What's Currently Wrong With You

[Dr Gloom 24672]

and some high grade bong for Gemmill 

[Monkeys Fist 47207]

2 hours ago, wykikitoon said:

You're too posh. But maybe you could educate us 😄 

 

39 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said:

I’ll bring a packet of attitude adjusters 👌

Is that the posh word for fists? 

[Gemmill 53685]

1 hour ago, Dr Gloom said:

and some high grade bong for Gemmill 

 

I'm on medical grade baby. You haven't had a conversation with a doctor until you've heard them say the words "green kush" with a straight face.

 

[wykikitoon 24473]

I assume it's in pill form like?

[Gemmill 53685]

Nah it's the plant just like normal. It's illegal to smoke it but you use a vape. 

[strawb 4932]

Not me but my mams best friends daughter who I grew up with has been given a year to live, only 45 with two young daughters.

 

Im here worrying about being a bit over weight, not sure it’s worth the stress tbh. Might get fat as fuck and happy. 

 

[RobinRobin 13249]

11 hours ago, Dr Gloom said:

I’ll bring a packet of attitude adjusters 👌

Better bring some Pimms as well. 

[Kid Dynamite 8141]

Had a lump in my tit. Had to go to the breast cancer clinic to get it checked out. Thankfully it was nothing and the doctor reckoned it's probably off eating too much fake protein in shakes/bars/yoghurts.
 

The experience at the clinic was probably the most emasculating of my life though. A young lass had to squeeze my pec (moob) into a breast scanner, then I had to sit in a waiting room full of elderly women for 2 hours staring at a wall and getting side eyed, before the doctor asked to examine my balls in case I had a lump there too.
 

Drove myself home after and didn't even put the radio on. Just sat in silence feeling violated. FML

[Andrew 5805]

9 minutes ago, Kid Dynamite said:

Had a lump in my tit. Had to go to the breast cancer clinic to get it checked out. Thankfully it was nothing and the doctor reckoned it's probably off eating too much fake protein in shakes/bars/yoghurts.
 

The experience at the clinic was probably the most emasculating of my life though. A young lass had to squeeze my pec (moob) into a breast scanner, then I had to sit in a waiting room full of elderly women for 2 hours staring at a wall and getting side eyed, before the doctor asked to examine my balls in case I had a lump there too.
 

Drove myself home after and didn't even put the radio on. Just sat in silence feeling violated. FML

Glad you're alright but what was he basing that on? Never heard any suggestion that benign lumps could be formed from having too many protein shakes before.

[Kid Dynamite 8141]

1 hour ago, Andrew said:

Glad you're alright but what was he basing that on? Never heard any suggestion that benign lumps could be formed from having too many protein shakes before.

They contain Oestrogen which grows breast tissue in men apparently  (something to do with how much cows milk is in iirc)

[Dr Gloom 24672]

3 hours ago, Kid Dynamite said:

Had a lump in my tit. Had to go to the breast cancer clinic to get it checked out. Thankfully it was nothing and the doctor reckoned it's probably off eating too much fake protein in shakes/bars/yoghurts.
 

The experience at the clinic was probably the most emasculating of my life though. A young lass had to squeeze my pec (moob) into a breast scanner, then I had to sit in a waiting room full of elderly women for 2 hours staring at a wall and getting side eyed, before the doctor asked to examine my balls in case I had a lump there too.
 

Drove myself home after and didn't even put the radio on. Just sat in silence feeling violated. FML

I had a similar experience at the doctor’s recently. I’ll spare you the details but degrading is an understatement. I’ll just say I was being examined in what can only be described as a vulnerable pose. Thankfully all clear here too  

[Howmanheyman 38889]

Just now, Dr Gloom said:

I had a similar experience at the doctor’s recently. I’ll spare you the details but degrading is an understatement. I’ll just say I was being examined in what can only be described as a vulnerable pose. Thankfully all clear here too  

 

I've had a few experiences like that, I'll just embrace it if it ever happens again, maybe stick a daffodil up my arse to soften the scenery?

