see that....maybe I've missed something but I don't see anything defensive about his game. Perfectly willing to be proved wrong but on the evidence of last season I just dont see it. He's principally a runner as a a player, he needs space to move into to exploit his pace, and he's not going to get that as often if he's doing an overwhelmingly defensive job as you're suggesting. I think our lapse into long ball mode often in the second half of games last season made in a marginal figure late on in games. Our other tactic of trying to catch sides on the break is what he was there to do, and it worked to the extent that he almost always got past his immediate marker...as you say its what happened after that is where it went wrong. Not enough support for his runs.

Ok its happened again and I'm frankly puzzled...someone has said in the transfer thread that Pardew picked Sissoko mostly on the wing last season. And its also said quite a lot that he she play further back, in beside another central midfielder. I don't think theres a lot of evidence for the former and I take it that the latter comes from his time at Toulouse?...for me, he looks like a classic inside forward, which is what young uns would call an attacking midfielder these days and I think that's where Pardew picked him for most of the games last season. Can someone please explain why its thought he was picked on the wing?...heres something to have a look at, you might want to turn the sound down though

Even those who have made 4 payments on it already?....I'm renewing it because of that, and also because I'm a Newcastle United supporter, for good or bad. I suppose there a quite a few reasons for renewing...those that just want to watch live top divison football, some may just do it out of habit, some willing to give Ashley/Pardew another chance after the good season when we finished 5th, those who can't help themselves, some who think it's actually good value price wise, if not quality wise. Ashley has surprised us before with his signings, and there was a theory not too long ago we did business very well; good players, bought relatively cheaply, without long drawn out "auctions" etc. Theres no reason to expect that we're not doing that sort thing this summer. Thing is, Pardew has got to do better from the start, or he's toast. After the last 3 home games of last season he needs a very solid beginning to the season...if the fixture list is unkind, that could be it for him and we could be looking for a new manager in the Autumn..

because its a free country? I dunno, are all comics control freaks or something?...

there you go again You're right, I dont understand a lot of things about it. I dont understand why you simultanelously hold the rights to full attention, good standards of behaviour and respect from the audience then piss your pants when you dont get it or someone claims that one of your gags is offensive,and where the only defence you feel justified in giving id "its only a joke, dont get too upset". You're right. I dont understand that.

Why do you think I googled it?... its from his first book...reasons to be cheerful... As for the rest, it does seem utterly pointless paying money and then not listening. But if s/he is good theres more chance of holding an audience's attention. If you get a lot of people talking among themselves at a gig, theres a problem. If its only a couple, for fucks sakes, man up. Ignore them, its their loss, dont get a thug to hoy them out.

did you issue them with your list beforehand?

Fish/KCG, in one of Mark Steele's books he describes performing "in front of 200 pissed Millwall fans at the Tunnel Club". He wasnt on 2k a weekend in the mid 80s either. Whats changed? at that level I'm talking, large-ish club gigs... what would the main differences be between then and now?...are aggresive audiences still out there, outside of the hen/stag circuit?...are there comics willing play to them for buttons as Steele wiouldve got, just to pay the rent? what would the security have been like for that gig?...and how do you impress 200 Millwall fans by being a member of the Socialist Workers Party ffs ?...and you're telling me that your evening turns all "frightful daahling" because theres a few daft comments from a drunk trying to be smart?!

How can you expect to control it though?...apart from getting intimidating goons to do it for you...

I haven't said I dont like it either, I like and admire anyone who shows talent. Making a list of "do's" and "don'ts" is sort of going a long way towards saying I might have a point though, isnt it?... just get over yourselves a bit

This is where it all falls down...being over precious about your "craft", and then not being able to take stick yourselves, or getting a nark on when someone pulls you up for being offensive. You lot in comedy make these rules yourself and think you're protected by them, just because you say its that way? You all live in the real world normally, you can see that things work differently outside of your ivory towers, can't you?... I dont heckle or catcall, or get that offended by anything really. But I dont really complain when others do it either. Dont see why those in the "trade" should either. I can see how a lot of work can be ruined by drunks, but you're working in an alcohol saturated enviroment which you have no real control over, unless you are very good. Putting your head above the parapet to be shot at and then coming over all a bit harry handbag when the going gets tough is fuckin laughable man.

