Monkeys Fist

And gets himself added to the list by the plod in the background.

@Renton, Brannigans Beef and Mustard were fucking nuclear when they first came out- cleared the sinus in one crisp. Have they toned them down?

The sweats came after 10 minutes of…

Tudor Pickled Onion wasn’t so much a crisp as a rite of passage for your mouth.

That’s just an entire spud on a stick, isn’t it?

A crisp theme park, no less. Can you picture it playing out up here? “ What do you fancy doing this weekend pet?” ” Can we visit Stottie Towers ?” ” Divorce papers are in the post, love”

Looks like Renton’s seagull went there on holiday.

Tayto fucking Castle.

I’ve just realised that every person you see here will be clipped on to a single fixed rope. Taking an educated guess, I’d say the biggest stretch between anchors is going to be about 40-50m, which means you’ll have roughly the same number of people on that section of rope. Given how crammed together they are, if just one of them slipped and weighted the rope, you’d be looking at the rest getting pulled off the ridge, with the high likelihood of the rope going “ping” and snapping. Fucking madness.

How radge is your decking that you need to hold it down, like? Did you buy it from Deano?

The closest our erstwhile metector will ever get to Everest is digging up Ted Moult for his rings.

“Labour isn’t working”

Fucking hell. The levels of idiocy involved in this are quite staggering.

Where’s that?

It’s very good.

Spiegelei mit bratkartoffeln. Die katz ist in dem kleiderschrank. Mutter ist ein schmutziger Töpfchenmund.

Just make sausage and chips then throw the sausage in the bin. Sorted.

Mmmm, Marmite on toast…

I have no idea who those two renta-cunts modelling the shirts are, but they’re the footballing version of basic bitches.

And yet, I’ve come in to contact with way too many Mackems than is healthy, and not a single one of the skanky, rancid, sister-loving, paedo-friendly, messiah fixated, sister-loving ( did I say that already?They really like their sisters), seat shitting, free ticket, dirty fucking bastards would understand the concept of a “friendly pint”. Fucking manky cunts.

What’s are you chaps’ gut feeling about how this entire shitshow will play out? 1) Crash out -no deal 2) 2nd referendum 3) Let’s call the whole thing off 4) Civil War. 5) None of the above

Worth noting it’s only the UK operations of his business that’s gone fucky. Wonder why that could be?

Uncal Mick’s Fencing Crew.

The fat-tongued pukka boy’s restaurants have gone tits up https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-48352026 Boosh.