Monkeys Fist

I stopped going when Hughton got sacked. In truth, I'd been going less anyway due to annoying shit like kids and family ( ), but Hughton's sacking was my line in the sand. Thing is, it's an entirely personal decision, everyone has their own limits

Hope it wasn't too bad mate Going to ask Mrs. F. for an unfuck tonight though

He had too many beer shits in his Hilton scratcher. " Clean that up, Luv"

Just noticed my pet crow has got man boobs. Hur hur hur

Taking bets on the first opposition player booked for a "Professional Wedgie"?

It's better than "Titbeast" which I've heard used by some rabble.

Kinnear comes steaming in to Wales. " I've been to betfairpissedsillygooglecock you know. "

The tattooed amputee attempting press ups got a wry smile from me. " nnnnngh -if I had arms I could lower myself...... BASTAAAAAARD!!"

Party wings. They're usually dull

8's is a 'polite' code we use when doing office blocks. It means there is a rather plain lady with magnificent breasts in view - as in 8 tits on a pig

First horsemeat , now moobs. Cripes, by jingo!

You'll be cracking the pan later.

You booked your hysterectomy yet CT?

Rag week, innit?

DoF Director of Flappy Bird

Fuck me

My knees.

Pissed away by lunchtime.

Panto season isn't.

Just out of interest, how long was left on his contract when his heart exploded last time with us?