Jimbo

I presumed that they were links to the film "Armageddon" and that Ashley was the asteroid, Earth was Newcastle United, Alan Shearer was Harry Stamper, Chris Houghton was Liv Tyler and Derek Llambias was Ben Afleck, attempting to hump Chris Houghton/Liv Tyler at every given moment.

Ditto

If you are getting it from Orange it will come with full set up instructions.

Well come to the mad house.

Signs for Villa, 3 year deal.

tvcatchup.com too

Harper Raylor - Colo - Taylor - Enrique Jonas - Barton - Nolan - Smith - Duff Carroll

Found his level tbh.

Sad but true, the humiliation continues live on TV.

trust Jimbo!!

The Independent Moat puts jokes on hold to end St James' farce The local boy-made-good in the lead to buy Newcastle United secured his fortune selling novelty toys, but, writes Sam Wallace, is deadly serious about rescuing the ailing club He made his money with a company selling novelty toys like Big Mouth Billy Bass, the singing fish that was the craze of Christmas 2000 and was even given as a present to the Queen. But crass as that sounds, Newcastle businessman Barry Moat will be preferable to Newcastle United fans than the current owner Mike Ashley and the shambles over which he currently presides. Moat, 42, has finally been revealed as the man in the lead to take over Newcastle this summer and install Alan Shearer as manager if he can negotiate a deal worth £80m to £100m with Ashley. For a man who was understood to have been desperate to keep negotiations a secret, Moat has in the past been a shameless self-publicist in the North-east, even writing first-person pieces in the local Journal newspaper about his exploits in the world of business. Compared to Ashley, whose Sports Direct company floated for around £1bn in 2007, Moat is strictly small-time. He made his name as chief executive of Premier Direct, a company who pioneered "workplace selling" of novelty toys – "Choke the Chicken" was another big seller – in which Moat built up a personal stake of around 25 per cent. It will not just be his money that buys Newcastle should the deal be successful, although Moat will undoubtedly enjoy being the public face. He plays golf with the former Olympic triple jump gold medallist Jonathan Edwards, drives a Range Rover with the registration "NU 1" and was on the organising committee for Shearer's testimonial in 2006. A former estate agent who was born in Tynemouth, Moat is thought to have investment from American backers and is sufficiently far advanced in his dealings that if he decides to go ahead no competing consortium will be able to act in time to head him off. He was linked to a possible Newcastle takeover five years ago shortly before he left Premier Direct. Sources yesterday stressed that a Moat-led takeover is not a done deal, although he leads the field by some distance. Moat has had an interesting business career up to now. He was appointed chief executive of Premier Direct at the tender age of 26 in 1993 and four years later led a management buyout with capital venture group 3i. The company was then floated on the AIM in 1997. When Moat eventually stepped down as chief executive in November 2005 he sold a 19 per cent stake in the company at 620p a share, 12 times what he paid for them. By April 2006 the company had issued a profit warning and in June 2008, with shares worth 16p when trading was suspended, it went into administration with the loss of 101 jobs. There is no suggestion that Moat did anything wrong. Moat has kept a decidedly lower-profile since then but has come to epitomise the local boy made good with an eye for getting out of a company while the price is still high. Presumably he has judged the current climate as the right time to buy into Newcastle United – where he has an executive box at St James' Park – and should his bid be successful he would acquire the club for less than half what Ashley has sunk into it. The current owner is believed to have spent in excess of £250m acquiring and investing in Newcastle. Moat has already made himself popular with Newcastle fans by investing in its academy. That a club would need outside investors to help pay for the development of its young footballers tells you everything about the skewed priorities of Newcastle in recent years. As Moat may well be about to find out, it is a lot easier being the local celebrity businessman who supports the club than actually owning the thing.

Dude, they were talking about his time at Metz.