[Gemmill 53685]

When I had the finger up the arse just before Christmas, he kept pressing really hard and going "and that doesn't hurt?"...... "errr no, I mean it's not nice but it doesn't hurt"  which he just seemed to take as a personal insult and tried again "..... That's not hurting?!" 

 

As close to being finger fucked as I've ever been. 

[Renton 25004]

1 hour ago, Dr Gloom said:

I had a similar experience at the doctor’s recently. I’ll spare you the details but degrading is an understatement. I’ll just say I was being examined in what can only be described as a vulnerable pose. Thankfully all clear here too  

[wykikitoon 24473]

Prior to me having the camera up the japs eye they did an ultrasound scan on my balls. The nurse said she would step out whilst I undressed. Then I laid there with my cock out 🤣

[Monkeys Fist 47207]

1 hour ago, Renton said:

It will if he gets all three hands up there! 

[Gemmill 53685]

10 hours ago, Kid Dynamite said:

Had a lump in my tit. Had to go to the breast cancer clinic to get it checked out. Thankfully it was nothing and the doctor reckoned it's probably off eating too much fake protein in shakes/bars/yoghurts.
 

The experience at the clinic was probably the most emasculating of my life though. A young lass had to squeeze my pec (moob) into a breast scanner, then I had to sit in a waiting room full of elderly women for 2 hours staring at a wall and getting side eyed, before the doctor asked to examine my balls in case I had a lump there too.
 

Drove myself home after and didn't even put the radio on. Just sat in silence feeling violated. FML

 

Pleased to hear you're alright btw. The one stop shop stuff they do for bollock and tit scans these days are a brilliant change though, where you leave knowing the story. Instead of having to go home wondering what the lad on the ultrasound saw and wait for a letter, like it used to be. 

 

I reckon they just got one look at the captain of team handsome and thought fuck it I'm getting a look at his balls too. 

[Dr Gloom 24672]

On 28/06/2025 at 13:45, wykikitoon said:

Prior to me having the camera up the japs eye they did an ultrasound scan on my balls. The nurse said she would step out whilst I undressed. Then I laid there with my cock out 🤣

firstly  

 

secondly 😳

 

after cancer, MND, dementia and looked in syndrome, a camera up that particular one-way street is up there with the things I hope I manage to avoid while on this earth.
 

My old man had to have it done. Of course you have to be conscious for it. Said the last time he screamed that much was when Everton came from 2-0 down against Sheffield Wednesday to win 3-2 in the 1966 FA cup final 

[wykikitoon 24473]

I was absolutely shitting it. Especially when I walked in and there was 5 female nurses. One for one too 🤣 but they put a numbing gel on the bell and tbh it's more uncomfortable than painful. The weird thing is they filled my bladder up and then emptied it! I basically sat in my own piss.

 

Then!

 

They.wanted to check my prostate and to do that I had to sign a form! Wtf. Here love you've just filmed my bell ends ffs! 

[Renton 25004]

23 hours ago, Gemmill said:

I reckon they just got one look at the captain of team handsome and thought fuck it I'm getting a look at his balls too. 

 

[Renton 25004]

2 hours ago, wykikitoon said:

I was absolutely shitting it. Especially when I walked in and there was 5 female nurses. One for one too 🤣 but they put a numbing gel on the bell and tbh it's more uncomfortable than painful. The weird thing is they filled my bladder up and then emptied it! I basically sat in my own piss.

 

Then!

 

They.wanted to check my prostate and to do that I had to sign a form! Wtf. Here love you've just filmed my bell ends ffs! 

 

Could be worse. My mate has to use intermittent catheters every time to empty his bladder for the foreseeable.

[spongebob toonpants 4643]

1 minute ago, Renton said:

intermittent catheters

Great band

[Ayatollah Hermione 15466]

Absolutely dreading that some of this shit will be coming my way in my 40s  

[Renton 25004]

4 minutes ago, Ayatollah Hermione said:

Absolutely dreading that some of this shit will be coming my way in my 40s  

 

Honestly, so you should. I don't fear death, sweet, sweet death,  I fear falling to bits.