BIG changes at the stadio del shiteio... http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2013/may/31/paolo-di-canio-sunderland-overhaul

Thats the one, makes sense. The bloke who died on his arse had just come out the closet, poor fucker

I hope the acts I saw in Hyena that night weren't on a couple of grand each; if they were they just prove my point that theres far too much cash swimming around in stand up and people are being paid for being mediocre at best I see what you're saying and on a basic level it makes sense. But I saw a bill in Soho a few years back where the compare was Rufus Hound, Milton Jones, some other gadge off the box who's name escape's me and some other bloke plainly with huge personal issues and using his spot as some sort of public therapy session. 3 of them were funny, and 3 of them were pretty soon on tv. The last guy wasn't and got a bit of good natured stick from those still listening after 5 minutes. He pretty much died. don't tell me he was getting top dollar too, or that we had to show him some respect for just "giving it a go"?

So you're not allowed to stump up on a whim then,as part of an evening out, and inadvertantly make a judgement?...look, I'm aware that you may be invloved somehow in this game but you're basically saying that comedy clubs are only for proper afficionado's such as yourself who enjoy a sweet sherry or two of an evening, and people turning up on spec are only welcome if theyre pretty sober too...not that these lads who were kicked out of the Hyena were pissed, far from it, they were just easier to pick on than a stag do in order to make a point which was, as you've pointed out, irrelevent in a place that lets parties like that in. Thats not always been the case. The shite died in the clubs and went back down the pits in the old days, the rest became Les Dawson or similar. Natural selection as it were. Now its a cash fest, every jumped up prick wants in, thus we've to respect utter shit...or else. Tell me am wrong, am perfectly willing to listen, but you've not really made a case for us all to fall into line with how lot of clubs want their punters to behave. If you want paying for something, at least be half decent at it. And if you've got alcohol involved, as it always has been in this game, dont try it if you're lacking a bit of bottle.

Well no, but the comparison is a poor one iyam. Especially when the vast majority of cinema's in this country dont serve alcohol. The Stand started in Glasgow or Edinburgh didnt it?.... according to Frankie Boyle's book it did. Did it have this sort of policy in those days, in those cities, before large amounts of money were to be made from this game? I fuckin doubt it So what we're looking at isnt considerate and respectful behaviour towards others, its making sure shite acts dont get intimidated by a rowdy crowd, thus ensuring the production line keeps churning out mediocrity.

Think Baddiel and Newman selling out Wembley 20 years ago has a lot to answer for tbh. Too many in the game now, not only talent, but agents,clubs etc etc all looking to maximise their chances of making a shed load of money. Fair enough, that's the way things have gone, but when that comes down to picking on a couple of lads out for a pint on a Friday night and making them look and no doubt feel like criminals then its gone too far.

Would the clubs survive without them though?...££££££££

That night I was in there were two or three stag/hen do's in who naturally a lot more rowdy than two lads sat there having a pint and a bit of crack between themselves. Seemed like bullying to me. The act they were ignoring was a fairly unintelligible (even to me, brought up north of the border myself) Glaswegian who was ok, but lacked a bit of confidence. Think he tried to make up for it by taking a bit of "Dutch courage" beforehand too, which really didn't help. Maybe I was just in on a bad night, but it wasn't a good advert for the place.

Wouldn't say I'm a regular at any comedy club, but I've been to enough over the years in different parts of the country to know that what went on was heavy handed to say the least. Seems mostly driven by the huge number of comics out there trying to make it and punters are being forced by the clubs to pay attention to them regardless of how good they are. If theyre not good enough to hold a crowd well that's a shame, and obviously its in the clubs' interest to keep the acts motivated and happy so they stick with it, ensuring the clubs keep earning too. A case of "jobs for the boys/girls"?

Went to Hyena's a while ago and they kicked a couple of punters out for talking among themselves. Seems not paying the acts enough attention gets you trated like a child. Won't be back.

Think we might just go up late, have a few around Camden and mooch on up in our own time...saw Dizzee Rascal at Glastonbury a few years back, he was ok actually, good for a festival, but for a Roses gig?....not for me. The others I've heard of, and that's about it.