Mike Ashley offers to sell Newcastle for £20m cash down payment Helen Power, George Caulkin Newcastle United are being offered around the City for a fire-sale cash price of £20 million as Barry Moat, a local businessman, races against time to complete a deal to buy the club. The Times has learnt that football intermediaries close to Seymour Pierce, the investment bank hired by Mike Ashley, the Newcastle owner, to sell the club, have contacted several private-equity investors since yesterday to canvass their interest. It is understood the total price tag for Newcastle, who were once being marketed for £400 million, is now between £70 million and £90 million. But, crucially, Ashley is now also offering to loan any buyer the rest of his asking price to secure a sale of the relegated club. Keith Harris, the chairman of Seymour Pierce, is holding parallel talks with Moat and his consortium, which emerged as front-runner for Newcastle yesterday. Moat, a North East businessman whose former company sold novelty toys, is expected to appoint Alan Shearer as manager at St James’ Park if the takeover is completed. The Times revealed on Wednesday that Ashley — who is reviled on Tyneside — had set a deadline of this weekend for the sale of the club. The billionaire, who banked £900 million when he floated his sports retail empire, Sports Direct, two years ago, believes that he needs to secure a sale quickly to give Newcastle a fighting chance of promotion from the Coca-Cola Championship this season. The club need desperately to hire a manager and new players before the transfer window closes on September 1. It is understood that Ashley, while desperate to sell the club, is reluctant to sell to a bidder who cannot afford to buy new players. The last-ditch search for new bidders suggests the Moat deal is far from certain to go through. Sources close to Seymour Pierce said yesterday that Moat has bank financing in place to buy the club and continued to put the chances of a deal as still being in the balance. However, it is believed that the Moat consortium would also have to borrow at least £50 million from Ashley. Since the credit crunch hit last year so-called vendor loan notes — where the seller lends the buyer the money to acquire their business — have become more common. After blocking outgoing transfers for the majority of this summer, with Ashley initially unwilling to impose sporting decisions on prospective new owners, Newcastle are now close to selling Sébastien Bassong and Habib Beye. Harris has been pressing the club to reduce their wage bill and overdraft as a means of persuading potential bidders to cross the line. Having bought the club for £134 million in 2007, Ashley has spent at least another £110 million on reducing debts and other running costs, but salaries among playing staff have continued to spiral. With Obafemi Martins joining Wolfsburg last week for a fee of £9 million, Newcastle will have brought in about £20 million in revenue once Bassong and Beye complete their transfers to Tottenham Hotspur and Hull City respectively. The flurry of activity deepens the suggestion that Ashley is doing his utmost to sell Newcastle, although supporters have been alarmed at reports of parallel approaches to unemployed managers such as Joe Kinnear and David O’Leary. In the event of a sale falling through, Ashley will retain control of Newcastle for at least another 12 months and securing a new manager will become his priority. While Shearer, who led the team for the final eight games of last season, remains the first-choice of players and most fans, Kinnear has claimed that he has been been offered a two-year contract within the past fortnight.

www.tvcatchup.com

Don't bank on Ashley accepting takeover bid for Newcastle, says George Caulkin The Times expert in the North East analyses Barry Moat's attempted takeover and what it could mean for the club. He talks to Ben Smith What are the chances of this deal going through? The bid led by Barry Moat has been recommended to Mike Ashley by Seymour Pierce, the investment bank employed by the Newcastle owner to sell the club. Moat's consortium is the preferred bidder of Keith Harris, Seymour Pierce’s executive chairman, and talks are ongoing at the moment - that's where this is right now. What everyone has to remember is that we are dealing with Mike Ashley here, so we shouldn't get ahead of ourselves. This bid may have been recommended to him, but there are no guarantees that he will accept it. Will Ashley get the £100m he is asking for? That has been his asking price since the end of last season. The talks would not have got to this stage if the bidder didn't have the necessary funds. Whether that is £80m, £90m or even £100m I don't know, but we are not going to get to the point where we suddenly find this consortium hasn't got the funds. Moat's consortium has been secretly negotiating with Ashley and Seymour Pierce for several weeks. They have gone through a pretty exhaustive due diligence process and spoken at length about the wage bill and the overdraft the club has. Would a successful takeover by Moat mean Alan Shearer would return as manager? Yes it would. Moat served as chairman of Alan Shearer’s testimonial committee and Shearer has been kept informed of the ongoing negotiations from Moat's end. He hasn't heard a word from Newcastle who have kept him completely in the dark. If this takeover goes through it would definitely see Shearer come back as manager. What do you know about Moat? He is a recognisable figure at St James' Park and he has never made any secret of his affiliation to Newcastle United. As I have said he was on Shearer's testimonial committee and he is a local businessmen who has been involved in telecommunications and property. He has a box at the club where he regularly attends matches with his family and he has contributed money to the club's academy. Moat is not comparable to a figure like Freddie Shepherd, who had a very high public profile, but he is a well-known and well-liked figure at the club. Ashley originally said the deadline for any deal would be tomorrow. Is that a real deadline or still movable? These deadlines are always relatively fluid. If an acceptable bid came in 24 hours after the deadline, Ashley would still accept it. My understanding is that talks between Newcastle, the consortium and Seymour Pierce are ongoing and my hope would be that a deal could be done by late tomorrow or Saturday. We shouldn't forget that there is nothing to stop Moat's consortium pulling out at the last minute and there is certainly nothing to prevent Ashley from deciding he doesn't want to accept this bid. There is a long way to go and it is very frustrating for the supporters, but there is a chance that something could happen in the next 48 hours. What state does this leave Newcastle in given Joe Kinnear's latest comments and with the new season upon us? It leaves Newcastle behind almost every other club in the division because for the entire summer they haven't had a manager and as a result they have had no players going out and no one coming in. They are trailing the other teams in terms of preparation and just about everything else. If it was to happen by Saturday it would mean Newcastle would have a fresh start, it would mean Alan Shearer coming back to the club and it would mean at least a degree of optimism. At this stage we don't how much money would be available for new players. The prospect of Ashley staying is one that would inspire horror in the fans and hearing Kinnear and seeing names like David O'Leary banded about is terrifying. It is time for Mike Ashley to go and with a bit of luck we are not too far away from that point.

Why use ice when you can use stones ? http://www.thinkgeek.com/caffeine/accessories/ba37/

He's probably careful what he tells gob-shite Super Mac

Jizz-tastic !

Owen aside, the players we have lost probably make a drop in the ocean when it comes to trimming the wage bill, the quality of the squad has taken more of hit rather than the overdraft.

The September edition of Wired magazine.