Ayatollah Hermione

Attackers win games, defenders win titles

I know, it’s great isn’t it

“Man Utd were so bad that it wouldn’t surprise me if Eriksen faked another heart attack to get out of his contract!” - Me on 8 out of 10 Cats

It’s definitely high foot btw Wilson is trying to control a ball that’s 6 foot in the air

The quiet upcoming hiding is Wolves. They can’t score to save their life, haven’t improved the team in the slightest from their terrible end to last season and we’re about to knock on their door. Get through Man City with our pride and they’re there for a battering

This is it. Time is on our side; the players will come.

Not sure he passed the eye test put it that way

Watched about 6 minutes of the match but I think that’s a good result tbh

Kind of day where we could be happy for 5 subs tbh. Wonder if Howe will be tempted to keep Almiron on the bench until late on to give us 20 minutes or so of him against hot, tired defenders. Having 5 subs could well help us keep the press going for the full 90 too if you keep Murphy, Anderson and the other mobile players in reserve

Absolutely cannot STAND brands on Twitter trying to look like your friends by joining in with whatever shit crack is suddenly happening

So, do we reckon anything is actually going to happen to stop energy companies completely ripppppping the piss or do we just have to stock up on thermal clothes and playing cards? It seems almost beyond belief that either of the jumped up daft cunts who’ll be replacing Johnson have to do something because it’s not just poor people they can discard this time

Is that code for something?

Just like you in school when the other lads were playing football.

Gemmill and Fish doing very little to disprove my theory that football stat chat is for the gangly, uncoordinated knackers who couldn’t kick a ball throughout their teenage years tbh

Tarkowski and Coady are definitely better than those two clowns like

ASM provides assist, it’s just his numbers are shite It’s actually a terrible argument to defend him with. What’s far more important to the team is his ability to carry the ball, take players out of the game and get us in and around the box. His end product is unquestionably the weakest part of his game, it just shows you how bad the other wingers in the side are when he’s the best

My stance is the same as PL and I’ve no doubt that Howe and Ashworth pour over the numbers but they’re not sitting there saying “oh, we need a spreader at the back”

The “spreader” position, as made famous by your mam

A draw would be a good result here, I reckon. They are a bit fart and no shite at times, and we’ll not be as giving as Man Utd were to them, but they keep the ball well and do make quite a few chances regardless of who they’re playing. But, with someone as good as Bruno pulling the strings, we have a chance against anyone not named Man City

This is the kind of thing I think we need to be used to. Absolutely no links with him but a player who makes a lot of sense once you have a read about him.

How have we managed to get three kits that somehow clash with another Premier League side? Great bit of vintage Newcastle United

If the Italian sports press told me the sky was blue, I’d have to jump outside and double check

O-Deadia Newton John more like

My mate went down there when Diame scored his wonder goal and apparently, when Perez scored the winner, he spent a good 4 minutes raving about “tory cunts” and then refused to pay 9 quid for a Jack and Coke later on. Once more, calling the bar a “tory shithole” Sounds like a belter day out